


To Washington D.C. With Love

by Candace_X_Chambers



Series: To the NHL with Love [1]
Category: Hockey RPF, Sports RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, An incredibly understanding John, Atherosclerosis, Bad Decisions, Cheating, Chicago Blackhawks, Colorado Avalanche, Coming Out, Concussions, Difficult Decisions, Falling In Love, First Love, Hate Crimes, Hospital, I'll stay with you forever, Life Partners, Love Triangle, M/M, Marriage Proposal, NHL All Stars, NHL Trades, Pining, Pittsburgh Penguins, Protectiveness, Same-Sex Marriage, Sid doesn't know how to say no, Virginity, Washington Capitals, broken hearted, ending of a friendship, gay hockey players, love within the organization, rude Russians, sick people
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-21
Updated: 2014-12-21
Packaged: 2018-01-16 10:37:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 21
Words: 49,783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1344388
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Candace_X_Chambers/pseuds/Candace_X_Chambers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em> "Does it have anything to do with the pictures?" a burnett from CBS.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Excuse me?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Pictures have spread all over Twitter of you sitting in a bar kissing another man before abruptly leaving." Brady (who Sidney has met before from CNN) raises an eyebrow following his statement. "Does this mean you're a homosexual?"</em>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Heart in Hand (RPF version)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/367413) by [salifiable](https://archiveofourown.org/users/salifiable/pseuds/salifiable). 



> I hope everyone likes this. I'm working very hard on all the small details. I had a sudden urge to write this.  
> I unfortunately own nothing except for the ideas and all my mistakes.  
> ~Candace

Chapter 1:

Sidney unlaces his skates and places them in his workout bag. They just finished a horrible 5-1 loss against the Washington Capitals. Luckily it was a road game and not at home. If it was he would be a wreck right now.

"See Sid on plane." Geno touched their foreheads together before leaving. It was really the only acknowledgement he got. He was sort of pissed off considering he scored their goal, but he wasn't going to say anything. The last thing he wanted to do was add insult to injury by making them feel guilty or whatever.

Everyone had already cleared out by the time Sidney willed himself to leave. Luckily he chose to room alone. Wether they win or lose, Sidney always ends up having a bad night for reasons that he'd rather not admit.

Let's just say that it has nothing to do with the ridiculous weather.

The ride back to the hotel is quiet. He tried turning on the radio, but the first thing he heard was about the game, He's surprised he didn't break the knob turning it off.  
With his head hung down, he opens his door and closes if behind him before throwing his bag on the ground and sighing.

"Ovechkin, why are you here?" Sid asks, turning to face the Russian on his bed.

"Wanted to talk." Alex mumbles.

He should say no. He should tell him to leave and don't come back. He should tell him to drop his number and just leave him alone, forget about him. Being so close to his big gay crush isn't healthy for his game.

"About what?" He says, impatientally crossing his arms across his chest.

"Sit down first." Alex pats the area next to him.  
He shouldn't. He should stay exactly where is. Or he should demand Alex to leave. He should. That would be the smart, logical thing to do.

He sits down.

"What is so important that you couldn't just call me and tell me in the morning like a normal person?" Sid sighs.

"Do you consider this.. friendship?" He uses his hands to gesture the space in between them. Sid rolls his eyes and slaps the palm of his hand onto his forehead.

"It's almost eleven o'clock at night and you guys just kicked our ass. So I'm -really- tired." Sid closes his eyes. 

"And you decide to sneak into my room and ask if I'm your -friend-? Wow." Sid opens them back up and looks at Alex, who has a huge grin on his face.

"Well, not only question. Just first," Alex says.

Sid snarls at him. He shouldn't answer. He should kick the stupid Russian out of his room and go to sleep. "Well, I guess. Sure." Sid is going to beat the shit out of himself in the morning.

"Why?" Alex asks.

Sidney raises an eyebrow at him. He shouldn't say 'because I have a major crush on you' or anything close to that. "Because Geno makes me." Finally he does something smart. 

It also makes the smile fall off of Alex's face."Only reason?"

Sid rolls his eyes, more or less at himself. "Well," he really hates himself,"you're kind of... funny, I guess. And nice, in a way. And you're good competition." Sid mumbles the rest, looking down at his feet.

"Really?" There's the cockiness right back where it belongs.

Sid looks back up and into his eyes. "If you ever tell anyone I ever said that I will fucking kill you," Sid threatens, he tries his hardest to sound and look intimidating.

Alex falls on his side onto the bed and laughs. "Sidney Crosby think I'm funny. This is great day," Alex says when he's done.

"Good for you. Now leave." Sid lays down and props himself up on his elbow, staring Alex directly in his gorgeous blue eyes.

"You never returned the question!" Alex points out, looking all to serious. Sidney rolls his eyes and snarls.

"Why am I your friend?" Sid asks. Why does he even try and talk to this guy? Seriously! He's so fucking irritating.

"Hm." Alex hums.

Ovechkin scoots closer to him on the bed, looking him straight in the eyes. Sidney resists the urge to roll them or stare longingly back into his.

"Nothing." Alex says, smiling.

Sidney sits up, rolling his eyes. "Oh fuck you."

"Kidding Sid. Take joke." Sid let himself relax as he fell back onto the bed.

"I'm expecting you to be serious like I was with you. But you're whole life is about making jokes. Why am I surprised I can't have a civil, adult conversation with you?" Sid says.

Alex lays his head on Sidney's shoulder and hums. It's obviously not an American tune. Probably something from Russia.

"I like personality." Alex whispers. "Nice, kind, inocennt. Pretty eyes and smile. Adorable laugh, mainly at my jokes. Love it when it so hard you hold your stomach and get high pitched. Like to make you blush, not just with sex jokes." And it does make Sidney blush, stupid Russians.

"Oh.. uh thanks." Sidney says.

Alex sits up, rubbing his eyes. "I leave now."

"That was the only reason you came?" Sidney asks, his   
voice sounding desperate even to his own ears.  
answer.

"Yes. Just want proof to show Sasha I have non Russian friends." Alex explains.

"Why not ask someone on your team?" Alex shrugs and smiles at him.

Ovechkin pats Sidney's cheek lightly. "Like you more." Then he leaves.

Sidney doesn't understand why he puts up with Ovie. He could easily have kicked him out. There is absolutely no way he'd stay against Sidney's protests with a hallway full of Penguins.

Why does he do it? Alex consistently breaks everyone one of his personal boundaries. Sidney doesn't like to be touched that often. He doesn't know why, he just does.

He also doesn't like flirting and chirping about his sexual orientation for.. obvious reasons. Of course the team doesn't know why, they just do what they're told. No questions asked.

He never allows anyone to be in his personal bubble. No more than an arm lengths apart.

Unless it's for hockey purposes, no one intrudes his personal boundaries.

Except Alex. Then he has a fire burn in his gut and he wants more. It's really stupid, having feelings for a rival.  
At least he's not on the Flyers. Sid would kill himself if he ever gave Claude an overly obvious checking out. He would sprint head first into the wall. No hesitation.  
Alex is.. not bad compared to Claude though. Especially the way Alex's hands on him sends a fire through him. Rather than Claude who makes his blood turn cold. Is that really a bad thing though?

Okay, he's gonna stop thinking now.

He slides under the covers, his cock twitching slightly. 

Being a virgin isn't exactly the easiest thing. Especially being gay and a hockey player where you're surrounded by attractive men who would never question your sexuality. You could walk into a meeting in short shorts and a purse and everyone would think it was just a big joke.

Thre only people who know he's say are himself, Jonathan Toews, and Pat Brisson. Jonny became his best friend a while back and Sid figured he deserved to know (plus he is too). And Pat.. well.. that's his agent. He couldn't just not tell him.

Though it's probably better he's a virgin. At least he can't masturbate to the feeling of someone he doesn't want to inside him.

He's really going to stop thinking.

To prove his determination, he shuts off the light on the bedv stand and forces his eyes to shut. How long until he falls asleep, he doesn't know. He wakes up multiple times due to the many nightmares that have followed him around since childhood. Thankfully, he's thought himself how to control the screams. Sometimes he wakes up with his fist in his mouth. That's a better solution to waking up the people sleeping on either sides of his room.

Around five in the morning, he decides to just wake up. He can't go back to sleep, even if he does he'll wake back up in an hour. So he goes for a jog in that time. 

The cool, November morning breeze cooling down his entire body and letting his body untense while he sets a steady pace. It's not quite the feeling of being on the ice, but nothing is.

Not even being around Alex Ovechkin could ruin the mood he's in when breakfast rolls around.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2:

Sidney sighed. Playing against the Flyers is never fun, even at home. It's always good hockey though. Sid loves hockey, so he tolerates it.

It's not that he hates the Flyers. Off the ice, they're pretty decent people. Key word, -off- the ice. On it they talk shit (especially to Sid) and make dirty plays that the refs never call, they're complete assholes.

Not to mention that Max got traded to them, or whatever happened. They took away his only normal friend, So now he has to deal with a Russian, a goalie, and Johnathan Toews. Okay, Johnny isn't all that bad. Unless you get him around Patrick, who he has been like in love with since he was born.

"Siiiid-neeey!" Max sings as he skates over to him former captain.

"Orange is -really- not your color." Sid smiles. "You look a lot better in black".

"Miss me, eh?" Max reaches out and strokes his cheek.

"Oh my god. Not my face." Sid pushes his hand away.

"You're not my captain anymore. Don't have to follow your orders." Max got a little closer. "Since we don't play for the same team, how 'bout dinner?" Max started skating circles around him, grinning like a psycopath.

"In your dreams, Superstar." Max stopped in front of him,  
his mouth open in shock.

"Don't make me call Claude over here, 'cause that shit hurts man. That shit really hurts." Max started fake crying on Sidney's shoulder. He rubbed his back in large circles. He rolled his eyes at Geno who skated past laughing at him.

"You're a Flyer, right? So fly away. Shoo." Sidney lightly pushed Max off him.

"At least I'm not a bird who can't fly." Max smiles at him.

"Fuck you." Sidney rolls his eyes again. Why does he put  
up with these people?

"Okay." Max's smile got even wider when Sidney blushed.

"Max, what the fuck are you doing?" Claude skates up to them and pokes Max with his stick.

"Nothing yet." Max winked at him.

Sid's gaze adverted over to Claude, who was already staring at him.

"Whatever makes you sleep at night." Sid says.

Apparently, Claude had gotten facial reconstruction over the summer (not really, is purely an exageration). His hair was cut short. It's still messy, but -damn- it makes him look fine.

"Come on Talbot." Claude looked Sidney over twice. "See you on the ice, Crosby."

"Try not to spend to much time in the penalty box." Sid watched as they skated away, butterflies in his stomach.

He is going to kill himself. He is going to dive his head straight into the ice before the game even starts.

"Okay Sid?" Geno asks, a worried expression on his face.

"Yeah. Everything is fucking fantastic."

He feels like a teenage boy sometimes. His hormones can not be acting up like this.

Well, Max always said that hockey makes Sid horny.

Great, now he misses Max.

Now he's thinking about Max.

Which leads him to think about Claude and his uber sexy haircut.

Did he really just use the words 'uber', 'sexy', and 'Claude' all in the same sentence?

His life is over. It is. He can't go on living when he likes a guy who he's supposed to hate with every fiber in his body. If he loses tonight it's going to be all his fault. And he's going to give up on life. He really is.

~

It's a pretty decent game. The Penguins lead it 4-3, with Sidney having a hat trick and an assist in Geno's goal. Max has two and Bourdon managed to sneak one in between Flower's legs. A lucky shot really, but Flower isn't going to let another one happen in the third quarter.

The whole game Sid doesn't have any major problems. A playful push from Max is the only thing that sets him off. He's used to all the obviously illegal hits that aren't called and the overly hard checks into the boards. Giroux doesn't come after him like usual though.

That is until about a quarter of the way into the third quarter. He's behind the Flyer's net, struggling with Downie for the puck. He almost has possession when Claude comes over. His plan was to make an ass out of the both of them by still getting the puck out and scoring. That is expected of him to do.

"Come on faggot. Give me the puck and I'll let you suck my dick later." Claude growls in his ear, lips against it.

His body tenses up as his blood runs cold. It's just enough time for Steve to take the puck. He slips it past Fleury and ties the game. Sidney skates a little wobbly after that.

And this is why Sidney doesn't like sex jokes directed at him. He always over thinks everything and takeas it seriously. He really shouldn't, Claude wouldn't actually mean that. Right?

After that, Giroux attacks him with illegal hits, constantly. One time he flips a speeding Sid over his head, him landing on the ground with a groan. He gets up, refusing to stay down, even after the second and third time it happens. But seriously, are the refs -blind-?

He remains calm through it all, grinding his teeth to keep his sanity. As captain he has to. It would be setting a bad example to throw down his gloves and start an altercation. Dan would be up his ass about it until the last game he ever plays against the Flyers in his life as a Penguin, which will probably end up being his whole career.

Giroux ends up scoring with a minute and a half left. It wasn't Flower's fault at all. There were bodies scrambling everywhere. Not to mention the Flyers had 72 shots on goal. Only five going in is actually pretty impressive.

It still sucks to lose back-to-back games. A road game against the Capitals, it stings but is tolerable. But a home game against the Flyers is fucking heart breaking. 

"Come to bar. We hang out." Geno suggests, hand on Sidney's shoulder.

"It's not like this night could get any worse." Sidney sighs.

~

He hates Geno. He hates all Russians. He hates vodka.. and all alcohol. He hates the Flyers and losing to them at home. He hates losing back to back games.

So when you mix that all together into on night. That means you have one very pisssed off Sidney Crosby.

The only reason he hates Geno is for dragging him into this bar in the first place. He said they'd hang out together. Really, that meant Geno got to catch up with Ilya Bryzgalov and leave Sid all by himself. He had Max with him for about an hour, but he left to dance. Sid knows he isn't the easiest person to talk to, especially since Max has always been the most perverted person Sid has ever met in his life.

He only drinks a little, he plans on designating since Geno is going to be hammered by the end of the night. He also doesn't like to drink that much. Being unable to control his own body, or not remembering what he did last night, isn't exactly on the top of Sidney's to do list. He would love to forget about the 5-4 loss for one night, no matter the consequences. That would be immature and inappropriate, he couldn't just leave him stranded here with no suitable ride home.

It goes okay for a while, staring blankly at the people on the dance floor. Bodies moving in time to every beat of the pop song that Sidney doesn't recognize.

"The gentleman in the booth over there bought this for you." The burnett bartender put down a margarita in front of him and pointed behind him.

He thanked the bartender with a smile and waited for her to move on before he turned around, his heart racing. It might be stupid to react like that, but no one ever buys him a drink. Except Max. But he's Max. It would probably be some stranger. A fan even. He wouldn't be surprised. Absolutely no one would be interested in him. Or maybe it's just a Philadelphia fan who was thinking him for letting him get his ass beat. Just anything else than what it should generally mean.

To his luck, it's Claude sitting there. He starts to think maybe the guy moved and Claude had conveniently filled his place. Then he grins at Sid and raises his glass.

He should bang his head on the table and knock himself unconsciousness. That would be the smart thing to do.

Instead he grabs the drink and heads over there.

"Really?" Sid asks. Claude pats the area next to him and he sits down. He really needs to learn to stop giving. into people.

"Aren't you going to drink it?" Claude asks, watching Sidney carefully.

"Can't. Designating for Geno." Claude grabs one of Sidney's hands, massaging the tense muscles that means he should relax more.

"Do you always have to be Sidney Crosby? You need to let loose and have some fun." Claude says, looking into his eyes. "It's not like you'll get drunk. And I couldn't spike it.. yet."

Sidney rolls his eyes. The feeling of his hand being knead by the Flyer's uncharacteristingly heedful fingers.

"You're an ass." Sid says, a chuckle escaping the other man's lips.

"Seriously, drink it. Calm down. You'll feel a lot better if you do." Claude picks up the beverage putting it in front of Sid's face.

"I hate you." Sidney takes the glass, inhaling it.

"You came over here. Remember?" 

He nurses the beverage as they trade stories about pranks pulled on other teammates (and some on themselves) and their failure attempts at playing hockey under the age of eight. It's actually quite interesting for Sid, getting to talk to someone so casually about hockey without sensing threat. A surprising gesture, still nice though. By the end of his drink, he -does- feel better. He shoulders unstiffen and he let's himself enjoy his company, no matter how horrible the person may or may not actually be.

"Better now, eh?" Claude asks.

"A lot actually. Thanks."

When the pair of lips touch his, he. relaxes even more and kisses back. His tongue being dominated was something he rarely enjoyed, the few kisses he has had he was always in control. Making out, a hand on his crotch, is something he's never done in public, or ever really.

It registers to him a moment afterwards. He's sitting in a bar that is famous for it's athletes, mainly hockey players, so he's not going to be mistaken for somebody else. And yet he's sitting here liplocking with another hockey player -- a rival one at that -- in front of everyone. And oh god.. oh god..

Sidney lightly shoves Claude off of him, his heart speeding up and his palms sweaty.

How could he be so careless? What if someone saw them? What if someone took a pictire? Oh god.. He's such an idiot.

"What's wrong?" Claude asks, wiping his mouth.

"What's -wrong-?" Sid repeats. "How about the fact that we just made out in -public-. Did that even click in your brain?"

"That's what I've been thinking about this whole time. It's not like your little pranks were so fucking hilarious." Claude thinks it over. "Well, when they turned the cold water on blast while you were in the shower is something I'd kill to see." Sidney blushes, shifting uncomfortably.

"Well a little warning would have been nice." Sid points out, licking his lips. "Or asking for permission."

"You did a lot better than I expected you to." Claude cocks his head and grins at him.

"What the hell does that mean?" His eyes shrinking into slits.

"I didn't expect you to kiss back. I almost wanted you to be just as stuck up as Max says." Sid's eyes open fully.

"I am -not- stuck up." Sidney objects.

"You make me stick up." Claude flirts, making Sidney's face go red again. "Take me back to your place and you.. can fix the problem." Sidney's breathing hitches at the request. His heart flutters and a wave of heat is building up in his stomach.

"I'm going to find Geno." Sidney says. He gets up, not wanting to be followed.

He's pretty easy to spot. Him and Ilya stand out. Geno is plastered to a point where it's a miracle he's even standing.

"Come on G. Going home now." 

With one arm slung over Sid's shoulder, he manages to half-carry, half-drag Geno into his car all by himself. He feels pretty proud of himself.

He takes Geno back to Sid's house. He didn't want to leave the Russian all alone being that drunk. He let's his teammate crash in his guest room. The only people who use it are his parents and his sister. Unless Geno believes in cooties or something, it isn't dirty.

Sidney lets his body fall onto the bed. As much as he hates the Flyers and everything they stand for. As much as he hates Russians and a lot of other stuff. Nothing compares to how much he hates himself.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3:

After another embarrasing 1-0 loss to the Philadelphia Flyers on the road, the last thing Sidney wants is to shake their hands. He has to though. No matter how much he'd rather high five them in the face.

They have just one more game for the regular season against the Rangers. Not going into the playoffs would be a new experience for Sid, one he doesn't want to ever experience.

Another thing he doesn't want to experience is having to face the stupid reporters on his way to the locker room. He leads the line in though, he'd rather take the heat than anyone else who really didn't deserve it.

"We're all going to stay here with you, Sid. You lost just like we did and you tried probably harder than all of us." Tanger says. "Except Flower, but he doesn't count."

"Thanks guys." Sid lets his eyes rest on all of them before he walks closer to the giant huddle of his leaat favorite people.

"Wh.. How would you explain the poor performance by your team tonight?" an ESPN reporter asks.

"We didn't play poorly. Um, we weren't connecting on the ice like usual. We still tried our hardest, the Flyers out played us."

"Is there anything in particular that you think messed up your game?"

"No."

 

"Does it have anything to do with the pictures?" a burnett from CBS.

"Excuse me?"

"Pictures have spread all over Twitter of you sitting in a bar kissing another man before abruptly leaving." Brady (who Sidney has met before from CNN) raises an eyebrow following his statement. "Does this mean you're a homosexual?"

"No comment." Sidney's lungs feel like they're shrinking.

"Who is this stranger?"  
"Are you dating him?"  
"Are you having sexual relations with him?"

"I'm not answering anymore questions and neither are my teammates." Sid looked away and almost ran into the locker room.

Sid's heart is thudding hard in his chest. His throat is closing and his breath keeps hitching. He can barely see anything from the tears that he's fighting to keep in as he sits on his bench. His stomach is making knots as it twists out of fear. He's furious, some of it's directed at Claude, most of it at himself. How could he be so stupid, so careless? How could he let himself be exposed in public and .. and.. this is going to ruin him. It's going to destroy his whole career.

His ears start to ring as he pulls out his phone and pulls up Twitter. He prays that it isn't actually him. He hopes that it's very fuzzy and blurry and he can deny it because the only evidence they have is not usable.

The first thing that pops up is the picture. The first one is very unclear. Obviously two men are kissing, but neither faces are recognizable. The next one is the same, they're clearly having a conversation. The third one is.. is clear. No fuzz or grain. It's a clear shot of a man with puffy red lips and slightly messed up hair.

And it's a clear shot of Sidney.

He wills himself not to just drop to the ground and bawl his eyes out. Instead he tosses his phone into his bag and tries to breath calmly and not to think. That doesn't help, makes it worse that he has to cover up his panic attack.

"Sid?" He looks up at the sound of Geno's voice. "What they talk about is true?" He gulps and blinks rapidly.

"Y.. Yes." Sid studders out. He hates how wrecked his voice sounds and knows it must sound worse to them.

"Why didn't you tell us?" Flower asks, sitting next to him. Sid hangs his head.

"I.. I didn't want you guys to hate me." Sid confesses. "And it's not.. normal.. being like this. I'm not supposed to like men, It's wrong and.. and.. I couldn't tell anyone, even if I wanted to."

"Stand up." Geno orders. Sid does what he's told, kind of expecting to get punched or something.

Instead he gets hugged and lips brush against the side of his head.

"Never hate you Sid." Geno says louder than what he really should. He lets him go and takes a step back. "If anyone have problem with this or hate Sid now or whatever. Then leave now, trade later."

"No. Ass beating now, leave afterwards, then you get traded." Tanger threatens. "Considering if you can still walk."

"You ain't gonna do shit." Brooks kicks him in the shin. Tanger punches the air and Orpik pretends like it actually hit him in the face and they air fight each other.

Until Claude Giroux walks in.

"Hey Sidney," he says, shifting foot to foot as he receives death glares from everyone, "can I talk to you.. alone?"

Sidney takes a steo toward him, but Geno puts his hand on his chest to make him stop.

"Anything you say to him you say to everyone." Geno commands.

"G, it's fine." Sidney tries to move past him, but Cooke grabs his shoulder and makes him stop.

"Geno is right, for once. Anything you say to our captain can be said in front of us." Cooke adds.

"I'm sorry. If you wanna call me tomorow we can talk about it then." Sid apologizes. Claude shakes his head and blushes, well it's barely noticable.

"No, it's fine. I'm sure this will affect them more. than it will me." His teammates let out a growl. Claude stuff his hands nervously into his pockets.

"About the pictures," Claude says, "I was just wondering if you were going to come out. I'm going to. I just wanted to know whether or not I should leave your name out." Sid feels Geno stiffen beside him.

"I don't know." Sid replies. "I just heard about it when the reporters almost attacked me with questions. I haven't had enough time to call Pat or Mario. I haven't even talked to Coach yet." Claude nods, looking into his eyes.

"Okay. So you um.. Do you want my number? That would probably be best. If you want I can get it from Max. It might be more.. convenient." Claude suggested, shifting nervously.

"I can give it you." Sidney pried Geno's grip off his shirt, shaking away Cooke's hand.

They exchanged numbers. Claude told him the time that the bus went back to Philadelphia, and Sid gave him the time practice starts and ends.

"So I'll call you when I'm done with management." Sid promised. Claude shoved his phone in his back pocket and looked at him.

"I'll be waiting." He says.

Claude hugs him, hands on his waist. Sidney wraps his arms around his neck. It surprises him at first, and it also suprises him when Claude was a little reluctant to pull back,

"Bye." Sidney says.

"Bye." Claude says. He watches Sidney for a couple more seconds before he actually does leave.

As soon as the door clicks and Sidney turns around, the room erupts into barf noises. Well, Geno is bent over in laughter when Flower falls onto the floor. Sidney covers his face and sits back down on the bench.

"I change my mind." Tanger says. "I do hate you."

"Flyer Sid, really?" Brooks asks, pretending to barf on top of Tanger.

"If you like orange that much, then you should've tried for Max at least." Flower adds from his position on the ground.

"Ovie would be better." Geno has to sit on the bench and wipe his eyes from how hard he's laughing. Sidney blushes, thank god he's covering his face.

"What the -fuck- is going on here?" Dan's voice is louder than all the noise. It dies down, except for Geno's and Marc's deep chuckles, and Sidney uncovers his face.

"Everyone, shower and leave." Dan drops his voice. "Sidney, I'll set up a meeting after practice." He disappears from the way he came and the chatter starts up again.

"I just have one question for Sid." Neal says, crouching in front of his captain so they're at eye level.

"Fine." Sidney gives in.

"Would you have sex, or at least give head to, anyone in this room?" Neal tries to keep a straight face while he speaks, but the corners of his mouth keep twitching upwards.

"Uh.. uh.. no comment?" Sid's cheeks start to burn from the color that creeps onto them.

"Well I am very much single." James flirts, giving a friendly smile.

"My previous rules still apply. I hope you guys know that." Sid reminds them.

"No they don't." Kuni ruffles his hair as him and Neal head off to the shower.

"Come on, before take all hot water." Geno says, shaking his shoulder.

"No, it's fine. I can wait until you're all done and go then." Sid shrugs.

"Nonsense, Sid." Geno raises his eyebrows.

"I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable. I'll be fine." Flower flicks him in the ear.

"Ow! Dick."

"Now get up before we gang rape you." Flower pulls him up by the elbow.

"Fuck you." Sid teases.

"No. We're going to fuck you. That's kind of how rape works." Flower takes off Sid's jersey and pads.

"I know how to undress myself." Sidney swats Flower's hands away.

"Just thought you'd like the attention." Flower grins at him before removing his own clothes.

"I hate you fuckers."

Actually that statement is very wrong. He loves his teammates. They're his second family. Well, they might be his only family after tomorrow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to let you know what I said about homosexuals is, as you should already know, is completely not my own opinion. I don't hate my sexuality and obviously I don't think it's wrong to be like me.  
> I really wanted this chapter to show their love for each other and the brotherhood that runs deep. Most guys would turn around a gay friend, especially when they're exposed around them quite often like hockey players are. I personally find this bullshit, my friends (mostly) didn't treat me like that.  
> I also want to inform you that I'm getting to the Sid/Alex part here pretty soon. So just stay with me.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4:

Sidney has officially started to freak the fuck out. He was fine in the locker room, near all his understanding teammates. Now, sitting in his lonely hotel room, he doesn't know what to do. He can't go bother his teammates anymore. He doesn't want to act all clingy and stuff. Trying to contact parents or someone would be a big mistake.

So he calls the one person he can who knows what he's going through.

"Sidney, it's almost three in the morning. What do you want?" Jonathan Toews asks, his voice groggy.

"It's only like midnight."

"I'm in Toronto asshole." Jonny sighs, "What do you want?"

"Have you checked Twitter recently?" Sid asks, resisting the urge to chew on his finger nails.

"Yeah I did." Jonny pauses. "What do you want to do?"

"I don't know. That's kind of the reason I wanted to call you, oh smart one." Jonny chuckles that really adorable laugh that Sid loves.

"Well you already know that I would help you hoist up that rainbow flag any day of the week." Sid chuckles lightly, "Seriously Sidney. Forget about everyone else. Forget about the fans, the press, the Penguins, me, hockey, your family. Foget everything." Jonny stops to let that sink in. "Now what do you want to do? What do you think would be best for Sidney?" Sid runs a hand through his hair and sighs.

"You are. the absolutely worst advice giver in all of mankind." Sidney jokes.

"Hey! It's not my fault that your life is one big soap opera and when you finally get some action it gets plastered all over the news." Jonny defends.

"Baby, who are you talking to?" a deep voice says from the other end.

"Uh. Uh.. No one. Just go back to sleep." Jonny says to the other person.

"'Kay. Love you." the deep voice says, Jonny returns it right before the door clicks shut.

"Was that Kaner?" Sidney asks. Jonny groans.

"Yes, Oh my god. Don't freak out on me."

"Why didn't you tell me!? You've had feelings for him since.. since you knew what feelings are." Sidney asks. "I feel very betrayed."

"Oh -really-? Then how's the guy in the picture?" Jonny makes a clicking sound with his tongue. Sid's blood freezes over.

"Fine. We're even." Sidney compromises. "But he just told you that he loves you and I consider that to be pretty big and-"

"He's drunk." Jonny interrupts.

"You're an idiot."

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"Not!"

"Being a captain, you should know better than to sleep with your teammates. Especially when drunk. C'mon Jonny."

"He waltzes in here and starts kissing me before I can even react. It all happened so fast.. I didn't even have time to check if he's drunk.. or.. or if he feels the same about me." Jonny explains. Sidney hears the thud of what he assumes is his friend's head hitting the wall.

"Okay. I understand." He actually doesn't. People don't just come over to his room and come onto his him that. Obviously the mess he's in may or may not be a lot worse.

"Why do you lie to me?" Jonny asks. "You've got a great body and you're sexy and all. But we both know that no guys are lining up at your door," Jonny chuckles at himself. "Though I'm sure they would if you came out."

Sid lets out a small laugh. It feels good just to joke like it's all no big deal, because it's really not.

"If you decide to come out," Jonny says, "make sure you tell me in advance. I wanna support you and defend you in every way possible. And maybe come out too. Because if you start this revolution, there are going to be lots who follow."

"Revolution?" Sid repeats. "It's not even that big of a deal!"

"To us it's nothing. But to all of those peoole who feed off of invading our personal lives to support their families, this is a -big deal-." Jonny replies. "Wayne Gretzky titled you as the 'Great One'. He passed his torch onto you! He said you're gonna really change the game! Well, probably not in this way. But you can still use that flame to light up this path of equality and prove to all that athletes are no exception."

"Hey Jonny,"

"Yes dear?"

"Go to sleep and definitely keep your day job." Jonny giggles at him.

"Will do. Love you, Sidney."

"Love you too."

Sid hangs up, tossing his phone into his bag. With a loud sigh he flops back onto his bed and shuts his eyes.

Thinking over what Jonny said, it actually is a big deal. Having to put everyone else aside to thank about himself. Sidney is not at all selfish, he puts so many others in front of himself. So thinking about what he wants and what he needs is very hard for him. And forgetting about hockey. Impossible.

He has to though, Jonny does know what he's talking about.

Sidney Crosby. Regular person. No professional hockey. No celebrity status. No endorsements. Nothing. About to come out to his parents --

Sidney forces his eyes open. His -parents-. What is he going to say to them? They're going to hate him, that's for sure. They aren't going to love him. Taylor is going to be their new favorite.

Ugh. Taylor! He totally forgot his baby sister. What will he tell her? She might not hate him. She'll probably expect to go shopping for clothes and shoes and go boy watching. Ew, she'll make him listen to her boy crushes (and expect him too, even worse). Taylor is going to have him make a .list of like every guy he's ever had feelings for in the history of his existence. And that would mean having to talk to her about Alex.

Now he's thinking about Alex. Should he tell him? I mean, he guesses that they're friends or whatever. But it's not like he deserves to be told straight up or anything. Ovie has caused him a lot of problems as it is, the last thing he wants is to have to tell the guy he likes about his sexuality.

Wow, he sounds like Jonny when he talks about Kaner. Ew.

He hears his phone start to buzz, so he groans before picking it up.

-need to talk?- the text from Alex reads.

-in the morning- he replies.

-be waiting- is the last thing he reads before shutting it off.

He tucks it under his pillow, laying his head on top of it.

This is all really his fault. It really is. As captain -- and as someone in the closet -- he should've known better than to drink with a rival. He shouldn't have been so irresponsible to let his emotions get in the way of his actions. He really needs to learn to say no, even if his whole body screams yes.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry. But this may seem a little boring or dull. .  
> I also updated chapter one. If you read the before march 27th and haven't done it yet, you should. I'm just going to warn you in advance that in this the Penguins haven't won the Stanley Cup yet. So just deal with it.  
> Also I'm really sorry for not posting in a while. I had to rewrite this several times. This was the best version, so I hope you like it.

Chapter 5:

Waking up to the sound of his phone receiving a call is never a pleasant way to wake up. Especially when that call comes in at -Four in the morning-.

"Sidney. You awake?" Pat asks.

"Am now." Sid groaned into the phone. He rubs his right eye with his wrist and sits up.

"Okay good." Pat sounds nervous, his breathing uneven and his voice just a bit shaky. "Have you made a decision yet?"

"No I haven't." Sid replies.

"Okay. Well I just talked to Giroux and he wants to talk it over tomorrow. Then you and I will have a private conversation with Mario." Pat explains, "What do you want to do? It doesn't have to be a permanent answer right now, but I need to know where your head is at." Sidney hesitates, his head starting to throb with how fast his life has changed.

"I want to come out. And I've got supporters. That doesn't even include the team." Sidney answers. He doesn't know why he says the last part, but it sounded important in his head.

"Good, good. We can uh.. make a list of people who want to personally aid to your.. coming out tomorrow. For now, get some rest. If you change your mind, no one will judge you."

"I appreciate it Pat. Goodnight." Sidney smiles for absolutely no reason.

"Thanks to your crazy ass soap opera life, this is the start of my morning." Pat retorts before hanging up on Sid.

He smiles more. Glad to know somethings can't change your agents.

~

He spends to night mostly tossing and turning and practice feels like hell. The whole team seems to be avoiding him for no reason.

Well fuck them, Sid repeats in his head as he switches to taking shots on the goal without Flower or Vokoun. It's kind of hard to play by yourself against an imaginary defense.

Desprite times call for desprite measures. And Sidney feels very desprite.

No one jokes around with him or chirp about his awkward skating from last night's restless sleep. They have plenty of fun just joking about each other's whatever. He's even left alone when he waits for everyone else to shower and leave before he takes off his pads. He doesn't understand what their deal is, but whatever. He has enough drama going on right now that he doesn't have the heart or energy to find out.

"Hello Sidney." Is the first thing he hears the instant he steps foot into the meeting room.

The meeting room isn't a very large place. Tan walls, white tile floor. A round table in the center with three chairs. And a screen that would need a projector kept in the back on the wall.

Sidney shakes his agent's outstretched hand with a pleasant of a smile that he can manage. "Pat."

"Please, take a seat and we shall begin." Pat says yawning and sitting down on a chair in the front of the round table.

Claude doesn't look up at him. Just sits there with a pale face and troubled expression. Sidney sits down, slowly and suspicously.

Pat picks his briefcase off the ground and sets it on the table. "Okay," he yawns again. "Regarding our discussion last night. Sidney, any changes?"

"No."

"Claude. As your agent, I should tell you that coming out could get you a better contract deal. And also a lot of publicity." Pat shakes his head. "But that is a bunch of bullshit. I am your friend, and I'm going to tell you to do whatever makes you happy."

Claude looks at his lap, clearing his throat. "For the interests of my career and my family. I decided that I can't be dragged into this." His voice is raspy, very rough and he gulps when he's done.

Pat sighs (seemingly out of relief). "I do appreciate you making everyone's lives easier. If you ever change your mind or if you just need to talk, you know my number."

"Can I leave?" Pat nods once. Claude springs up and leaves in such a rush, a breeze follows him out.

"Musta been awkward, huh?" Pat slumps back in his seat, raising an eyebrow at Sidney.

"Yeah uh I guess." Sidney shakes his head. Whatever Claude's problem is is his issue and surely Sidney doesn't need to be involved with it.

Pat rolls his shoulder. "What did your parents say?"

"Huh?" Sidney asks.

Pat rolls his eyes at Sidney. "You know, when you told them about all this." He uses his hands to gesture to their situation (technically it was to the air, but it's obvious what he meant).

Sidney stares at his agent dumbfound, resisting the urge to purposefully push his own chair over and face plant on the tiles.

Pat does face plant on the table though, letting out a loud groan. "Sidney, I love you to death. But you're an idiot." Pat says, sitting up straight again.

Sidney pulls out his phone, "I'll skype with them later."

"Okay. Correction. You're a moron." Sidney peers up at him. "We're flying to Canada today dingus." When Sidney's facial expression and confusion over his lack of description doesn't change, "So you can talk to them in person."

"I so knew that." Sidney lies.

Pat stands up, crossing over to Sid and placing a hand on his shoulder. "Maybe you should try talking to someone who knows more about this than I do. It might help."

Sidney smiles at him. He literally has no idea what the fuck he's saying, or at least trying to say, but he figures he has good intentions. "Now get up. Have to get meet Mr. Boss Man."

~

Mario's meeting room isn't much different than the previous one. Except it has a rectangular table and mote chairs. And a pissed off general manager.

Ray shoots up from his chair as soon as the door is clicked shut. "What the fuck is the matter with you?" Ray asks.

"Ray. Sit down." Mario commands, looking at his general manager.

"Are you fucking kidding me! Our star player decides to have a public orgy with his secrey fuck buddy and not tell us about it. How could you -not- be pissed off?" Ray's face turns a medium shade of red as he yells.

Mario slowly stands up, getting in Ray's face. He snarls something inaudible, a very dangerous look in his death glare. Ray glances at Sidney before slinking back down into his seat with his head hung in shame.

Mario folds his hands and gestures for Sidney to take s seat in front of him. After he has obeyed, the lecture begins.  
"Sidney. Ray clearly didn't express our concerns in an appropriate manner by any means," Mario says, "What he did intend to say was correct." He sighs. "I know it was never your .. plan to be caught kissing that man in the bar that night. We know you are much more responsible than that. You're to responsible for your age." Mario half smiles. "But we are.. disappointed for not being told about your boyfriend in case something like this did happen. But now we know and we can treat it properly."

"He's not my boyfriend." Sidney objects. "it was just a kiss, nothing more."

"Shame." He can hear the trace of amusement in Mario's voice. "Okay. Well. Since starting to road trip in Canada with the Senators. We'll probably set up a stage in Montreal right before heading to Toronto. Okay?"

"Is that it?" Sidney asks.

Mario looks at him, raising both eyebrows up to his hairline. "Uh. Well, do you have any questions or concerns or things to bitch about?"

"No."

Ray groans loudly. "Thank jesus that is over. Now we can talk about hockey things. I'll go get Dan." He practically jumps out of his seat and runs to the door in order to leave the most awkward situation of his life.

Mario reaches out, grabbing Sidney's hand. "Why didn't you tell me?"

Pat playfully kicks him in the calf. "Dingus hasn't even told his parents."

"Well I suspected that much." Mario squeezes Sidney's hand. "I took you into my home for a long time. I am a lot different than your parents. So why?"

Sidney looks into those eyes he always finds so soothing and homey. "I didn't want you to hate me." His voice sounds so small and pathetic even to himself.

Mario rolls his eyes. "I don't hate my first son and I'm never going to hate. my second."

"Unless you keep losing to your boy toys." Dan says as he pushes open the door and plops down into Ray's former seat, leaving the general manager to stand awkwardly at his side.

"Glad to know you have so much confidence in me Dan. Appreciate it."

Dan props his feet up on the table and smirks. "Hey. I'm just stating the fact that both times we lost in the last few weeks have had teams with some pretty attractive players on them." Dan's glasses slide down to the bridge of his nose as he looks at Sidney seriously (or tries to anyways).

"Maybe we should talk about something hockey instead of human life." Ray says as he scratches the back of his neck and shifts from foot to foot.

"Someone's a little afraid of the other team, are we?" Dan asks, smiling up at him.

Ray's eyes go wide as he balls his fists. "I have absolutely no problem with homosexuals. And we all play on God's team, thank you very much."

Mario slams the table. "Ladies! We have some serious business trying to attend to. So stop playing with each other and act like adults."

Ray hangs his head while Dan smiles proudly like he won the Stanley Cup for the first time.

"Okay. So the Senators are playing poorly right now."

~

The meeting and practice lasted about three hours. The guys weren't as chirpy as usual (not that he was complaining). They didn't seem to be acting specifically friendly towards him either. Whatever.

Getting on their private plan was a different story. They acted as friendly as ever. Especially when Flower and Geno fell asleep on Sid's shoulders. (With Marc drooling a little. Ew so disgusting).

Getting off the plane and getting into their hotelroom took about another two hours. Not to include getting to his room and having to explain to Geno (who he's rooming with) where he's going, why he's going there, and that there is now way on hell he's allowed to let drunk, naked girls get anywhere near his bed, and then trying to hide hid bag where no one would find it under his bed took about another two and a half. By the time he was standing at his parent's door step, it was seven o'clock and his sister would definitely be there.

Great.

He does knock and wait patientally for them to open. Drove all the way here, might as well do something useful.

His mother opens the door looking startled. "Come in sweety."

The house is quiet, minus the soft hum of the voices from the T.V. "Where's Taylor?" There is no way a place could ever be this quiet with a teenage girl living in it.

"Asleep." His mom says. Her face is pale, gets ever worse when Troy gets up from his spot on the couch and meets them in the middle of the living room.

"Sidney," his father says, "why didn't you tell us?"

They stare into each other's eyes. Sidney swallows trying to inhale like a normal person. "I didn't want you to be disappointed in me. I wanted to be your perfect child and nothing less."

"Baby, we'll never be disappointed in you." his mother hugs him, sympathy all over his face. His dad, on the other hand, continues to stare at him, expression only softening a little.

Troy cocks his head to the side. "Does he treat you right?"

"Well we're not actually.. together."

His mom takes a step back, placing her hands on her hips. His dad smiles and pats his shoulder.

"My little boy is finally a man."

His mother gasps. "How could you condone this type of rude behavior? We raised our son to be respectful to others and himself. Sidney Patrick Crosby, I am very disa.. angered by the way you decided to treat your body. You are a very good looking kid. You can't just fling your dick towards-"

"Oh my god. That didn't not happen." Sidney interrupts.

"Sure it didn't." Troy smiles wider at him. "Well I'm sure your agent has already come up with a plan to cover up the situation, eh?"

Sidney's chest tightens. "Actually... I decided to come out."

His dad closes his eyes and sighs loudly. "What?" He opens his eyes and looks at his son so serious it's almost painful.

"There isn't any other option." Sidney defends.

Tina walks off to the couch, sitting there and possibly crying. Troy pinches the bridge of his nose. "So you're telling me that there is no way to hide how much of a fag you are?"

Sidney cringes. "It was clearly me there and there isn't a doubt about what I was doing. And we can't claim that I was drunk considering I only had one drink the whole night and I drove home."

His dad's face turns a bright red like Ray's did earlier and he knows he's in for a serious bitching.

"Do you not understand how painful it's been to turn on ESPN or any other sports channel and have to hear about your controversial pictures? And you expect to barge in here, tell us how you have to ruin your career and expect us to forgive you!" his dad yells. "You have no fucking idea how many people have stopped me or your mother at the store or around town to gossip about you. Or how Taylor gets teased because her big hockey star brother is actually a big queer bag."

Sidney blinks, biting his lip. "Dad-"

"No. You don't get to call me that. Only my son does. And of you go through with this then Taylor is going to be an only child." His dad squints his eyes.

Sidney's air gets caught in his lungs as well as any intelligable words. "You can't be serious."

"I am very fucking serious." Troy says as his voice starts to rise. "Hockey is meant to be played by real men. Not little boys who strive to get on their backs."

"Daddy, you can't just talk to him like that." Taylor says, coming down the stairs. "He's part of our family. We always put our differences aside and love each other unconditionally. How is Sidney any different?"

Tina gets up and tries to force Taylor up the stairs. "Get out." Troy growls.

Sidney gives Taylor one last look over before he does leave. Getting in his car and driving back to the hotel seems to take a lot less time than the first trip.

Maybe it's because he's speeding and driving like a maniac.

No one throws him a second glance as he goes into elevator and slumps down the hallway to his room.

Could this day get any worse?

Sidney opens the door slowly, hoping that Geno would be asleep or not here or something.

"Sid!" Ovechkin says as Sidney closes the door behind him.

"Oh my god. What are you doing here?" Sidney groans and sits on the foot of his bed.

"Came to see best friend. Haven't heard from in while. Concerned." Alex sits on Sidney's bed crosslegged and facing his side. "Plus we in Toronto, boring city."

"I said I was your friend. Not your best friend." Sidney corrects. "I thought Bäckström was your best friend."

Alex puts his hand on Sidney's shoulder. "He is Swed. No count. Need American BFF."

Sidney can't help but smile, the things Alex says sometimes are ridiculous. "That makes no sense but whatever," He turns so he's facing Alex fully and sitting in the same position as him. "But why me? There are Americans on your team that you could hang out with. Why would you want to be with the big gay freak that's hated by even his own parents?"

Alex sighs and drops his hand from Sidney's shoulder to his thigh. "Know what you're going through."

"Huh?" Why can he never manage to say anything smart when he needs to?

Alex chuckles at him. "I know suprising. Is not gay, just bisexual. Told parents, hate me for while. Not completely comfortable, more tolerates it. Don't bring guys home so maybe why don't complain."

Sidney licks his lips, thinking it over. "That is suprising. But you could've just called me or skyped me or something. What was the point of driving all the way out here?"

Alex raises an eyebrow at him. Reaching out to brush his thumb over Sidney's bottom lip.

Oh.

Alex wants him. Drove all the way down here for him. Sidney should be happy, exstatic. This is what he sort of kind of wanted.

Why is he so scared?

"Do you not.. want..?" Alex asks, his accent deeper than usual.

"I.. I do.. but.. but.." Sidney studders. "I'm just.. not very good at this."

Alex brushes his fingers along Sidney's jaw. "Sure mystery man disagree."

Sidney closed his eyes and waited for the kiss. Hoping he was prepared and totally didn't fail.

When their lips finally met. It was soft, sweet. More than a brush of the lips but not quite a full kiss. It caught him off guard, but he wasn't when Alex's tongue touched his bottom lip.

He opens his mouth instinctively. He let Alex dominate and push him onto his back. The Russian lays on top of him, straddling his hips. He's only half laying on Sidney, reaching down to pull his shirt up some. Sidney knows what he wants, but he doesn't want to stop kissing. Alex pulls away anyways, squinting his eyes at Sidney.

"Sid." Alex groans. "Shirt."

Sidney rolls his eyes, using the moment to recatch his breath and removing their tops before going at it again.

This time it's much more ferocious. Their tongues fighting to be the leader. Sidney's hands runs through the Russian's hair while Alex hands travel around his chest. Feeling every inch of him.

His lungs feel like they're about to burst. He honestly really doesn't care, but apparently Alex wants to continue living so he breaks the kiss and moves down to Sid's neck.

He let's out a quiet moan as Alex's tongue and mouth travels along his throat and collar bone, looking for that sensitive spot. When he finds the area right underneath his earlobe and licks it, Sidney's back arches a little off the bed.

"Alex." He moans, stretching out the syllables as much as possible.

Alex continues to suck and kiss that spot, sliding his hand downs Sidney's stomach and grabbing his belt. Oh god, his pulse starts to race and he shuts his eyes. Letting out another moan.

"Sidney you- hell?" 

They pull apart. Alex sitting up straight and smiling victoriously at Geno. Sidney blushes furiously and it travels all the way down to his chest.

"Hi Zhenya." Alex says.

Sidney expects Geno to flip out. To go ape shit on him and like punch the both to the death and throw their bodies in their trunk.

Instead he smiles brightly and looks at Sidney accusingly. "I am confuse. You said I no bring back pretty girls. Yet you can?" Geno asks, placing his hands on his hips. "Because Sanja is very pretty girl."

Sidney rolls his eyes. "I said that you can't fuck them on my bed. Never said you couldn't bring the back here."

"Stupid Canadians." Geno scoffs before throwing his body onto his bed, "Okay. Continue. I put in ear plungs and shut eyes. Not even here."

Alex smiles mischeviously at Sidney, who blushes. "No."

"Sid is ashamed of body. Your problem." Alex winks at Sidney, picking his shirt up off the ground and sliding it on.

"I hate you. I really do."

He hears Geno laughing from his bed and Sidney throws a pillow at him. It wasn't very hard, but Geno pretends to be hurt by rolling off his bed.

Geno stands up, holding an imaginary shot gun. "It's on now."

"You two, freaks. Am leaving now." Alex says. He stands up, bending over to press a kiss onto Sidney's lips and his sensitive spot. "Don't have to do this alone." Alex goes back to Sidney's lips, kissing him hard and with passion.

"Ew. Trying to keep down food." Geno pulls on Alex's arm, causing the kiss to break.

Alex mouths the words 'Call me' before Geno shoves him outside. He turns on Sidney, looking at him with a judgemental look.

"What?" Sidney asks. "He's better than Claude."

Geno thinks it over, but does nod. "Sure. But Sanja is.. different."

Sidney picks his shirt up off the ground. "How?"

Geno sits down on his own bed, sighing. "Claude is big, no emotion, asshole. Only wants.. sex. No strings. Sanja want more."

"You're kidding." Sidney says. Please dear god let him be kidding.

Geno puts his hands in the air. "Not say anything Sanja not want me to. But how many people would drive Toronto to Montreal just to see if someone interested when could have just waited fate to bring them together?" Geno shrugs before grabbing his towel and going to the bathroom.

Maybe Russians seriously had him or something. They always do this to him. Say things that should receive more detail, but instead they just leave. Which just makes him even more confused and frustrated.

Maybe it's just these two Russians that do that. Maybe all the others are just normal people who don't strive on ruining their best friends lives.

Maybe Alex was just being stupid and playing a joke on him or something. Then he brought Geno in on this for the ultimate betrayel. Such assholes.

If Alex really did want the... friends with benefits thing then Sidney could surely do that. It might be awkward considering it would be his first and everything. But it seriously can't be that hard.

Or if he wanted a relationship, Sidney can do that. He's had a few boyfriends. They tended to be short and horrible and.. weird. He even dated a girl before. Never again. It always ended with him having a broken heart wether he cared about the person or not. Then he'd have to go home to his parents and pretend it never even happened.

At least now he doesn't have to worry about his parents anymore. He sister when she turns into an adult, but that won't happen for another five years.

Sidney could surely get used to being with Alex. Even if that meant having to deal with those annoying Russians while he does. He could -definitely- get used to kissing him.

He feels his cock twitch in his pants. Sidney inhaled and exhaled as evenly as he could manage. He honestly doesn't remember being this hard. When he thinks about the way Alex's tongue along his neck and in his mouth, it's hard not to be that hard.

To distract himself, he pulls out his phone. He skims through his contacts until he finds Pat's name. He thinks it over before sending a simple 'didnt go well.'

'How bad?' Pat replies.

'Gonna need a new last name.'

'Sorry.'

Since Pat is the most boring person in the world (and possibly the most unplugged) he decides to text Mario the same news. Around ten minutes later, he receives a lengthy message back.

'Sid, I'm sorry. Truly. If your parents choose to disown you, then that's their problem. You are a great kid and who you want to spend ur nights with is not ur fault. I love u. Always will. Of u need a new last name, sure there are lots. Practically anything should sound good with sidney. I know one that starts with an L that you may be interested in :) ur parents will probably end up getting interviewed and annouce this on tv and then it will be a disaster. so we'll deal with this after tomorrows game. get some rest, no wories.'

He smiles to himself, letting a singular tear fall. He'll be strong, no more. 'Okay, love u 2'.

Geno finally gets out of the shower. He wears only a towel and his hair drips with water.

"Look better than Sanja." Geno jokes.

Sidney gives him a light chuckle before brushing brightly and jogging into the bathroom. Now he has two things to jerk off to.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry.

Chapter 6:

Geno keeps giving Sidney stupid looks every time he can. Wether it's him just suggestively wagging his eyebrows or giving Sidney a bewildered look while they practice, it's there. It's funny at first, having an inside joke. Then when some people start to notice it gets.. awkward. Fast.

"Hey uh G, Sid. What is with all the.. faces?" Staal asks as soon as they enter the locker room after morning's practice.

Geno smiles at Sidney. "Why don't tell them Sid?"

Sidney narrows his eyes at this stupid Russian he calls his friend. "There isn't anything to tell."

"Does Sid have a new boyfriend?" Flower asks, leaning on Staal's shoulder.

Sidney blushes instantly. "What.. I.. I haven't had one in a while."

"And Claude no boyfriend?" Geno looks way to amused.

"No. He's not, never has been and never will be." Sidney says defensively. "Why are you people so interested in my love life anyway?"

Kuni places a hand on Sidney's shoulder. "Because everyone here thought the only thing that got you off was hockey. We are. all very happy to see that isn't true." Kuni slaps him on the back. "Also if he breaks your heart we know who to beat up."

Brooks pokes Sidney's cheek for absolutely no reason (probably just because he's Brooks and that's what Brooks does). Sidney pushes past all of them and goes to his locker. Seriously, why do these guys care so much?

"Guys, I'm fine." Sidney sighs, sitting down to untie his skates.

James sits down next to Sidney. "Sid, we know you're. fine. We just.. want to know that no one is.. taking advantage of you just because you're.. you." James sighs. "What I'm saying is, wether these dumbasses say it out loud or not, we love you. And we just want to protect our greatest investment."

Great, now his eyes are watering. "Maybe you guys should be protecting me from your horrible play on the ice." James pretends to look offended as Sidney keeps insulting him. "But if we win tonight, -maybe- I'll believe you."

Geno kicks Sidney in the shin, giving him a very serious and dangerous look. "Then we meet boyfriend."

Sidney rolls his eyes, this guy is relentless on meeting someone that doesn't exist. "Yeah sure. Whatever."

Geno kicks him again, more like a tap. Before walking away, he mouths the word 'Sanja' and smirks at Sidney.

Why does he like the worst possible Russians in the world?

No one really says a word to him about it, or anything at all really. Must have decided that was enough chirping for one day. Then again, they -never- stop teasing (especially not him).

He purposefully undresses slowly, stopping after removing his pads to respond to the million texts from Alex.

It's actually only fifty-three (which is close to a million as far as Sidney's concerned). They mainly consists of Alex wanting to know all of his secrets, making dirty jokes, and some say something in Russian. 

There's like ten pictures. Seven of them are just pictures of Alex doing something unintelligent while trying to look badass. It's actually quite hilarious because he's so confident. Then there are two of some. male strippers with the caption 'wanna join?'. Sidney shakes it off, Alex is annoying.

The last one is.. different. It's still Alex is just.. It's in a hotelroom, the lights are off. He's siting there, shirtless and emotionless. There is a caption underneath it, 'thinking of you.' Sidney doesn't get it at first. Then he sees it.

The tip of Alex's dick, his finger on the hole.. Sidney backs out of it quickly, heart beating furiously.

This sex thing is overrated.

He scrolls back down, looking to see if anyone had more interest in him than his Russian lunatic.

Sidney is surprised to see one.. from Taylor. He locks his phone. Dealing with his sister should be done in private. Not in the middle of a locker room while he procrastinates for no reason. 

"Sid, up. Need shower." Geno says, flicking Sid's ear. "Sanja no like smelly Sid."

Sidney stands up, rubbing his ear. "Bitch."

He does end up taking his shower, the only other person in there is Pascal, who just smiles at him (while he stands there naked) and towels off. Sidney returns the smile and takes his own shower.

Everyone is basically gone by the time he gets out. Well except Pascal, who's parading around the place without clothes on.

He leans against Sidney's locker, satisfied look on his face."So.. like what you see?"

"Excuse me?" Sidney asks.

Pascal slaps him on the shoulder. "Just messing with you Sid. I know you like 'em Russian."

Pascal winks at Sidney before -skipping- away. Sidney shakes his head. Why couldn't he have been like.. given normal human beings for teammates?

As he carries his bag on his shoulder and walks out to his car, he wonders what it would be like on another team. What team would he even go to?

Obviously he would love nothing more than to stay in Pennsylvania. The Flyers are absolutely not an option. *sad face*

He wouldn't mind living in Chicago. Then he'd get to see Jonny and Kaner all the time!

But then that would mean he'd have to see Jonny and Kaner -all the time-. Not to mention that Jonny would force Sidney to room with him. (Who would be captain in that situation?)

He would move back to Canada, but none of the teams there are actually playing any good. So that's not an option.

Then he comes up with a brilliant idea that has his smiling as he texts Alex.

'what if I was drafted to the caps?'

He's still smiling and even laughing at himself a bit (honestly, he probably looks like one of these duranged, psychopathic lunatic/serial killer) as he gets in his Range Rover and drives (dangerously speeding, he's lucky he didn't run over someone's grandma or something) and gets home faster than usual.

Sidney isn't one for texting and driving (he is one for trying to crash his favorite car though). Once he's inside Alex calls him, Sidney picks it up and he's interrupted before he can even breath.

"Why would say such thing? Are they talk about trading you? Agent want new team, more press coverage?" Alex's voice is harsh and takes Sidney by surprise.

"Uh no." Sidney replies.

Alex sighs. "Okay. Then why ask?"

"Well I was just thinking about how my teammates are a bunch of dick holes. So I was wondering what team I would go to if I was to go to another team." Sidney explains as he flicks on his bedroom light. "I elimanted my first choices then it came down to your team and I kinda thought it was funny."

Alex chuckles at him. It's barely audible, but it's. there. So it's a victory.

"So, what would you do?"

Alex stays silent, the sound of his breathing the only noise he makes. "Would fuck you every night."

Sidney grips onto the phone tightly as a blush creeps all over his face. "I was talking about playing together genius. Not... that."

Alex groans. "Life doesn't revovle around hockey Sid."

Bullshit. "Well then what does it revolve around, oh Great One."

He can hear the grin on Alex's face. "What you wearing?"

Stupid question. "Uh.. pants, shirt.. You know ... basic human clothes."

Alex groans, loudly. "I meant specifics sweetheart."

Sidney blushes (he's an idiot). "Well... those pants I wore.. that night. Um, this really cute shirt, it's black, I like never wear it but I was kind of running out of time this morning. Oh and-"

"How can you be sexy person like you yet uncreative?" Alex's voice is strained like he's struggling not to laugh or something.

"I can be.. seductive." Sidney defends himself.

And there is the laugh. "Prove it and I kid no more tonight."

Sidney rolls his shoulders, taking in a deep breath and lowers the volume of his voice to a whisper and the pitch a little lower than usual. "I wish I could be wearing you right now."

Alex takes in a sharp breath. "Oh really?"

"I've always.. adored how you play on the ice. Always so fast, so quick." Sidney smiles at himself. "Promise you'll go slow on me okay. I want it to.. last as long as possible. I want to be shaking before I go over the edge."

Alex moans. "Make it last into next year if that what takes."   
(It's funny because the year started only a couple months ago.)

"I want to body check my dick into you. That alright?" Alex's voice waivers.

That actually sounds horrible and very, very painful and something Sidney never wants to experience. Ever. "Make sure you'll get suspended for it."

Alex moans again, this time much louder. "Sid, best boyfriend.. ever."

Sidney slowly sinks down to his bed, phone pressed to his ear. "B...B-boyfriend?"

"Yes?" He hears shuffling on the other end that has Sidney assuming Alex was laying down. "Do not.. consider us boyfriends?"

"Well.. we never technically.. talked about it." Sidney replies. "Geno said that you wanted to be.. or something like that. But we never officially talked about it."

"Zhenya talk to you about us?" Alex's voice raises slightly.

Sidney rolls his eyes, drama queen. "Well yeah. He's both of our friends and wanted to know we wouldn't hurt each other. So he kinda .. Y'know.. said things that showed you cared and.. stuff."

Sidney hears a loud thud and he grimaces. That would be kinda funny if he fell of something.

"Sorry. Dropped phone." Alex apologizes quickly. "Um.. that is good Zhenya say things um.. how about we Skype tomorrow talk about things in detail."

"Yeah sure."

Alex sighs. "So did you want to.. finish?"

"Well," Sidney drops his voice again. "Only if you want to."

Alex moans again, much softer and a little nervous.

They talk like that for another fifteen minutes. Sidney has no idea where any of that stuff came from. (And it's not like he -doesn't- know about sex. He went through school, had to endure sex ed. Not to mention he's a -guy- who has -guy- friends. It's really not that hard to figure out). After Alex.. masturbates or whatever, he seems a lot nicer, his voice soft and calm. It's really a surprising change from his usual cock, shit eating voice he's accustom to.

Sidney can get used to this. And he will.

And tomorrow morning, he can truly start. He can truly be him.

He prays that maybe Alex can do the same. Then again, his homeland won't find that as comforting as Canada will (or already does).m

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was meant to be funny and sexy (in ways only Sid can be). I'm sorry.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7:

The game against the Leafs was ... amusing. Sidney and Geno kept teasing them by suddenly slowing down, or coming to a complete stop, before sprinting off again. Even Colby was about to throw down his gloves at Sidney. He offered his former teammate and his first best friend an apologetic smile and Colby would understand.

Colby always does. He knows that sometimes Sidney needs to not only win, but enjoy himself. Especially during a hard time.

Everyone else on the team didn't understand him to well. Specifically Phil Kessel. Evey time the guy got on the ice the same time as Sidney, the captain was brought to the ice or slammed into the boards a little to excessively.

The game ended four to none. Nothing was going to end his happiness.

Colby pulled Sidney into a one arm hug and kissed the side of his temple Instead of giving him his handshake like a normal person.

Instead of going out and getting completely hammered, they stay in. It's a rare occasion. (Sidney isn't complaining. Everyone knows that he doesn't like to get drunk). He's more than surprised when everyone crams into his and Geno's room and looks at Sidney with impatient eyes.

"Boyfriend." Geno says.

Sidney rolls his eyes. "I told you that I don't have a boyfriend. Give it a rest."

Flower pulls Sidney down next to him. (Ugh. Flower is sitting on his bed.) "You are the worst liar in the history of life, Sid. You're not bullshitting us."

Sidney sighs. "Oh my god. Alex and I are not together yet. Jeez."

Geno flicks Sidney in the ear and crosses his arms over his chest. "No talk yet?"

"Yes we talked. But-"

"Wait. Alex who?" Flower asks, looking very interested in the conversation (this is an accomplishment because Flower isn't really interested in anything Sidney says unless it's his personal life, and until now Sidney never really had one).

Brooks dives onto Geno's bed and onto the Russian. "That would be funny if it was Ovechkin. Then you and Ovie can take Sid home and make him part of your secret Russian mafia or whatever." Brooks says as he pokes Geno in the side.

Sidney blushes brightly while Geno smirks at him like he's a fucking genius.

"Oh my god, it's Ovechkin, isn't it?" Flower asks, matching Geno's smirk.

After constant poking of his face and sides, Sidney caves. Confessing they are doing.. whatever it is they're doing. Making it very clear how it's not officially a relationship and not to tell anyone anything.

Then Sidney's laptop makes a sound. So Sidney picks it up and guess what! Alex is calling him on Skype. Just because they're a bunch of assholes, everyone starts making cooing noises and Flower steals away his laptop and answers it.

"Hi Ovie." Flower says.

Brooks and Kuni have Sidney restrained, but he can still see Alex's startled expression. "Hi Marc-Andre. Um.. is Sid there?"

Flower cocks his head to the side and offers a warm smile. "No need for the full name introductions. As Sid's soon-to-be husband, the team and I insist you call us by our nicknames. So please call me, Flower."

Alex looks truly uncomfortable and slightly scared. He does blush and smile, his voice cocky as ever. "I remember that for next time we play."

James looks over Flower's shoulder and offers the same smile as the goalie. "But if you even dare breaking Sid's precious little heart. We'll come down to whatever shit hole that you line in and rip out all of your organs, excluding the heart and brain. Then, we'll keep you on life support while we feed them to you. After that we'll cut you up and send you to your family piece by piece. So if you don't have some serious feelings for him or something, then you better back the fuck down, eh?"

Alex laughs. He looks a little frightened (but who wouldn't be?), but still like his usual self. "Wouldn't bother with him if I didn't already."

Sidney elbows Brooks in the guy (lightly) and snatches his laptop. "Leave."

Flower and James look very pleased with themselves as they join the shuffle of feet exiting the room. When the door is shut, Geno looks at him with a raised eyebrow before grabbing his things to take a shower.

"I'm sorry." Sidney says when they're alone.

Alex laughs, looking pleased. "Kidding me? Wish my teammates that protective."

That surprises Sidney. "I'm sure none of them have to worry about some girl ruining your entire life. And because you've probably had a lot of girlfriends and.. they aren't surprised to find out you actually have a life outside your profession."

"I only had one girlfriend, back when start in KHL. Was horrible, never do it again." Alex says, looking all to pleased with himself. "Does it bother you, me being with pretty girls?"

Yes, in every single way. "What? Of course not."

Alex gives him a goofy smile before making his face go all serious. "Can we have serious talk now?"

"Of course. What's wrong?"

Alex opens his mouth, letting it hang open before shutting it again. He does this for a few minutes before he sighs, rubbing his face. "Did you tell them.. I boyfriend?"

"No. Geno was trying pretty hard to make me though."

Geno (conveniently) walks out of the bathroom, wearing only his boxers and a smirk. Sidney just glares at him until Alex calls his attention.

"Thing is.. I have .. great feelings for you. Sure Zhenya already told you, because he is traitor." Alex scoffs.

Geno smiles, saying something in Russian.

Alex just rolls his eyes and turns the conversation back to him and Sidney. "I was wondering if.. you had.. wanted to tell them we.. together."

 

Sidney can't help the blush that appears on his face (or the fact that he feels like Taylor). "Yeah. Sure. I'd love to."

Geno kicks him in the shin and grins. "See. Now you have boyfriend."

"Oh my god, fuck you." Sidney kicks him back.

"Ow!" Geno complains, holding his knee. "Sanja, he kick me!"

"Call me immature." Alex scoffs, rolling his eyes and smiling. "I sit here, try to have normal, adult conversation. Then you two kick each other. Not very hard since both are whimps. But seriously."

Geno says something in Russian that makes Alex blush furiously and start spewing out a string of words that mush together and don't stop until the phrase does. Geno looks very happy with himself but says no more.

Sidney is offly confused. "What?"

Alex blushes even more and respons quickly. "Nothing."

Geno mouths 'tell you later' before laying down on his bed.

He is fed up with this already. "I am so going to learn Russian that way you two can't have secret conversations."

Alex is calm for the most part. "Then I can't talk about pretty face without you getting all.. blush." Alex smiles and starts to unbotton his shirt.

Geno rolls his eyes and shakes his head. "Such bullshit Sanja."

"Who invited you in conversation?" Alex asks.

Geno raises an eyebrow. "'Do I need to go to Flower?"

Ovie waggles his eyebrows, which makes Sidney blushes even more than he already was. "No." Sidney responds.

Alex frowns and his shoulders slump. "So disappointed Sid. We suppose to skype sex. Then you let Russian ass ruin it."

"That wasn't going to happen anyways."

Geno says something obnoxiously loud in his language, which leaves Sidney assuming is the Russian version of the word burn.

Alex spats something back before wishing Sidney a good night and sweet dreams. Sid finds his stomach fluttering as he says it back. They stare at each other for like five minutes before they end the call simultaneously.

"Love sick puppies. So gross." Geno says as he slips under his cover.

Sid mutters French cuss words toward his teammate as he enters the bathroom. The whole time he showers he smiles, and it doesn't go away until he sleeps.

That's when all the nightmares start.

××

Sidney is.. unusually hot. Especially since he's standing in the middle of the hockey rink wearing his practice gear. There isn't anybody in there. Not even Mario, Dan, or Geno (who often stays late with Sidney). No fans or press or photographers. Nobody.

When he calls out, he can't. His voice gets stuck in his lungs and a choking sound echos around the room. Sid blinks. He couldn't of made that sound, did he?

Then he hears a voice.

'Hey look! It's Cindy, the choking faggot!'

Sidney recognizes that voice from anywhere. Tod Blakely, his high school bully.

'Only my son gets to call me that.'

He tries to move toward the sound of his dad's voice, but his feet seem to be glued to the ice.

'Pictures have spread all over Twitter of you sitting in a bar kissing another man before abruptly leaving.'

'Cindy Crosby, the crybaby.'

'Take another dive, bitch.'

'You're not good enough. You never will be.'

All these insults get louder and louder, overlapping each other. Sidney croutches, covering his ears with his hands and squeezes his eyes shut.

They're not true, they're not true, he keeps telling himself.

They are true. Everyone is going to know, everyone will hate him.

××

When Sidney wakes up in the morning, Geno's sitting by his feet.

Geno holds out a cup of coffee. "Alright?"

Sidney sits up, taking the cup with a gracious nod. "Yes, just a bad dream."

"Normally get them when nervous too?" Geno asks, his eyes buldged with concern.

Sidney had no idea that Geno got nightmares, probably nothing like his. "Uh.. yeah. Yeah, I guess so."

Geno nods, looking down into his coffee. "Nervous about today then?"

"Yeah. Of course."

Geno nods, staring at the creamy liquid in his cup with the green ring around Geno's eyes slightly thicker than usual.

Sidney can't take it anymore. "Is there something wrong that you want to talk about?"

Geno's eyes flick up to look into Sidney's, biting his lip. "Uh.. well... um.. It's just that I'm." Sidney takes a drink of his heavenly liquid. "I'm uh.. bisexual. Right word, yes?"

Sidney swallows and clears his throat to keep from spraying it everywhere. "As in.. you like both male and female."

Geno nods. He looks so nervous, and scared. Really scared.

"Why.. Why are you telling me this now?" Sidney asks. "I mean, I'm glad that you did. But it seems kind of.. random."

Geno gives a half smile. "I know. You come out today. So I figure, if you need support. I help." Geno gulps. "And also.. you get involved with Sanja. So I also think, both are best friend. Can't live without either. Since I date Sanja before, I give you tips on him. You simple person, so I give tips on you. That way makes life easy for everyone."

"That's really considerate." Then it kind of smacks Sidney in the face. "Wait, you -dated- Ovie?"

Geno looks surprised. "Yes. Why does matter?"

"Why does it matter?" Sidney repeats using his proper English. "It matters because I would have liked to known that my best friend and my boyfriend dated before now. I would also like to know how long, when, why, and if it was serious."

Geno takes Sidney's cup, placing it down onto the bedside table before holding his captain's hands. "We dated back when I first join KHL. Ovie big star, was lucky. It was only year and half. Was mainly just about sex. Then I met Oksana and we stop." Geno rubs Sidney's knuckles. "Wasn't serious at all. Just attraction then. All feelings had then gone. No.. relationship chemisty. You two have.. good chemistry. Belong together."

Sidney blinks to try and clear the mist building in front of his eyes. "If you.. hadn't met Oksana, would you guys still be together?"

Geno chuckles at this. "No. He would dump me when first set eyes on you."

Sidney blushes. "Thank you for telling me that." Ugh, sappy relationship stuff. Ew. "So, you said you had tips."

Geno perks up, looking very excited. "Sanja.. he likes to spoil. Thinks that he must buy you things to make happy. Nothing to expensive, unless he really like you. Then you probably get car or house."

Sidney laughs. "For a special occasion? Or just because?"

"Just because."

Sidney sighs. "Great."

Geno smiles. "He also is really.. touchy. Especially in public."

Sidney rolls his eyes. "You act like I've never met Alex before."

Geno thinks this over before nodding. "He also really like pet name. Something unique, special. Makes him feel happy. Like inside joke."

Sidney is.. more than shocked by this. Is there a word for that?

"He also try to be very nice." Geno rolls his eyes. "Even if bad attempt. He have good heart."

Someone's phone starts to buzz, so they both grab them off the bedstand.

"Pat." Sidney greets his agent via his phone.

"You might want to get ready. Need you here in an hour." Pat replies.

Ugh. "Okay. See you soon."

He spends the next half hour getting dressed and begging Geno to kill him. The Russian was watching with fascination, constantly asking how Sidney could fit into tight pants with such a big ass. (And everytime Sidney would blush and complain that it's not -that big-. Which would just get him laughed at more.)

Around twelve thirty, he got to the Penguins' press conference room. Fifteen mimites early.

"Oh uh.. Hi Sidney. Wasn't expecting you so soon." Pat says, giving him a once over.

Sidney nods, because he knows. "Okay so, what's the game plan?"

Pat looks at him confused for a second before he remembers that Sidney is an interviewing robot and has to be told what he can or can not answer. "Well, we're going to have you go out there, explain what happened. You'll answer twenty questions. Preferably nothing about your family, life in Canada, Claude, and past or recent boyfriends. Okay?"

He can do this. "Okay."

"Great," Pat says. "So uh.. if you wanna get this over and done with, I'll go check if everyone is ready. Or you can just follow me around."

"As much as I love you Pat, I'd probably have a mental breakdown having to deal with your life, no offense."

Pat laughs calmly. "That's why I'm the agent and you're the robot. Because I could never do interviews like you do."

After a gentle pat of his client's cheek, Brisson disappears into another room. Leaving Sidney there, all alone. Nothing but a man and his overactice imagination.

Then Pat comes back two seconds later to practically drag Sidney into his chair and begin the interview.

Sidney takes in a deep breath. "Okay, so to begin I'd like to say that I will not be disclosing the other person in this photo's name, anything to include my parents, or anyone back in Canada." He tries to resist the urge to wipe his hands all over his pants. "Obviously the person leaving in the photo is.. me. And I'm very clearly kissing a man." He licks his lips. "My reasoning for this interview is to come out.. as being the only active homosexual NHL player currently." Now the hard part. "Any questions?"

Pretty much everyone stares at him in total shock, the only sound in the room being the flashes of the few cameras capturing the rare moment of silent reporters.

"Uh, I know you said that the name of the man in the photo." Brad says. "I was just wondering if you two are together or were at the time."

"No, we are not and were not."

"Do you generally meet random men in a bar and kiss them?" a burnette, Brazillian woman from CNN asks.

"That question is highly innapropriate." Sidney says. "And no. I never do that. It was a .. spur of the moment."

"How often do you hook up with strangers?" a guy with black hair from ESPN gives Sidney a flirty smile.

"Uh, no." He really hopes he isn't blushing.

The next seventeen questions are basically the same as the first three. It's really quite pathetic. They all probably thought up questions for him to deny it rather than confirm it.

When Pat finally ends it, Sidney lets out a sigh of relief. Brisson slaps him on the back and tells him how good he did. Then forces him into a meeting with the athority for the next two hours about how he'll have to present himself properly (it was really just Ray telling him how to act while Mario and Pat try not to laugh their asses off, and Dan.. he doodles on a piece of paper before throwing it at Ray, which angers him to a point where his face turns red).

He makes it back to the hotel without incident. Geno was laying on Sid's bed, watching some Russian war hero movie with tears in his eyes. He pulls Sidney onto the bed with him and cries on his captain's shoulder everytime someone dies and after it ends.

"Uh G?" Sidney asks when his shirt starts to feel wet.

Geno pulls back. His eyes puffy and the thin green ring expands a little. He licks his lips, opening his mouth a few times before he just closes it, looking into Sidney's eyes.

The door creaks open as the familiar smell of Chinese fills the room. Sidney turns his head, looking into Alex's eyes. They look shocked (and hurt?). Geno points to the TV as the name of the movie comes on and dissolves away.

Alex closes the door behind him, tight smile on his lips. "You watch without me?"

"Didn't know you were coming. Would've waited." Geno looks up at Alex innocently as he pulls Sidney closer to make room on the bed.

Alex rolls his eyes, placing the bag of food on the floor next to the bed before cuddling up it. He kisses Sidney gently on the forehead before laying on his shoulder.

"Don't you have a game tonight?" Sidney asks.

"No, we have night off. Fly back to D.C. in morning." Alex pokes Geno's red nose as the other Russian sniffles.

The trio end up watching a few action movies that Geno randomly decided to buy. Then there's two Russian movies, both romance. Then they end up watching the NHL highlights from the previous night.

"Look so good on ice, Sid." Geno says, poking Sidney's stomach.

Geno and Alex exchange a few words in Russian, probably aruging over something like idiots. Eventually, Geno throws his hands up in the air, saying a word that sounds insulting before going into the bathroom.

"You are definitely teaching me Russian so you two can't keep doing this to me." Sidney says. "That or I'll call Sasha and make up a new language to have secret conversations with."

Alex props himself up so he can look directly into Sidney's eyes. "Why does bother you?"

Sidney resists the need to flick him in the ear. "Obviously whatever you're saying is to important to be said in English. That or you just don't want me to hear it. So you're keeping secrets from me, and that's not a good way to start a relationship."

Alex smiles shyly, running a warm hand just under the hem of Sidney's shirt. "What is good way?"

Sidney blushes. "Ugh, stop trying to change the subject."

Alex pecks the tip of Sidney's nose. "Sorry." Ovie frowns. "I just tell Zhenya stop flirting with you. Don't like it."

That is easily the stupidest thing Sidney has ever heard in his life. There is absolutely no way in hell that his best friend ever flirted with him, especially now, since he's taken. It's just not humanly possible and therefore the subject is being changed.

"We should find Geno a mate."

Alex laughs hardly at his choice of wording (is that not what a life partner is for? to mate! come on people.). "Like who?"

"I don't know. What's his type?" Because you would know, he almost adds.

Alex thinks this over, "Mixture of you and me."

"Trying to be serious sweety." Sidney says, rolling his eyes.

Ovie looks offended, "I am! We do.. Twilight! You be Bella, I be Edward, he be Jacob. We make male Renesme. All is good."

"That's a deal."

Geno comes back in. He face is a little flustered and his mouth is in a thin line. He mumbles something in Russian before grabbing a white container out of the bag Ovie brought. Alex says something back that makes Geno smile. Sidney lets it slide because they need to have personal space (couldn't they have done it some other time).

The door busts open, an excited James Neal walks in, six pack in hand.

"Guess what sexy penguin was just on the television." James says. His eyes scan the couple on the bed. "Hi Ovie. How pleasant to see you."

Alex looks very uncomfortable. "Hello James."

Nealsy looks over the room. "Well, I wasn't aware that we could have open orgies while G stands in the corner eating Chinese." 

Geno blushes furiously, shifting his feet as he used his chopstick to pick up a very interesting looking noodle (it actually wasn't interesting, but G has the mind of a two year old so they pretend it is).

James flops down on Geno's bed, him and the Russian form this weird cuddling thing that looks a lot more like a couple of huddling penguins (no pun intended).

They watch Sidney on tv, well only James and Geno get to. Alex keeps poking Sidney everywhere, especially in his sides and stomach. He keeps swatting his hands away because Ovie keeps trying to get to his pants and there is no way that is going to happen (well, not at the moment).

"Mr. Crosby, what is your response on your son's coming out?"

Sidney snaps his head in the direction of the tv, his eyes starting to water. He's prayed every time he could that maybe he changed his mind. That maybe he could still have a family.

"I don't know what you're talking about. I don't have a son."

The reporter looks shocked and thoroughly confused. "Yes you do. NHL superstar Sid-"

"I know who you're talking about." Troy snaps. "You see, we are a devoted family, who love each other and God. We do not allow that kind of sin to run through us." Troy turns away to head to his house. "Now, if I ever see you here again I will call the police, understood?"

Sidney squeezes his eyes shut and buries his favd into Alex's chest. The Russian's hands rub small circles on his back, James says something comforting. Sidney doesn't listen. He just tunes out everything.

His realy family hates him. His own flesh and blood finds his way of life to be morally wrong. Like it was his choice to be like this. If it was, Sidney never would've chosen this life.

Or would he?

Sidney opens his eyes, looking up into those blue eyes that he's seen so many times before. Before, they've always just been his eyes, nothing special. But now, it's so different. Nothing has changed. Nothing has happened. Yet that empty feeling on his chest seems so much more filled. Not whole, but definitely occupied.

If he had been able to choose his sexuality, and he chose to be straight. Who would he be laying with? Would he be with anybody?

Would he even be a hockey player?

~

Alex ends up having to leave around ten, claiming to have a curfew or whatever. And since he couldn't really explain why he was in the same hotel as Sidney Crosby without stating the obvious, it was probably a good idea.

Still, he misses the warm body laying against his as he sleeps. Even though him and Geno do share the same bed. Sometimes they understand each other's pain without words (Sidney wasn't surprised when his friend crawled into his bed and muttered soothing things into his ear until his eyes fluttered shut).

It was like twelve hours ago when they woke up laying on each other. Now, they're suiting up for their final Canadian road game against the Canadiens. Sidney usually is nervous because of the game, but today, he's nervous for a different reason.

Well, he's holding a number 87 Sidney Lemieux jersey in his hands like it's holy grail (and it might as well be). And if he goes out there and plays poorly, he'll be insulting Mario's name, hia legacy. Not to mention Sidney's own future. It's already been damaged enough, the last thing he wants is to play like shit against the worst team in the NHL wearing the name of the second greatest hockey player in history. (Falling only slightly to Wayne Gretzky).

Staal and Flower slap him on the back after he puts it on. Scuderi makes a joke that now he can move back in considering he's officially part of the family.

Assholes.

Sidney moved out after his birthday. Nathalie had begged for him to stay. He would've moved out sooner, but she just wouldn't let him go. Turning 25 was the last straw for him, even if she wanted to wait until he turned 35.

Going out onto the ice, he's greeted with the roar of the crowd, which gets even louder when they show off his new jersey.

He's got this, he can do this.

~

Apparently Brendon Nash and Andrei Markov got really pissed off with the welcoming the crowd gave to Sidney. Everytime either one of them was on the ice, they charged right after him, knocking him down to the ice in a manner that really should have been a penalty.

By the third quarter, the game was scoreless and Sidney had taken half of the team's hits.

Sidney passed to James, and he put it past Carey Price.

All he remembers is raising his arms in victory before he gets knocked down and everything goes black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As Sidney said, we are going to find a mate for Geno. I'm really having a hard time narrowing it down to who I want it to be. Honestly, the scene I'm using for this person can really fit anyone.  
> Please, leave it in the comments on who you want it to be. (Not Sid, Alex, Semin, or Claude, just thought I'd say that). Majority rules.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8:

Jonny is really fucking pissed. He hates losing, hates losing at home, hates losing to the Red Wings. Bunch of fucking cheating pussies.

And he really fucking hates the reporters.

"Jonathan, can you tell us your opinion on Sidney Crosby coming out?"  
"Jonathan, do you consider Crosby a bad image for the LGBT community?"  
"Considering his recent actions, do you still consider Sidney Crosby a valued hockey player?"  
"Do you think his scandal is affecting his game?"  
"How does it feel having to play with a, quote from Crosby's own father, a 'queer'?"

The vein in Jonny's forehead pops out as he resists the urge to punch the reporter in the face, "How does it feel talking to one, shit face?"

Jonny pushes into the locker room. He ignores all the looks of shock as he changes and showers. He isn't in the mood to deal with this shit right now.

He's dressed in his street clothes in like ten minutes (which is like a record for him). All Jonny wants to do is leave, No more questions, no more accusations, no more hatred. He's done, done with it all.

"Jonny." Kaner's small, worried voice makes Jonny stop and face him, hands buried in his pockets.

" I know what you're going to say," Jonny begins his self rant, "What I did was stupid, reckless, careless. It was inappropriate as a captain, and I shouldn't have done it. Saying what I said was wrong, but I don't regret a damn word of it."

Kaner looks at him with those gorgeous eyes, peircing through Jonny with love and concern. Instead of speaking, Kaner cups Jonny's face and kisses him. Right there, in front of the team (and they just start clapping and hooting, Sharp even yells out 'Get it Pat!').

He doesn't think anything could dampen his mood.

That's until they all go over to Duncan Keith's house to watch the recap of that day's hockey games, just like always.

The Caps play a good game (2-1) against the Rangers. They cover the Blackhawk's loss. The Bruins blew out the Sharks. Tampa Bay actually had a decent game against the Kings, who are doing really good.

Then comes on the Penguins versus Canadiens game.

It's scoreless most of the game. Sidney (unsurprisingly) plays really well, has been all season. All his shots connect, absolutely gorgeous.

Five minutes left in the third quarter. Sidney makes one those beautiful shots to Evgeni that would make anyone swoon. Malkin taps it into the back of the net.

The whole team is so excited. Sidney is modest, throwing his arms up in the air and expecting a big group hug.

That is until Brendon Nash hits the puck and smacks Sidney directly in the face.

Jonny's air catches in his throat as he watches his best friend fall down and not get back up.

Evgeni is on the attack, pumbling Nash's face in. No one makes a move toward him. Neal skates over to Sidney, yelling at the paramedics to hurry up.

Montreal ends up winning two to one.

Jonny squeezes his eyes shut, burying his face into Kane's shoulder and willing himself not to cry.

"The faggot won't be sucking cock now, -eh-?" Nash spits into the reporter's face. Jonny looks up to watch the blood being dried off Brendon's nose before being forced into the medic's room.

Jonny presses his face into Kane's shoulder, taking in his lover's scent. It's the only thing keeping him strong, the only thing holding him together.

Sharp goes off into a rage about how bullshit all this is. That Nash should be in handcuffs and deported to a police station, not receiving medical treatment. He deserves to be punished severly. (If only they knew that a bunch of Russians were probably going to go end up murdering him slowly). And that Crosby may not be the most likable guy on the planet, but he didn't deserve that. No one does.

No one does.

...

Alex watches the recaps in utter horror. Sidney collapsing on the ground, not moving, barely breathing. He watches Zhenya beat the living shit out of Nash, something he would be doing himself if he could.

Instead, Alex grabs his phone, dialing Zhenya's number and trying to relearn how to breath.

"Sanja." Zhenya sounds exhausted.

Alex panics even more. "Is he okay?"

Zhenya sighs. "Yeah.. he's uh.. yeah. He's fine." He sounds struggled speaking his home language. "Concussion. He's done for the rest of the season and probably the beginning of the next."

"Fuck."

Zhenya's laugh is shaky and more of a painful release than anything, "I know. It's going to destroy him." He sniffles, probably rubbing his eyes. "He was so close Sanja. One more week and we'd be in the playoffs. He'd end his career high season with a long over due Cup. But now he has to spend it on the sidelines, and that's if he's allowed to get out of bed."

He can't take this. "You want me to come up there?"

"No," Zhenya resonds quickly. "I'm sure he wants to see you. But there isn't any point in trying to provoke anymore drama."

The tears start to well up in Alex's eyes, but he can't cry. He has to leave that to Zhenya, and potentially Sid. He has to be the strong one. "Okay well just.. keep me updated please."

"Of course."

Someone in the background yells Zhenya's name, probably the doctor or someone (please let it be the doctor). "Listen, I got to go. I will text you all information that I get the moment I can. I promise. Okay? I love you and I'll talk to you in the morning."

"Love you too."

Alex lets the phone drop onto his couch, covering his face into his hands. Exhaling and inhaling slowly, just like his mother taught him to do whenever he got upset and didn't want to lose control. It's effective. But nothing can heal a broken heart.

Except for the thing that broke it.

...

Geno stares at Sidney. His friend has never looked so small, so fragile. So -helpless-. It breaks his heart. Seeing him barely able to move, his mouth all but sewn shut.

All Sidney ever wanted to do was to win the Stanley Cup. To be up there with the all times greats like Wayne and Mario. So close, just a few weeks away. Then he'd be hoisting the holy grail above his head.

Instead he's laying on a hospital bed in Montreal and won't be playing for the rest of the season.

They can't do it without him. Not just because he's the captain, It's so much more than that.

Sidney is the Penguins' back bone. He supports them in everyway possible. He's always their shoulder to cry, their person to jump on. He's always there to pushes them harder, further than they'd ever go on their own.

Without him they lost a game in under four minutes. Imagine what it would be like a whole game without him.

Everyone says they want the Stanley Cup. Everyone does, it s a prestigous title to have. Just like a Super Bowl ring, a National Championship trophy, the FIFA World Cup. It's something you would like to have, but you'll live without it.

Sidney, on the other hand, needs it. He needs to feel the cool metal between his palms just like he needs air to breath. It's the only thing that will assure Sidney that it all hasn't been for nothing. That he hasn't suffered through all of this, lost his family and the respect of many, for nothing.

Geno feels like he let him down. Like he should've stepped in front of his captain and took the shot himself. Sidney wouldn't forgive him for that, but it should've been done.

It should've been him.

...

Sidney opens his eyes slowly. The room smells musty, like it hasn't been cleaned in ages. Sweat clings to his forehead, thin paper on his chest. The pillow underneath his head is unfluffed and hard. The sheets under his fingertips, rough.

He's in a hospital.

Memories flood back to him.

He remembers spending pretty much the whole day with Alex and Geno after his press conference. Then James comes in, they share Chinese until Alex has to leave and James practically passes out on Geno's bed.

Sidney remembers suiting up, playing the game against the Canadiens. He particularly remembers everyone being really pissed at him for no reason.

Then he runs over all the plays they made, ending with his pass to Geno which went into the net. Nothing comes after that. His mind draws a blank.

Weird, That's never happened.

Wait, why is he in a hospital?

Sidney turns his head poking a sleeping Geno in the face. The Russian groggily looks at him. Sidney tries to open his mouth to ask what happened, but the slight movement brings on a sharp pain to spread from his temple to the rest of his brain.

Geno stands up, spraying out fast Russian before nearly sprinting out of the room.

Sidney is confused, but he's also scared. Really scared.

The Russian comes back in a moment later, doctor in tow.

"Mr. Lemieux," Dr. Poligreno speaks with one of Jersey accents. "I am very sorry to inform you that you have a severe concussion. Before you ask, I'm expecting your returns to the ice to be at the start of the next season at the earliest."

Sidney groans, closing his eyes and hiding his face in his pillow. He really wants to be at home right now, laying in Alex's arms. Letting the sound of his voice just make the pain go away, make the bright light stop hurting so much.

"You can probably go home in a couple days," the doctor says, "but you'll have to ride on a special jet or something. Talk to make it as quiet and dark as possible."

Sidney just groans again. Words are to painful. There's no way he'll nod without making it worse. Obviously he can't just ignore the guy, that'd be rude. Believe it or not he was raised in a well mannered home. So a groan seems like a good response.

He hears some deep whispers and some shuffling. Geno sigh is frustrated.

"Mr. Malkin, you are more than able to stay with your partner past visiting hours, but he's not going to need you twenty-four seven," Dr. Poligreno asks, "I'm sure he'll be understanding if you go off and play, which you'll have to."

Sidney is about to get up and protest to the word 'partner', but the slightest movement of his head agonoizes him even more. And he's really surprised that Geno didn't make the correction. Something to talk about when the doctor leaves.

Geno sits down on the chair next to Sidney's bed. The red puffiness surrounding his eyes has dulled down a little, but you'd have to be blind not to see it. "Anything you need?"

"Why didn't you tell him we aren't partners?" Sidney asks before he can think about the consequences.

Geno gives a half hearted smile. "Listed me as next of kin, being 'just friends' not option on list. Obviously not relative. So was only choice."

Sidney has a funny thought. "We should tell Alex."

That was probably the lamest attempt at humor Sidney has ever had, but Geno finds it funny either way. Then again, Geno finds everything that's meant to be a joke. funny, so Sidney tells him that.

"I do not find everything funny," Geno objects. "I know you try, try hard. Know what you're trying to archive. So I laugh, make you smile. All matters."

Sidney is about to roll his eyes, but thankfully stops himself. He remembers the last concussion he had and he did that once. Easily the worst thing he's ever experienced (well, besides this).

Still, Geno looks troubled. Like he's having a mental battle with himself.

"G, what's wrong?"

Geno literally almost bursts into tears, very close to. But he does hold them back while he spends the next hour trying his hardest to explain how he wishes he stepped in front of Sidney and taken the puck to his head. And how this was supposed to be their year, the year they won the Cup. How they can't do it without Sidney being on the ice. Geno is so disappointed in himself, he takes all the blame.

Now it's Sidney's turn not to cry from both the pain and Geno's heartbreaking words. "Geno, don't you ever fucking say that again. There's nothing you could've or should've done."

Geno rubs his eyes, pulling out his phone. "Sanja pissed."

Sidney perks up at Alex's name. "You.. you talked to Alex? When?"

"Few hour ago." Geno yawns, trying to hide the small movement with his hand.

"We play the Kings next and then the Blackhawks before the season ends, right?" Sidney asks, "Well you should go back to the hotel and get packed wouldn't want to disappoint Brooks." (since Brooks is the favorite alternate captain that sort of makes him captain in Sidney's abscence).

Geno blushes, looking down at his phone. "They gave me 'A' too. Then everyone say they like me more."

Sidney smiles, or at least tries to. "That's good. You deserve it."

At that time a nurse comes in, hooking Sidney up to a bag thing while explaining that it's morphine. Then telling Geno that it will make Sidney sleep a lot and that he'd be totally fine to leave his partner in their capable hands.

Geno does get up, slowly and stiffly. "I win for you." He says before pressing a kiss to Sidney's forehead and disappearing.

"He's not actually my partner." Sidney tells the nurse.

She giggles, going slightly pink in the face, "I know. Not all the good ones are gay."

He wants to make the correction that they -are-. But he can't because Geno would probably be pissed and because she bounced off.

Women. No wonder he could never like them.

He lets his eyes slip close, his lids shading him from the harsh light. Sidney feels empty, like a piece of him has broken off and floated away. His chest is hollow and everything feels so.. so.. wrong.

He hasn't talked to Alex in at least twenty-four hours. Which is probably the longest time since their.. feelings or whatever came out.

It sucks, it really fucking sucks.

Sidney hasn't realized before how much of an impact that Alex has had on his life. How the silly texts, the meaningless phone calls, or the hours they'd spend on Skype talking about nothing important. It's amazing how you truly never know how good something is until it's gone.

And it's not technically.. gone. It's just unavailable at the moment. He'll have it back sooner or later.

He hopes it's a lot sooner rather than later.

It's really quite a shocking feeling to think that your views on people can change so quickly. A year ago, Alex was someone Sidney tolerated, for Geno. Merely an aquantince, nothing more. And Sidney was more or less convinced Ovie just liked making fun of him because it was so easy, or he tolerated Sidney for Geno as well. It's like the Russian was common ground.

Yet now, Alex is the only thing that matters to him. The only thing he can think of and the only thing he's going to think of.

He really hopes that maybe the concussion or something is really messing with his mind right now. Because thinking like this could be dangerous to everyone. Even it's about someone you lo-

Okay, he's not going there.

He tries thinking of happy thoughts that don't involve Alex. But there aren't any. So he lays there, imagining the breathing of the Russian hot against his neck and the warmth of his sleeping body encasing Sidney's. It's a soothing hallucination. Probably a little disturbing, but it puts him to sleep.

And it's not weird that he has a dream where he gets married in Moscow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry if this is weird, choppy or awkward. My mind has been.. wandering onto other much more important chapters. And I also wanted to do a little explaining.  
> For anyone who didn't get the picture. Nash hit the puck at Sidney's helmey, which led to his concussion. I couldn't think of a .. better thing than that. It was originally going to be the puck that broke his jaw. But then I decided a concussion would probably be better for the storyline. So, there was some adjusting.  
> Before writing this chapter, I realized I wasn't doing a lot of Jonny/Kaner in here. And I decided just to give him the spotlight. Then I decided to do the same with Alex and Geno just to lengthen this thing out and to spread out the horizon on people's hidden opinions and stuff. It's not going to happen often, but if I decided it's necesarry then I'll do it.  
> So about the whole Geno mate thing. I'm currently at a three way tie. Which isn't really helping. So I'm going to narrow it down to James, Tanger and Niklas.  
> I was originally going to do James. Because I love James and because he's fucking amazing.  
> Then I heard about that whole thing with Tanger and his stroke and I noticed that there were like five works on here for that couple, so I was at a struggle.  
> Then I was like 'Hey, it'd be awesome if he got a Russian to torture Sidney with even further'. But then I thought nah because I need some cultural differences in here. But I did feel bad.  
> So please please please PLEASE comment after you read this because then I'll have to spend like years trying to pick between them and then hate myself afterwards.  
> Omg, I am so sorry for how long this is. But I promise it was all completey necesarry for my survival. And I'm sorry for any mistakes and stuff I made because I didn't do a thorough check because I'm lazy.  
> So thank you and I shall let you leave.. after you comment.  
> -Candace


	9. Maybe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you can see from my tags, I've added two new couples. I totally forgot about Paulie.. You all have the right to kill me now.

Chapter 9:

Laying in his bed, Sidney is trying seriously hard not to bang his head on the wall. For whatever reason, he's not allowed to drive yet. So he has to wait for Alex to come back before they can go watch the Caps' game. It's been like an eternity and longer. What could be taking him so long?

Sidney resolves to laying on his stomach, cheek on the pillow while he waits for the Russian to appear somewhere.

"Uh Sid?"

He sits up, turning to face Alex. He has a.. big white box in his hand.

"What's that?" Sidney asks, chewing on the interior of his cheek.

Alex smiles, sitting on the foot of the bed, "Is for you."

Sidney gently takes the box in his hands, setting it on his lap. He really hopes that this isn't one of those random, fancy gifts that Alex likes to give.

He has to open it though. So he does. Peeling off the tape slowly before lifting the lid to look at the jersey.

Correction. Look at Alex's Washington Capitals jersey.

Alex bites his lip, looking at Sid expectantly.

He's at a loss for words. "I.. I.. Thank you." Sidney does the only thing he can think of. Which is kiss Alex's mouth.

Alex pulls apart first. "You like?"

Sidney smiles, pulling it out of the box. "I -love- it." He stops smiling, giving Alex an all-bussines look. "Why?"

The Russian looks at him puzzled as if he should already know. "Be easier to spot you."

Sidney slightly rolls his eyes. "Did you forget we're in D.C. and a bunch of people will be wearing your jersey?"

Alex offers a small smile. "No one in box will."

"Alex," Sidney whines. "We talked about this. My terms for going to your game are that I have to sit and the stands and I don't receive any special treatment that would make me noticable."

Alex grabs Sidney's hand. Massaging it with his light touch. "You know how loud crowds are. Concussion no like." He tapes his nogin for emphasis. "So we made special box. Noise, not as loud. Can see out, but cameras no see in. Perfect."

Sidney groans. This is why he hates Geno. He was -supposed- to fly back to Pittsburgh, spend the rest of his concussion in peace. Geno decides that 'bring him home' actually means 'change the flight to D.C. without telling him until we get to his boyfriend's house, then spring the news onto him and almost get Geno's face clawed off until Alex calmly kisses him on the mouth.. in public.. on his front porch.'

Then again, he'd be laying at home, not talking to anyone, not allowed to do anything if Geno hadn't brought him here.. Still. He should've been told.

Alex coaxes Sidney to put it on. He's very reluctant to do so. It's not that he wouldn't love to wear Alex's jersey any day of the week, but he's afraid of being asked about it. And Sidney's pretty sure that Alex is purposefully trying to get outed, so he's not going to keep his mouth shut (plus he likes to boast about everything). Not to mention he's being very pushy and persistent.

He slides into Alex's Mercedes SL65 AMG. It's a lot different than his own car. Which is probably just collecting dust on Sidney's drive way in Pitt. His poor baby. Apparently no one decided he might need it, or just want to look at it. So rude.

Alex is easily the most reckless driver Sidney has ever met in his life. He's trying not to, it's evident the way he blushes with embarrasment when he makes a sharp left turn.  
Sidney does feel bad, so he rests his hand on Alex's arm. "Geno's driving is a lot worse."

Alex holds in his laugh all the way until they arrive at the Verizon Center. Even then it's only a light chuckle.

Alex looks real nervous. Like someone who's about to head into battle. And maybe he is. It really depends on who they're playing. Sidney realizes with a shock that he doesn't know the opponent. Obviously it's meant to be a surprise since Alex didn't bother to tell him.

It's probably the Flyers. He brought him here to watch Alex beat down Sidney's rival team. That makes perfect sense.

~

Well it's a Pennsylvanian team. Just not the Flyers.

Geno pulls Sidney into a bone crushing hug. "Sid!"

"Oh my god, Sid! You fucking traitor." Flower says, patting the name Sidney's back.

Sidney glares at Alex. "It is so -not- my fault."

Alex just smiles with pride as he pries Geno off of his boyfriend, "Zhenya, going to kill him."

Geno puts his hand on his hips, looking Sidney over. "Flower right. Sid, big traitor."

"I am being forced to do this, thank you very much." Sidney retorts.

Paulie squeezes James's shoulder. "He almost looks as good as you do."

Sidney doesn't get it at first. The reason that Paulie would say that to him and then James would blush brightly.

Then he sees the romance hidden in their secret glance.

Oh.

Sidney decides not to say anything. If the team doesn't know (or they did and didn't tell him) it's not his place to say anything. So he lets Alex drag him out of the awkward huddle of Penguins toward his special room.

Sidney isn't one hundred percent sure that the box is actually.. custom made. And he highly doubts the company would put in extra money just to do something for a conference rival's concussed captain who's dating their captain. So he tells Alex that.

Alex rolls his eyes, making Sidney sit down before pressing a kiss on his lips. "If box is no safe, all over Twitter tomorrow."

He watches Ovie go. Sidney suddenly feels alone, empty. And he hates it. Like he -really- hates it. It feels like his whole world just walked away from him.

And in a way, it did.

~

The game ends up going into a shootout. Alex plays a really good game. He's always had fun playing against Zhenya. Mainly because Evgeni is really good, almost better than Alex himself (but not better than Sidney). They haven't played against each other since the KHL days. Alex isn't really complaining. He's just really impressed that Evgeni has improved so much since then.

When Zhenya asks to take Alex out for some drinks, he instantly declines. He can't just leave Sidney alone in his house.

"No it's fine." Sidney objects. He places a hand on Alex's chest before stretching up to whisper in his ear. "I'll wait up for you."

What he said really doesn't mean anything. Besides, Sidney isn't medically cleared for activities that intense (or at least the doctor never said, but he might be).

Alex can still imagine.

He eventually caves. There's no point in arguing with the two most stubborn people in the world.

It's not a big, fancy strip club like he's used to (plus Sidney would kill them both if he found out they went to one). Instead it's a simple bar. They go into a private room which is filled with a bunch of drunk NHL Russians, and J.P. Barry (Zhenya's agent).

Sasha, Nicklas, and Ilya are here. So he shouldn't let the sight of Evgeni's agent ruin the night.

Conversations are you know, normal, Russian, male stuff. Alex mainly shares a bottle of vodka with Evgeni and make random, rude comments (which are always hilarious, because he's hilarious) when he feels like it.

Zhenya gets really drunk. He's so plastered that Alex doesn't really care to listen to mumbling that he says to himself in their home language.

That is until he hears Sidney's name.

Evgeni plays with the liquid in his glass. "... Sidney is so.. perfect. He's beautiful. Lucky to be with. Sanja doesn't deserve him."

"Excuse me?" Alex snaps.

Evgeni turns to him, eyes wide and enraged. "You heard me. You don't deserve him. He can do so much fucking better." He snarls. "Sid dates horrible, scumbag of men. People like you and Claude. He goes for people who just want his body.. not.. not him."

That is a bunch of bullshit. "Don't you ever fucking say that again."

Evgeni gets up, balling his fist. "What you gonna do Sanja? Punch me. Go ahead p. Lets see how much Sid like you then."

Alex sighs, looking at his friend with sadness in his chest. "Zhenya, you know I don't fight men at their weakest."

The Penguin looks even more pissed, facing starting to turn red. "I am not weak! You don't fight for your own honor, how do you expect to protect his?" Evgeni spits in his face. "He's not taking this whole family rejection thing better than you think he is. Not to mention the concussion and not being able to play or do anything. It's fucking killing him. I'm surprised you haven't noticed."

Alex wipes the spit off with the sleeve of his sweat shirt. "I do fucking see how depressed he is. But you know what, at the end of the day, I make him happy. He lays in my arms in my bed. Not yours."

Evgeni snarls. "I bet if he knew I wanted him he would go with me." He smiles a little devishly. "How about I ask him with my tongue tomorrow."

Alex stands up, crowding his personal space. "You better not fucking touch him."

Zhenya pushes him, the bigger Russian only stumbling back a foot. "Try me."

He's had enough of this shit. He pushes back his friend (ex friend?), hard enough Evgeni has to grab the bar from a few seats down to steady himself.

They exchange a few punches, one splitting open Evgeni's lip, before they're being pulled apart. Sasha and Nick grabbed Alex's shoulder, pulling his into one corner, while Ilya and Nabokov pull Evgeni over to the other side of the room.

"What is wrong with you two?" Sasha asks, clearly trying not to punch Alex himself.

Alex exhales harshly. "Personal shit."

Nick rolls his eyes. "Does it have to do with the new Lemieux?"

He pretends he has no idea what he's talking about. But Nick just rolls his eyes again before explaining to Alex he saw them kiss and that Sid was wearing his jersey, blah blah blah, he tried not to puke, blah blah blah.

Sasha flicks him in the ear as Alex watches Ilya haul Evgeni out of the room and probably out of the club.

Then J.P. heads his way.

"How dare you touch Evgeni in such a violent manner!" J.P.'s face is redder than Evgeni's was. "Now he's going to have an unexplainable split lip thanks to your actions."

Alex relaxes, making his teammates relax too. It was enough of an escape for him to break free and punch J.P. in the jaw.

The agent stumbles back, holding his face, his eyes wide in utter shock.

"Maybe you should ask your client what -really- happened." Alex snarls.

J.P. practically runs out of there, still clutching his jaw like it's a life or death situation.

This time Sasha doesn't hesitate slapping him and giving Alex a lecture about manners that would make his mother swoon.

"You gotta stop this man," Nick says as he drives Alex home. "I don't know your relationship with Lemieux or anything. So I'm not going to tell you what to do. Plus I'm not Sasha and your still my captain." If only Sasha knew that. "But you have to quit being so defensive over him. I'm sure he's capable of handling himself."

Alex sighs. "I know. The things Evgeni said were.. innapropriate and very rude." Alex shrugs as Nik parks in the driveway. "It's just that.. Sidney is my everything. I love him. And I just.. don't like people talking about him behind his back. Especially when someone who knows me better than anyone calls me a scumbag, saying I don't care about him."

Nik's mouth hangs open. "Who are you and what have you done with Ovie?"

Alex rolls his eyes, "Trying to be serious Niklas."

"Yes, I know. Now stop, I don't like it."

He sighs, rubbing his hand on the side of his face before grabbing the doorhandle. "Night Nik."

Nik squeezes Alex's shoulder. "Night Ovie. You better be back to your old self by tomorrow's game."

Alex shuts the door quietly before walking up to his house and unlocking the door.

The light in the living room is on, but no Sidney to be found. Turning off the light, he heads up stairs, carefully trying not to wobble.

When he does manage to get into the room without hurting himself, he finds Sidney laying on the bed reading one of his romantic French novels.

"Hey." Sidney says, putting the bookmark on his place before setting the book on the night stand.

Alex takes off his sweat shirt, exposing his bare chest as he throws the gray material on the ground. "Hey."

Sidney looks at his lap, an obvious blush creeping over his face. "Did you have a good night?"

Alex shrugs. "Good as night can be with drunk Russians," He sits on the bed, getting as close to Sidney as possible. "Did you have good night?"

Sidney blushes even more, "Well I mean ... it was lonely and stuff. But I kept telling myself you know .. that we um .. need to .. spend some time apart every now and then." He clearly looks nervous. "Because, you know .. it's not .. healthy for a relationship to be um, inseperable. So uh, as long as your out. And I'll be able to go out eventually. So um .. that'll be good for us." Sidney opens his mouth to babble on some more, but Alex presses nd index finger on it.

"Calm down, take breath, relax." Alex orders. "Now tell me what you trying to say."

Sidney searches Alex's eyes for.. whatever. Before placing a cautious hand on the Russian's chest. "Do .. do .. do you um .. want me?" He licks his lips, looking even more nervous than before. "Like.. uh.. sexually."

Alex tries really hard not to smile, but totally fails. "Wouldn't be here if didn't."

Sidney nods like he expected that answer from him. He bites his lip, pulling back his hand and letting it fall on his own lap.

Alex watches in -- shock? amusement? he can't quite decide -- as Sidney has a mental battle with himself. After a few minutes of conversing with his conscience, he makes up a decision.

Sidney mumbles something to himself before turning toward him.

The Canadian cups Alex's cheek, bringing their lips together for the most intense kiss that they've ever shared.

It's awkward. And it really shouldn't be sexy. Yet it is. He wants more, more than usual.

Maybe Evgeni has a point.

Sidney never saw Evgeni's flirting attempts. Never saw how the other Russian watched him with such longing, whether it was on or off the ice.

Sid had never realized any of that. Maybe he would be with Evgeni instead of Alex..

Then again, Alex wanted Sid first. Has wanted him since he first saw him when the Canadian was only eighteen and about to enter the NHL draft.

It's taken seven years, but he finally has what he's always wanted. Evgeni would never take this away from him.

Or would he?

When Sidney pulls away, he looks star struck. His lips a little puffy that just gets worse when he bites the bottom one. "When you.. get back from Pittsburgh, okay?"

Alex squeezes his hand, "Whenever you want is fine for me."

Sidney nods. He still looks incredibly nervous, but whatever battle he's having with himself is obvious to personal to share, "So how's Geno?"

Alex's stomach twists into knots and his chest aches. He can't lie to Sid, he won't. "Very drunk."

Sidney rests his head on Alex's shoulder. "And how are we?"

"We do good." The Russian replies. "Is nice to spend lots of time with you. Bad situation, but is still good."

The Canadian nods, placing a small kiss on Alex's pale skin. "Maybe I could come to Pittsburgh with you. That way we can go out without it being .. noticable."

Alex really should say no. It'll be bad enough having to see Evgeni after that .. scene, him being there would be worse. After seeing the pleading in his partner's eyes, he can't say no. "Can ride plane with team! Then we have big Cap-Pen playoff party at house. Will be good."

Sidney rolls his eyes, giving off a small smile. "No alcohol. I will not let a bunch of drunken, sex deprived hockey players anywhere near my house."

Alex runs his fingertips down the front of Sid's jersey. "I buy Sid jersey, you wear this. We go out, make out during movie, dinner. Will be great."

"Are you trying to get outed?" Sid asks.

Alex smirks. "Maybe."

Sidney flicks his earlobe. "We will go out. But we'll do normal, guy things. You know, things that friends do."

"Friends don't kiss each other Sid."

Sidney rolls his eyes. "And none of that will be happening then either."

Alex slides down so he's on his back instead of resting against the head board. He uses arm to shield his eyes. "So unfair Sid. Can't look at you."

Alex feels the smaller man's head on his chest and an arm wrapped around his stomach. The Russian opens his eyes to find the room dark and his lover looking up at him.

"Sorry, the light was starting to hurt."

The words were simple and meaningless, but it filled his heart with.. such pure happiness. Happiness that only Sidney gave him. A feeling that nobody will be able to give him again. Losing Sidney is something he can't handle, he won't let it happen.

No matter what, he won't let his much smaller lover go into the arms of another man. Especially not Evgeni. Even if the cost was his longest and greatest friendship, he wouldn't let Sidney go.

He waited to long, watched from the side line. He kept lying to himself. Saying that Sid wouldn't feel the same, that he'd never have a chance with him. But Sidney does want Alex, almost as much as Alex wanted Sidney.

"Everything will be okay if for you."

Alex doesn't know where the words came from or how he almost performed a perfect sentence, but it happened. Making Sidney blush before laying his head all the way down.

The Russian breathed calm and steady, making himself relax. When Sidney's soft breathing increases a little in volume, Alex lets out a sigh of relief.

It's always been his goal to protect the ones he loves. More specifically, Sidney and Evgeni. He's always done everything he can to help them.

What does he do when the two people he loves the most have to be seperated and it's all his fault?

Maybe .. Maybe Evgeni does deserve Sidney. Maybe Alex should let him go. Zhenya would make him happier.

Maybe he really should.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so when I began writing this, I was basing all the rosters off of the 2009/2010 season. But then like half way through this chapter, I realized that I totally forgot about to Olympics was supposed to happen in 2010 and I was totally going to make that into a chapter, and doing the one. in 2014 would've been to late. So yeah..  
> I know the rosters are not the 2008/2009 rosters, and yes the Pens did win the Cup in that season. But you all love me so you shall understand and forgive me for my major booboo.

.

Chapter 10:

When Sidney wakes up in the morning, the area next to him is cold and empty. Slowly, he gets up. Wandering over to the bathroom, pressing his ear up against the door.  
He hears the shower water.

Okay, so that eliminates the option that Alex had snuck out on him in the middle of the night.

Hm, it's seventy-thirty. Alex is never up this early. Unless Sidney wakes him up of course.

He's a little alarmed, but he's not going to intrude on his shower just to question his tactics.

Instead, Sidney strips down to his boxers and starts rummaging through Alex's closet for something suitable to wear. In the end, it'll probably end up being nothing because his boyfriend has the absolute worst taste in clothes that he's ever seen.

He settles on a pair of Hollister sweatpants that are to long but are okay because they're soft and chusiony and make his ass look good (and he totally did not spend ten minutes trying to look at it in Alex's body length mirror).  
After totally not doing anything, he goes back to looking for a shirt.

He doesn't find anything because he's dating the single person who doesn't own a normal piece of clothing that isn't a neon color or has some stupid logo on it that makes no sense.

Sidney decides on putting the jersey back on and heading downstairs to make coffee.

Then he gets really scared.

The coffee is already made.

He should be grateful, he really should. Except for the fact that Alex doesn't really know how to use his coffee maker and it takes him like an hour just to make a single cup.

With a little more energy than when he woke up, he bounces up the stairs. Sidney has no reason to be panicking, he doesn't. Alex just finally took the time to use his simple coffee maker to help Sid.. relax. To wake up with a fresh cup of Joe and a freshly showered man in the morning.

Still, he does go up stairs with his heart fluttering more than what it should.

Well it's understandable when he opens the door to walk in on Alex wearing only his towel that hangs loosely on his hips.

Sidney licks his lips, shutting the door gently behind him. "Are um.. you-you okay?"

Alex smiles that one special grin that shows the gap and the whiteness of his teeth very well. "Why would I not be?"

Sidney blushes even more than he already was as he watches a shed of water trail down Alex's chest and stomach. "Because you um.. you made coffee. And... and you um... were up before me." He sighs. "I know I probably sound uh... uh stupid and stuff but I um.."

Alex rolls his eyes, grabbing Sid by the shoulders. "Could no sleep and you make coffee yesterday never turn off." He cocks his head to the side. "Why so nervous?"

Sidney licks his lips again, giving Alex a very obvious once over before blushing even more. Ovie just gives him a shit eating smirk, getting as close as possible without actually touching.

"Like it when I only wear towel?" Alex's accent is heavy, deep with sexual hunger. His eyes cloud to a dark shade, hands running down Sidney's sides before resting just underneath his shirt. "Want me take it off?"

Sidney looks down as he blushes brightly, shifting nervously under his gaze. "We'll I'd .. uh .. much rather you not."

When Sid actually gets the nerve to look back up, Alex looks a little disappointed. But mostly hurt. And it breaks Sid's heart.

"It's not that I don't want you, I do .. It's just .. I'm not ready." Sidney tries to explain, but he totally fails because Alex looks even more sad. "Look um .. tonight. Okay? Tonight I promise."

Ovie sighs, muttering something in Russian that Sidney assumes is agreement. The older man's phone starts to ring, so he tosses it at Sid before going into the bathroom.

"Hello." He greets, not checking the caller ID.

"Sidney?" Nicklas Bäckström's voice sounds very shocked from the other end. "Uh .. hey .. is Alex there?"

"Yeah. He's uh in the bathroom." So awkward. He really hopes his team knows. "Do you.. um.. want me to deliver a message?"

Bäckström laughs, well sort of. "Sure.. Can you tell to be at airport by one p.m." He laughs a little more this time. "Make sure to say p.m., not make him think a.m. ... again."

Sidney smiles, "Yeah sure. We'll be there. Bye."

"Uh bye."

He gently places the phone on the bedstand (just because Alex has no disregard for his personal properties doesn't mean Sid will do the same).

"Who was it?" Alex asks, emerging from the bathroom in only his boxers.

Sidney was trying not to stare. "Uh.. Nicklas... He wanted me to tell you that we have to be at the airport at one p.m."

Alex rolls his eyes, grabbing Sid's hips. "Could skip.."

Sidney pushes him lightly, just as the headache starts. "No we're not skipping." He sits down on the bed. "I need to lay down, got get ready. Wake me up when. we need to leave."

Alex looks genuinely concerned. "Don't have to come."  
Sidney rolls his eyes. "Be worse if I didn't."

Ovie nods, placing a kiss on the top of Sid's head before doing as he's told (for once).

Slowly, gingerly, Sidney lays on his side. As of late, his headaches haven't been that bad. Compared to last time, he'd definitely say there's been a change.

Well, there's been a change in scenery.

He highly doubts that Alex could make a difference in his health.

Then again, he hasn't had a single nightmare when sleeping in the Russian's arm.

Hm, he thinks as he closes his eyes, maybe there's something else to this love thing.

~

Alex is pretty swift when it comes to packing. He doesn't really have much of anything that would cause a giant mess. But he doesn't really spend much time in his house before now. It was either they were on the road, or during the summer he went to Russia, he really only stayed in his house when he had someone to join him.

Well, now he has Sidney. So he kind of has to.

It's just .. for how long? How long will Sidney be there? That question keeps mocking him, teasing him from the back of his mind.

Then he hears Zhenya. His former best friend yelling at him that he's not good enough, that he doesn't deserve what he has. How Evgeni would be so much better than him.

And he has a point. Evgeni knows Sidney better, is around him all the time. They play on the same hockey team for fuck's sake! Sid's first and only love will always have anything to do with the ice.

Sure, Alex plays too. But not with him. He doesn't get to see him do his pre-game ritual, doesn't get to spend nights with him on the road. Doesn't get to share the winning goal, celebrate another hat trick. And he'll never get the chance to help him lift the Cup over his head.

Damn. What he wouldn't give to be a Penguin.

He's had that thought before. And it's not -just- because of Sidney.

They're a great team. He knows this. Right now they're falling apart without Sidney (who wouldn't when they lose their captain? well except the Caps.. but that's a different story). That doesn't destroy the legacy they've built since the young Canadian's first game.

Plus, he's heard they're pretty hilarious.

Alex sighs to himself, venturing up the stairs to retrieve his lover. He stops at the doorframe though, eyes watching Sidney sleep peacefully.

Alex has a random thought about whether or not Sid was one of those people eho falls asleep directly after sex. He really hopes not because he .. likes to cuddle. Plus Zhenya always fell asleep right afterwards and the last thing he wants is anymore similarities between the two.

With careful, easy movements he tip toed to the bed, sitting down at the foot of it. And just watched.

Sidney's chest moved up and down steadily. His face relaxes to a point where it's emotionless and the crinkles in his forehead disappears. It's an amazing thing really.How sleeping always helps the soul.

Then the smaller man wakes up, sitting up quickly. His eyes frantically searches the room before falling upon Alex. He looks so relieved, throwing his arms around the Russian's shoulders and practically pulling the larger man on top of him (not that Alex would've minded).

"Sid?" Alex's voice is muffled from Sidney's shoulder.

Apparently his message was sent through, because Sid releases him with an apologetic smile.

"Want to tell me what about?" Alex asks.

Sidney looks down, embarrased. "Uh .. no .. not really." His eyes look a little watery. "It was .. um .. just a bad dream."

Alex wraps his fingers around Sid's right ankle, a light touch traveling up the pale calf. "Bad dream don't make you act like that."

The Canadian looks up at him sheepishly. "It's .. um .. It's nothing .. Just happy to see you're still here and all of this." He gestures to the room around him. "Hasn't just been the best dream of my life."

"Be better with hockey."

The way Sidney looks at him makes Alex think that he hasn't really thought about that part much.

Sidney licks his lips. "Um .. when we go to Pitt today .. will you .. It'll just be us, right? No one else coming to crash out party?"

Alex smiles. "I beat everyone who come over." He pauses. "Except Mario. No hit future father-in-law."

Sidney blushes, wiping his face nervously and checking the time. "So we have .. like .. a whole hour left. What do you want to do?"

They both look at each other with devilish grins on their faces before racing to the stairs.

Like a couple idiots, they spent ten minutes deciding on who gets to be who and how Sid doesn't like Princess Peach because she has sucky cars. Then Alex would throw in the arguement about how he's Mario and Sidney is his princess. Which would just leave to more arguing about how Sidney is -not- at all a princess.

Okay, it can't be this difficult to play Mario Kart.

~

The next hour rolls around quickly. With them complaining about how the other is definitely cheating and that it's a bunch of bullshit (which generally ends with Alex kissing Sid until he's breathless).

Alex insists on loading -all- the lugage into the car by himself. "Going to exert lot of energy tonight save for now."

Then Sidney blushes brightly and keeps his protests quiet.  
The Caps are a .. rambunctious group. Definitely not something he's used to.

The Pens are hilarious, and they care about each other. They all could've just rejected Sid, tolerated him only for the game. Yet now, they are so much closer than before. And he doesn't have to pretend with them anymore.

On the other hand, the Caps give Alex a harsh, judgemental look when he walks up with Sid.

Matt Bradley looks particularly pissed off, "What the hell is the faggot doing here?"

Alex approaches him with such hostility that Sidney was expecting a fight to break out.

"Ever say that again, I break face. Okay?" Alex threatens, intwining his fingers with Sid's.

Bradley puts his hands up in the air, a way of waving the white flag. "Sorry man. Didn't know."

Alex squeezes his shoulder and practically drags Sid to the plane, carrying their bags in his free hand.

"Sidney!" Sasha yells, throwing his arms around Sid's neck to force him into a hug.

Ovie rolls his eyes, kicking Sasha in the shin.

Semin hisses something at Alex in Russian but does let him go. But then Nicklas starts hugging Sid in his place.  
Alex throws his hands up in the air, yelling something in his language before getting on the plane by himself.

Sidney has to pry himself away from Alex's friends. Who had started talking to each other while nearly suffocating him.

Ovie had decided to take the window seat leaving Sidney to sit on his left with an extra seat.

Alex grabs his hand the moment he sits down, frowning. "I'm sorry about that."

Sidney rolls his eyes. "It's okay. I like Nick and Sasha."

Alex gives him a youve-got-to-be-kidding-me look. "I meant.. Matt. He mean, rude. Say .. bad things."

He gives Ovie's hand a squeeze. "He's hardly the first person to say it to me and he's not going to be the last." He smiles at himself. "At least he didn't call me Cindy."

Alex looks furious. "Who say that? Tell me and I slow kill them. Trust me, I Russian I can."

"Oh my god. No." Sidney objects. "Look, it doesn't matter what people say about .. our .. sexual orientation aslong as you're with someone you love."

Alex calms down, a lot, "You with someone you love?"

Sidney smiles gently. "Wouldn't be here if I didn't."

Ovie grins, cupping the smaller man's face and kissing him.

Someone scoffs from beside them.

"Not time Nick." Alex growls.

Nick puts a hand on Sid's back, making the Canadian jump. "Not mean to intrude. Just wondering when is my turn."

Sidney blushes brightly as Alex gives him a death glare.  
"Not sharing." Alex says.

Nick laughs, rubbing small circles on Sid's lower back. "Not fair Alex. Always get good ones."

Ovie loosens up after that, a small on his lips. "Always come to late."

Bäckström pulls his hand back, so Sid takes the opportunity to sit back. But then he just starts rubbing his thigh, murming things in Swedish.

Apparently, Alex finds it acceptable for his teammate to molest his leg.

"So, how is Evgeni?" Nick asks.

"Oh uh, Geno is great. Or, the last time I talked to him he was." Sidney replies.

Alex's eyes go cold with hatred. That's odd. Him and Geno (Zhenya to him) have always been the best of friends.

Bäckström and Ovie are (obviously) keeping a secret from him by the way they're looking at each other.

"Okay," Sidney is fed up with the secrets. "If you two are going to do this .. weird yet totally adorable teammate connection thing I will get off this plane right now."

Nick just smiles at him, pulling his hand away, "No reason to leave,"

Alex's face would say a different story, but he doesn't object.

Freaks, Sidney thinks as they take off.

~

Most of the flight was pretty normal. He got a few odd glances his way, but it's nothing he didn't already expect.  
Well, that is until Alex falls asleep on him and Bäckström goes back to molesting his thigh.

"Does this no bother you?" Nicklas asks eventually.

Sid shrugs. "Well .. uh .. kind of, but it's fine."

Nick looks pleased. "Waited for Alex punch me in face. See if he do it or not."

That actually sounds like a very dumb thing to do, so Sidney tells him that.

Nick gives a soft chuckle. "True it is," he agrees. "But Alex knows I don't have feelings for you. Someone else you're both very close to. But not you."

Uh.. okay? "That's um .. nice to know."

Nick smiles like he's accomplished his goal and made what he was saying very clear. Thankfully he keeps his hands to himself the rest of the ride.

~

The ride isn't really that long. (seriously, how could Alex have fallen asleep and woken up like nothing happened in that short amount of time.)

Anyways, Sidney has to shield himself as much as possible. The next to last thing he wants is to get seen by the photographers exiting a plane with the whole Caps roster. (The worst being caught with Alex and have no way of denying what is the obvious.)

They go out to this nice deli that Sid is absolutely in love with and because no one ever notices him there. Which is a good thing because Alex keeps playing footsie with him.

After that, they go site seeing. Well, it's mainly just Sidney showing Alex the best looking places and Ovie just looks on with amusement as he claims that Sid is the best thing to look at on this world. (And then he blushes like crazy).

It's a nice evening really. Minus the couples times he has to stop Alex from grabbing his hand or kissing him (though he does end up accomplishing one of each. just a quick brush of the lips and intwining pinkies). 

They get to his house as night starts to fall. Sidney's intentions were to have a nice, quiet night offwith Alex. Helping him get pumped up for tomorrow's game while making his house feel all warm and cozy.

He did in no way, shape, or form expect to be pushed up against the wall the moment the door closed behind them.

It's not like he could object or anything (not that he wants to). Because Alex has his tongue in his mouth, hands pinning his hips against the cold, white surface of the wall, and crotch pressed against his.

When the grinding starts, Sid gasps, causing Alex to pull away. "Sorry, to much?"

He shakes his head, a small, insignificant throbing pain forming on the spot where he was hit. Sid forgets about it as Alex devours his mouth again.

It's different from the first time. No longer that hungry, desperate kiss that just got out everything he's been holding back. Instead it's passionate with an intense amount longing.

Sidney runs his hands up under Alex's shirt, feeling the warm flesh beneath it. Ovie takes a tiny step back, shedding the material before reaching out and doing Sid's as well.

They only take a couple seconds to admire each other before they start kissing. They take small awkward steps toward the stairs before deciding their pants didn't need to come up there with them. And their socks because that would be weird to still have them on.

To ensure Sid's safety, they don't kiss up the stairs, nope. Instead Alex decides to carry him all honeymoon style to 'save time' or whatever stupid excuse he mumbles because it's a mixture of poor English and Russian and he can't decifer exactly what he's saying.

When Alex gently places him on the bed, it sort of starts to hit Sid what's happening. Propped up on his elbows, Sid watches him pull out the lube and condom out of his bag, as if he planned it on purpose (or he assumed that Sidney didn't have any (which he'd be wrong, he does have some, for you know visitors) and brought it along just in case).

Alex kisses him again, this time fierce as if to distract him from the obvious sound of the bottle opening.

Sidney breathes heavily as he allows Alex to position them properly. He watches in slight horror as the Russian is about to put some on his fingers, but stops and looks at him nervously.

"Is .. to much?" Alex asks, biting his bottom lip.

Sidney starts biting his lip as well (maybe it's contagious?). "No it's just that I've .. uh .. I've never done this before."

He sort of expects that to just be like a major buzz kill or something. Instead, Alex grins.

"Go slower then." Alex whispers, pressing his lips on Sid's forehead before putting the lube on his fingers.

He may or may not be about to have a heart attack. His heart is beating furiously and he's pretty sure he's sweating badly, or he feels like it anyway. Instinctively, his body tightens up, prepared to take any possible hit.

(Okay, so he can possibly find a way to connect this to hockey. Nice.)

The first finger is not as like, life endingly painful as he assumed it'd be. It still burns like holy hell and feels so incredibly uncomfortable.

Alex waits (what Sid assumes) to be longer than what he usually would, awaiting confirmation or whatever, before slipping in the second.

Sidney tries to breath in and out. Thinking that this isn't going to be the last time they do this. So he might as well try and find his comfortable place as Alex's fingers stretch him open.

When the third finger slips in, Sid lets out an awkward sounding, high pitched moan, which actually came out more as a squeak. But it leaves a small simper on Alex's lips.

Ovie's fingers pick up a general pace, leaving both their cocks aching more, "Is.. Is enough?"

Sidney nods his head once, that small throbing pain from before lighting up his head for just a second afore going away as quickly as it came.

Immediately upon pulling out, Sidney feel hollow and empty. He watches Alex slip on the condom with such ease, it makes him wonder how many times his lover has done this same thing to someone else.

Alex climbs on top of him again, restraddling himself so they're in a comfortable position as he slips a pillow under Sid's hips. "Wouldn't want to break hip first time."

Yeah .. that totally makes sense. Especially when Alex holds him firmly down onto the pillow as he slides himself in.

If he was about to have a heart attack because of his fingers, Sid is about to have like a nervous breakdown times fifty.

Still, as he lets himself relax and Alex takes his sweet time thrusting in, it's not as bad. It still hurts, like your first bodycheck or first punch to the face. But he'll get used to this.

Apparently, he has absolutely no control of his mouth whatsoever. Because he keeps moaning (this time like a natural person would) ridiculously loud, shouting Alex's name as the Russian's teeth graze his collar bone and his adam's apple.

Then Alex hits his prostate and Sid flips shit.

He squeaks again, this time his back arching up. Ovie finds this to be hilarious, or so he guesses from the hot breath of his laugh on Sid's skin.

Everytime Alex thrusts into him, it's more of a light tap than what it's supposed to be.

And Sidney wants so much more.

"Al.. Alex H-h-hard.. harder." Sidney pants.

Alex brings up a thumb to wipe Sid's sweaty hair off his forehead as he slams into him.

This makes a combination of the weird squeaky sound and a deep whine sort of .. jump out of his throat. And it continues to adjust until it's a full out moan.

"Sid .. Sid p-p-please. If you don't I'm gonna.." Alex pants.

Sidney takes the opportunity to let himself go (because he's been putting it off for a while) just as Alex does. He orgasms with a jerky movement before just letting his whole body slump on the bed.

Alex pulls out, and again he feels abandoned. But it's not like they could just lay there covered in come.

Or maybe they can?

"Cuddle now, shower later," Alex explains as he. sets them up into a perfect cuddling position.

Sidney snuggled into the crook of his neck and just listened to his lover's breathing, "Anything past an hour will be gross." Or so his teammates have said before.

As if he had summoned them telepathically, Sid's house phone that he keeps on the bedstand when he doesn't have his actual phone, starts to ring.

With a groan he answers it, "What do you want Paulie?"

"Hey, no need to get snappy with me because you aren't getting laid." Paulie says sassily.

"As a matter of fact I am get-" Sid stops himself, "What do you need Paulie, or else I'm hanging up."

Martin laughs. "Sid the Kid isn't a kid anymore."

He rolls his eyes. "Hanging up in five, four, three-"

"Okay, okay." Paulie caves. "So um. We know you and your boytoy are hiding in your lover's shack across the street from your parents' house. But the team wants to hang out with him. Y'know, get to know him as your lover instead of a rival opponent."

Sidney sighs, "Okay, let me asks him." He muffles the speaker of the phone into his shoulder. "Is it okay if we go hang out with my loser teammates?"

Alex's face goes pale (well paler) but he smirks. "Can't be worse than mine."

"Yes they are." Sidney puts the phone back on his ear, "Yeah we'll be there. When and where?"

~

Since it's only two thirty-seven by the time the call ends, and they don't have to be at Fleury's until five. They end up laying in bed for nearly two hours before finally giving into the smell and the stickyness of the situation before caving into taking a joint shower. (Where Sidney kept trying to actually clean them both off and Alex kept kissing him.)

Alex is also very stubborn about putting clothes on too. Claiming he doesn't "need them". Then Sidney just throws something decent at him and pretty much has to force them on the larger man.

Of course, Ovie wants to drive as well. Sidney is more than capable of driving his own practical, normal, unsporty car just a few miles. But Alex won't budge.

"Want to show off you beauty along with car beauty." Alex explains, opening the passenger side.

With a bright blush, Sidney sits down with no further complaints.

Well, except his god awful driving. Which has, surprisingly, gotten worse since he doesn't know the roads.

James and Paulie are sitting on the front porch of Flower's house. Holding hands and whispering things into each other's ears with big grins on their faces.

"Ugh," Sid complains. "You two are disgusting."

Paulie jumps up, pulling Sid into a bone crushing embrace. He was waiting for it to happen. Martin loves hungs.

When he hugs Alex the same way though, he's almost as caught off guard as the one getting hugged. The Russian looks bewildered, but he throws his arms around the smaller man and goes along with it.

"Sorry Sid," James says, hugging his captain, "He's happy."

"No that is exstatic," Sidney says as Paulie practically jumps in place, "What'd you do to him Lazy?"

"Everything." Paulie says, grinning like a big, dopey idiot.

Alex looks at Sid like he's so lost and confused. Sidney rolls his eyes and shrugs before grabbing Alex's hand and pulling him inside.

"Sid!" Kuni yells, throwing an arm across his captain's shoulders.

"Hello Alex," Flower says, doing the same to the Russian, "I think we have some talking to do."

Alex looks at Sid, eyes a little wide.

"Told you mine were worse." Sidney points out.

Flower chuckles as he pulls Alex into the kitchen and Kuni pulls Sid outside.

"What do you mean we're worse?" Kuni asks.

Sidney shakes off Chris's arm to receive hugs from Tanger, Brooks, Max (why is he here? seriously, it's like he's still a Penguin), and Geno (who hugs him longer than usual).

"Well uh, you guys are .. very protective. Plus you intervene in everyone's love lives." Sidney tries to explain. "And his are a bunch of jackasses who don't really give a shit."

"Why what did they do to you?" Max asks, handing Sid a plastic red cup filled with lemonade.

Sid shrugs, taking a sip. "Bradley called me a faggot."

Geno chokes on the lemonade in his mouth. "Where he live? Beat shit out of him."

Sid rolls his eyes. "No, no. It's fine."

They end up spending the next half hour coming up with ideas on how to torture Bradley where it would last and slowly end his life. (Which mainly consists of Geno giving off random, Russian punishments for things like treason and murder while Sidney stands there wondering why him).

"Geno," Sidney places his hand on his arm. "It's really okay. You don't have to do that."

Geno places a hand on Sid's hip. Looking down into his eyes, his eyes darker than he's ever seen.

"Besides, you'll have plenty of time to do that on the ice tomorrow." Flower says, slapping Geno on the back.

Alex stands beside the goalie. His face pale and he looks absolutely terrified. Now Sid's scared to find out what happened in such a short amount of time.

"Give him a talking to?" Kuni asks, a stupid smirk on his face.

Flower looks very pleased with himself. "Well, he certainly understands us now."

Sidney takes his eyes off Alex for a moment to look at Geno.

In simple terms, he looks pissed.

"Hey Flower! Tell James that he is Lazy!" Paulie jogs up to them.

James follows a few feet behind. Very obviously failng at the simple task. "I am .. -not- .. lazy."

Flower steps out of his space between the two Russians to grab James by the shoulders.

"You are lazy because you rely on your natural good looks to find you a girlfriend rather than taking the time to go and find one." Flower explains.

Paulie looks a little hurt, but keeps smiling. Sidney opens his mouth to say something, but closes it immediately.

They didn't tell the team. Oh.

Alex just looks at him confused (and still fearing his life). Sidney shakes his head, placing a hand on his chest in an attempt to bring him closer.

Ovie gets it, because he does come closer. Placing a hesitant hand on Sid's hip.

"I'm sure whatever Flower said he didn't mean it." Sid says.

Alex smiles. "When goalie able to corner you and scare you, then he mean it."

"He cornered you?" Sidney can't help but laugh.

"Hey," Alex says, "just because I big, strong Russian man, doesn't mean I handle Penguin goalie. He scary."

"Sanja, can you come here." Geno's voice sounds rough and more of a growl than anything else.

Alex's back straightens up, but he gives Sid's cheek a peck and goes over there.

Sid tries to listen to the arguement going on between Paulie and Nealsy (technically isn't it a lover's quarrel?). But his attention keeps adverting over the heating conversation between Geno and Alex.

Pretty much everyone's attention adverts over to them when Geno screams in Russian, getting in Alex's face. Then he brings up the fist and punches his best friend in the nose.

Everyone runs over there. Flower and Tanger grab Geno's shoulders, holding back the protesting Russian. Sidney jogs over to Alex, who stands there holding his nose.

"Baby, are you okay?" Sidney asks, heart racing a million miles per hour.

Alex smirks at him, uncovering his nose. "Still pretty?"

Sidney flicks him in the ear. "Trying to be serious," Sid puts a hand on his shoulder. "Tell me what happened."

"What the hell is going on?" Duper asks, for once having a serious expression on his face.

And if you can get -Pascal Dupius- to be serious for more than five seconds, shit just got real.

"Geno punched Ovie." Paulie says, rolling his eyes as James imitates the motion.

"He punch my agent." Geno explains.

Sidney looks up at Alex. Who just looks even more pissed off.

"Really? How about the part where you try to get me to break up with Sid?" Alex snaps.

Sidney whips around, causing his head to throb and his world to slightly tilt.

"What?" Sidney asks.

Geno slumps, looking defeated. "He no deserve you Sid."

"Hey um, how about you guys head inside and look after the kids?" Duper asks.

Everyone does as he says (which is almost as surprising as the whole situation it's self because no one ever listens to him)-

"I no able to see you two together. Make heart ache." Geno explains, grabbing Sidney by the hips. "Sid, I-I-I-I love you."

"Oh my god. No you don't. Don't.. don't say that." Sid's head starts to hurt as he clings onto Geno to stop feeling so dizzy.

Apparently the need to be able to stand was taken as a gesture to bring him closer. Because that's what Geno does.

"Yes.. Yes I do. Mean every word." Geno whispers.

Sidney watches in utter horror as Geno closes the space between their lips. His whole body freezes upon the touch and he doesn't even move after it's over.

"S-Sid?" Alex's voice makes Sid snap to reality and turn around.

His boyfriend stands there. Hands shoved deep into his pockets and he looks as nervous as hell.

In other words, he looks exactly the same as the first time they met.

Sidney was being forced by Mario to meet some of the other new prospects coming into NHL along with him. A nice way to know his competition.

And the one that stood out was Alexander Ovechkin.

He wasn't loud mouthed and cocky as he is now. Nope. He stood out because he was standing there awkwardly with his hands deep in his jean pockets.

Exactly as Sidney was.

Now, standing there four years later, Sidney thinks about how far his life has come. And how it's all gone wrong, yet so perfectly right.

He turns back around, "Geno. You are. my friend, my -best- friend. And I know one day that you'll find someone who will love you with all their heart and will accept you for all you've got." Sidney tries to sort of smile in an apologetic way, "But that person isn't going to be me. I.. I can't love you when I'm in love with somebody else. I'm sorry."

Geno takes a step back, hands trembling. "You let him ruin what perfect future we have?"

Sidney sighs. "Even if he wasn't here I couldn't never have those kinds of feelings toward you Geno. I love you, but in a brotherly way."

Geno grabs Sid's hands. "Please don't say that."

Sidney loosens the grip and takes a step back. "Geno, just stop. It wouldn't work out between us. And there isn't anything you can do or say to change that."

Geno runs a hand through his hair, wiping the tears falling down his cheeks as he hangs his head. "If .. if ever change mind. I always love you."

Sidney turns around, the ground underneath him spinning. Alex grips his elbows to keep him upright. "Just.. Just take me home."

Ovie does as he says, holding him until he's seated in the car.

Neither of them speak on the ride home. Sidney stares out the window as a few tears slide down from his eyes and Alex is focused on the rode. He only makes one sharp turn the whole time.

Back in Sid's house, Alex doesn't meet his gaze. Instead he wordlessly sits on the couch and fiddles on his phone.

After about ten minutes of Sidney sitting next to him on the couch, bouncing his leg like he always does when he's really pissed off. He gives up.

Sidney takes the phone out of Alex's hands and tosses it on the table.

"We are. going to fucking talk and we're going to do it now." Sidney commands.

Alex sighs. "What you want me say?"

"Why the fuck didn't you tell me all this happened?" It really would've been the easier thing to do than have all of -that- happen.

"Not my place for me to tell you his feeling. That his job and I no need to tell you that about other man." Alex explains.

"As my -boyfriend- you need to communicate to me when you think we're having problems. And this qualifies as a major problem." Sid points out.

Alex looks crushed. "This is not problem. Zhenya he .. do this all time. Alway want what I have or someone he no able to get. Unlike me, he no really love you. He say things to get with you." He frowns, "unless.. Unless you -want- to be with him.. Then I understand."

Sid feels his heart stop for like a second. "Of course I don't want that." He rests his forehead on the palm of his hand when a stabbing pain ripples through his brain.

He hears Alex's breath hitch. "But .. but .. he so much more attractive than me. Would be better for you because you .. you play on same team. Get to see you more."

Sidney snaps his head up, which makes it worse. "I don't care about appearances. But you look a lot better than he does." He bites his lip hesitantly, before deciding to fuck it. "Alex. I -love- you. Whether we move somewhere to get married or we just stay partners, I'm going to spend the rest of my life with you. And nothing is ever going to change that." He wipes the tear that falls down Alex's cheek. "When I said that the greatest dream of my life would be spending it with you, I wasn't even thinking about hockey. Sure, it would be nice to play together. But as long as I know that at the end of the day you're still mine, then that's all I want."

Alex brings up a shaky hand, resting it on Sid's cheek. "I love you too, have for while. But .. Zhenya is right .. I no deserve you, can do better."

Sidney leans into the touch, "You're.. you're everything I want."

Alex nods, tears coming out in full stream. "I love you.. so much."

Sidney barely has time to say it back before Alex presses their lips together. It's sort of like the first one from earlier. Desperate, but slow and delicate.

All they do that night is kiss a lot. Alex doesn't want to push it. Besides, they have a life time to do whatever they want."

xxx

Evgeni unlocks the door to his house and closes it with excessive force. It's bad enough that Sidney turned him down, for Sanja of all people. But it happened in front of -everyone-. Now they all know.

Fucking great.

It's all fucking Ovie's fault. Having to take Sidney away from him, for being so fucking heartless. For always getting whatever and whoever he wanted.

He's not the one who fucking hid in a bathroom in a dirty airport just to sneak into America to play with Sidney. Alex left being it got tough, leaving Evgeni behind to deal with his own problems.

God, he fucking hates him.

During his mental battle, Evgeni doesn't see Nicklas Bäckström sitting on his couch until he's standing right in front of him.

"Uh ..Hi Nicklas." Evgeni says.

Nicklas makes a clucking sound with his tongue. "Please call me Nick."

Evgeni doesn't get to see Nicklas -- Nick, whatever -- very often, but when he does. It always makes him ache with longing. "Nick, why here?"

Nick stands up so he's crowding Evgeni's personal space. "'You know why."

Nick leans in, kissing Evgeni slowly. He brushes his cold fingers on the pale flesh underneath the Russian's blue shirt.

When the break for air, Evgeni grabs the Swede's hand and pulls him toward the bedroom. The only thing he thinks about is that it's been a while since he's enjoyed another man's company.  
.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Because I probably have some sort of mental problem that makes me do weird things, I made a Facebook page for Crovechkin!  
> It all really started as a Fandom dispute between my sister and I (where she likes Sid/Geno and I like Sid/Alex). She'd always say something about my hundreds of attractive Sid pics and then I'd say 'yeah, Alex is a lucky guy'. Then we'd just get into it by ending it with'Crovechkin forever'. After that we had a hashtag dispute, with ending with me saying #Crovechkingforever.  
> Then I thought of this page, because there isn't really a lot of Crovechkin anywhere but on this site. And whenever anyone actually has a fic list of them, it only contains things from this site. So yeah.  
> (This is also why you don't leave me alone in a room with nothing but my tablet for almost two days)  
> Anyways, here is the link and I will leave you to keep reading now .. I'm sorry for taking up so much time.
> 
> https://m.facebook.com/Crovechkinforever?_e_pi_=7%2CPAGE_ID10%2C2017197149

Chapter 11:

Jonny laid on his bed, curled in a ball, and all alone. He hated losing period. But losing to the Stars at home was a whole different thing.

With Sidney coming out, and Jonny following not long after, they were entitled the pioneers of the gay community. (Obviously Sid never knew. that because he doesn't read Deadspin on a daily basis like Jonny does).

Then the younger Canadian got a concussion due to some very homophobic shit. Nash was slapped with a five million dollar fine and suspended for the rest of the regular season and the post season.

While some said it was a bit to much for what he did. Most said it was justification for such acts. Whether gay or straight it was very innapropriate and could've ended such a young and talented man's career before he reached his full potential.

A few people said it was all bullshit. That he should've been arrested or suspended indefinitely. (Or both). That the punishment he got was nowhere near equal to what he did to Sidney.

Those people left Sid's legacy and everything he stood for riding on Jonny's shoulders. And he failed. He failed when it mattered the most.

Jonny left the locker room without talking to anyone. Even Kaner. He highly doubt that his fuck buddy would want to deal with him right now anyways.

When him and Patrick has first .. slept together. Jonny had assumed that (after talking out their feelings for each other) they were dating.

Then one night in Minnesota, Jonny told Patrick that he loved him. And Kaner flipped shit.

He yelled at Jonny, telling him that they were only fucking each other. That whatever 'relationship' he thought they had was just based on how good Jonny was to fuck.

Which that led to Toews slapping Kaner in the face before spending the night crying in his hotel bedroom.

Him and Patrick haven't talked much since that happened last week. And all the seperation was killing him. He loves Patrick, but he'd pretend he didn't if it meant being with him again.

A loud knock echos through his empty house. He's startled because no one would dare bother him, especially not this late in the night.

With a heavy heart, he trudges down the stairs and to the door. He swings it open and is confronted by the face of his ex-lover.

"What the hell do you want?" Jonny scowls.

Patrick looks fucked up. His eyes a little pink and sad. Hair pointing in different directions. The clothes he's wearing. if look wrinkled, like he threw them on in a rush. His bottom lip is red and swollen.

To Jonny, he looks perfect.

"I .. I came here to apologize." Kaner says.

Jonny crosses his arms in front of his chest and raises an eyebrow.

"Look," Patrick begins, "I shouldn't of freaked out on you like that. You told me how you felt and I wasn't prepared for that. I also wasn't prepared for .. me .. to feel the same."

"Patrick-"

Kaner shakes his head, "Jonathan, I love you. I realize that now. And if .. if .. you don't want to be with me, for real this time, I understand."

Jonny's eyes start to water, so he pulls Kaner inside. "I love you so much."

Toews presses Patrick against the wall, devouring his mouth slowly, taking his time.

They stood there, memorizing every inch of each other's mouth until they had to breath. Even after they broke, they just stared into the other's eyes.

"So," Kaner says, "partners for life?"

Jonny grins out of pure happiness, "Or until Chicago allows us to get married."

Patrick giggles, "I'm sure they will when I come out."

They stand there for a moment. Giggling for no real reason while refilling their lungs with oxygen.

The moment is so perfect. Because they're perfect for each other, and they'll never forget that.

...

Evgeni's shoulders slump in defeat. They just lost the series against the Caps 4-3. It's a heart breaking loss. He knows he's disappointed, the whole team is.

The Capitals are mostly on cloud nine. They're going to be playing against the Stars for the Cup. Well, Nick is upset. He wanted Geno to play in for the trophy almost as much as he wanted it for himself.

Despite all this, no one looks more depressed than Alex.

Sure, he wants his boyfriend's team to play in for the Cup. Evgeni is slightly happy because his is. Nevertheless, Alex is probably going to win the Stanley mother fucking Cup! He should be running rampade and celebrating like a lunatic.

During the handshakes, he mutters his apologizes toward each individual Penguin, even pulling Evgeni in for a one arm hug.

"So sorry Zhenya, for everything," he had whispered before pulling away.

It made Evgeni realize how much he missed his awkward and cocky best friend. And that this petty fight over Sidney wasn't worth losing the greatest human being to ever walk on the Earth.

Evgeni stalls in the locker room. Taking his time showering and changing before forcing himself to leave. 

To be completely honest, they weren't playing their best tonight. A critic on Deadspin had posted an article claiming that the Penguins were better off without Sidney. Just look at all the progress they've made, and no one has yet to even find the new Lemieux at any of their practices, or even their games. Malkin was doing such a good job as captain, they don't need Sidney.

In spirit of their real captain, they sort of .. slacked off. In the first quarter, it was a little obvious what they were doing. By the end of the second, it was very clear to the whole team that they wanted to lose for Sidney. Not even Dan yelled at them for it, which was surprising on all levels.

In the third, it was a mad rush to prevent the Caps from scoring, it worked. But the game still ended one to none.

Evgeni really didn't want to go back to the hotel. He didn't want to deal with anyone, especially the media.

No, he wants his boyfriend. So he goes to his house.

Listening to his GPS's very precise instructions, he pulls into Nick's driveway to find the lights already on.

Evgeni barely makes it to the front door before Nick pulls him inside, crashing their lips together and forcing the Russian up against the door.

He likes being dominated, loved it when Bäckström had forced him to do whatever it is he wanted Evgeni to do.

He's also into those deep, dark sexual fantasies. And so is Nick.

Sure, he's not Sidney. But he's a close second.

...

James took Paul in his arms, breathing in the scent of his older lover's cologne. He doesn't really understand what the problem is. They've lost before. Hell, they've gone to the playoffs every year since they adopted Sid and haven't gone to the Stanley Cup game once. It stings, but it's not a new experience.

And not one that would make Paulie act like this.

"Babe," James whispers, "what's wrong?"

Paul sniffles, leaning back to look up at Nealer, "I just .. I .. I don't want to talk about it." He looks down at their feet, taking a step back and turning from the Canadian to unlock his hotel room door and step inside.

James follows him inside, trying hard not to slam the door behind him, "Paul, we need to talk about this."

Paulie turns around looking him in the eye, "What do you want me to say? Hell .. Why do you even care?"

James rolls his eyes, "As your boyfriend it's my responsibility to care-"

Paul's eyes go wide, "B-boyfriend?"

"Uh yeah," James returns, "What else are we calling this?"

Martin stares at him dumbfound, then his face splits into a large grin.

Paulie cups James's face, bringing him down that short inch for a passionate kiss. No longer than sex craving make out they've shared before. One. that feels so much better, leaving them wanting more but completely satisfied with what they have.

James never does actually finds out what's bothering his lover. Just lets himself be dragged to one of the double beds and laid down without much force.

They cuddled as close as possible while watching The Big Bang Theory. Nealer has absolutely no idea what's going on, but Paulie seems invested in it, and that's all that really matters.

During one commercial, Paulie turns so they can see each other's faces.

"You know, we're gonna have to thank Sid big time for ... all of this." Paulie points out.

The day after Sid came out, Paulie had let it slip that he's gay too while being totally hammered and falling over James (who was equally as drunk). One thing led to another, and they just continued their little routine (while being sober and only after wins). Never deciding to really talk about it. Just spend so much time together that they know every little quirk they have and every detail about each other's lives.

"Yeah, we'll give him a blow job the next time we see him." James responds.

Paul makes that oh so adorable giggle every time someone talks about something sexual, "Then Ovie would probably end up punching you in the face."

"Why would he just punch me?" James asks.

Martin rolls his eyes, "Come on, do you think anyone could punch -this- face?"

James smiles, "Well I would punch them for even thinking of such an act."

Paul giggles again. So James presses their lips together, close mouth and soft. The American rests a hand on James's chest. The moment is so perfect, nothing could ruin it.

Well, except for Paulie's roommate walking in.

"Paul-ie! Sup man! I brought-" Flower freezes a couple feet in front of the bed, a six pack of beer in his right hand, "What the fucking hell?"

James's blood runs cold and his face pales, "Marc .. Marc this is um-"

Flower puts up a hand, "Whoa man. Calm your nips." The goalie grins and cocks head to the side, "Why didn't you guys tell us? I'm sure Sid would be more than pleased to know."

The look Paulie and James share is one that tells Flower he already does know.

Flower rolls his eyes, "Lazy, you're rooming with Vitale, right? I'll just go cramp his style then."

"Just um .. uh .. don't tell them." James. says in a rush, Paulie pokes him in the stomach, "Well we're going to .. uh .. at the start of the regular season .. So Sid will be there."

Flower flicks James in the ear before heading out the door, mumbling to himself in French.

Paulie looks up at him through squinted eyes, handing reaching in James's jeans and boxers to grab his limp dick way to roughly.

"You are a -horrible- boyfriend." Paul says, jacking him off.

James whimpers once, morphing into a moan that's muffled by the impact of the American's lips on his.

So he lied, this is the perfect moment that can't be ruined.

(Unless Flower walks in again .. then there would be some problems)

~

Sidney watched the Stanley Cup series in his special box when they played in Washington, or sitting on Alex's couch back in his enormous, empty mansion.

They started out great. The Caps whipped Dallas the first three games, the series starting three to none. Just one more game.

Something must have gone horribly wrong during the off day between game three and game four. Because the Stars raped them, five nothing.

Alex was on the road so he compromised to Skyping Sidney, looking very blank as he does.

"Baby, what's wrong?" Sidney asks.

Alex just shakes his head, "Nothing."

Sid rolls his eyes at the lack of emotion in his voice. "You know I hate it when you lie to me."

The corner of Alex's mouth turn down, the only show of life he's given in the past ten minutes, "Why you call me liar when I not?"

"Because it's pretty obvious that something is bothering you, and I just want to know what's wrong." Sidney says.

Alex bites his lip, eyes flicking to something off in the distance before resting on Sid again, "I love you."

Sid blushes, "I love you too sweety."

The corners of Alex's mouth turns up, the only emotion he's shown in the past five minutes. "Glad to know what not change now I loser."

"What? You're not a loser." Sid says.

Alex rolls his eyes, "I won every game since you move in. Now I lost, make me loser."

Sidney really wants to stroke his face, "We all lose games. It's not going to change my opinion on you, ever."

Alex nods, "Want to spend time with you always."

"I know," Sidney agrees, "It's really gonna suck next season when I start to play again."

Alex thinks this over for a minute, "Wish I could play with you."

Sidney has a totally outrageous thought pop into his brain, "That would be so amazing if we play for the same team."

"What would you do?" Alex asks.

"What, if you got traded to Pittsburgh?" Sidney asks for clarification. He laughs a little as Alex nods. "Well, considering that is highly unlikely and completely Impossible. That would be like heaven on Earth, for both our game and our personal lives."

Alex grins, "Impossible?"

"The Caps would never release you, let alone trade you to us." Sid points out.

Still, Alex looks optimistic. "Just have to wait until contract is up then."

"Yeah, sure. That's not for another couple years, right?" Sid asks.

Alex smirks, "Right."

~

The Caps end up losing the next three games in a row. Crowning the Dallas Stars as the new Stanley Cup champions.

Alex looks upset as he walks in the mansion. Luggage occupying both of his hands that Sidney takes instantly into the bedroom and places them on the floor beside before going back downstairs.

Sid comes back into the living room to find Alex on the couch playing on his phone. He hasn't seen the Russian since they played game five in D.C., but even then they really talk much.

Now apparently isn't any different. So Sid takes a seat on the other end of couch, curls into a ball with a notebook, and busies himself with making a list of what needs to be done around the house.

His biggest concern is the lack of furnishing that Alex has. The mansion has five bedrooms (a master and four guests) that contain only a king size bed and an empty closet.

So he focuses on making those a more homey. Then decides that they should probably change on of those to a nursery. Which leads him to adding strollers, bibs, cribs, and diapers to the list. After thinking it over he decides to underline the word diapers.

"What do we need those for?" Alex asks from where he had moved closer to Sid. (Wow, he must be like a stealthy ninja because he never felt the couch move.)

"For our kids." Sidney replies.

Ovie's eyes widden a little, "Don't know how that possible. Last time I check you no have vagina. Unless I need check again."

Sid rolls his eyes, "There's this thing called adoption, you know."

"Only twenty-five Sid. No need to think about kids now." Alex points out.

Sidney grabs his hand, "I just like to be prepared."

Ovie's lips brush on Sid's forehead, trace of a smile on his lips.

...

Alex looks down at Sid, the younger man holding his hand firmly. Hearing him talk about children sent a wave of fear through his chest.

It's not like he can say he wouldn't love to have a little Ovechkin and Lemieux playing shinny with make shift hockey sticks while wearing their dad's jerseys in the smallest size they can make. That would be a lie. He would love nothing more than to see the adoring look in Sidney's gorgeous hazel eyes as he gazes down at the new born in his arms and hums a sweet lullaby.

Adoption is dangerous. Even after they retire and move to .. somewhere safe and secluded. It's not like Alex could just come out. He's from -Russia- for fuck's sake. They've all but outlawed homosexuality (though they probably will pretty soon). Just imagine what his country would do to him, how bad the rejection would burn.

Okay, so maybe Alex is being a -little- bit of a hypocrite. He was unintentionally trying to get outed (he wasn't trying! honestly. it all just sort of .. happened. plus he's impulsive and does .. stuff.).

Adopting children would be a whole different story though. There are many ways that you could cover up a leaked picture or a story on Deadspin, but you can't cover up adoption papers. Not to mention that a person has to come evaluate your house, lifestyle, and whatever else is necesarry to be a sufficient parent.

Not that Alex wouldn't risk going through all of that for Sidney, the man he loves, because he would. He just doesn't want to put his parents, his family, Zhenya, or any of his closest friends through all of that. That wouldn't be fair just for him to be happy.

Sid's fingers trail down Alex's chest, "Why are staring at me like that?"

Alex smiles, "Because you beautiful."

Sidney blushes brightly. Closing the space between them, hand wrapped around Alex's neck.

All he can do is pull the younger man closer and give him what he wants. That's all he can really do for the time being, until things work itself out and he can give him the world.

Maybe the rest of his life will do.

The pull up Netflix on Alex's PlayStation, putting on a random movie that Sidney picks because it has Denzel Washington in it (who is literally his favorite actor). The Canadian sits in Alex's lap, heading laying in the crook of his neck while he watches the screen with no interest. Alex just plays with his hair and skin, feeling everything that wouldn't be distractive or suggestive in any way, while taking in his scent. Memorizing it so that he'd have something to hold onto if their fate forced them into different directions, even if for a short period of time.

They both sort of slip into unconsciousness, fading in and out as the warmth of their bodies lul each other.

Since they are both hockey players, that means they're always hungry. Neither of them are exactly chefs, but they manage to get by.

Even as Sidney makes them a grilled cheese sandwhich that would bring his mother to his knees from joy and Alex makes a pathetic salad, they always end up touching. Whether it's a simple brush or a lingering hold, the heat from Sid's touch soothes him and the cold flesh underneath Alex's fingers as he brushed along the Canadian's arm sends a thrill of pure exuberance through him. And it's the best thing he could've asked for.

He'll be damned if anyone would try and take away this moment.  
.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The point of this chapter was to lengthen this out because I feel like I'm moving to quickly and I want to at least get close a hundred thousand words (which is unlikely). Also I felt really lovey dovey today and I had to write this. I felt like I wasn't giving my extra pairings enough spotlight to focus on their relationship. So there. Hope you like it and I didn't scare you to much


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next month is mpreg month! You know what that means? ... I get to make an overly detailed, excrutiatingly long work that is like double the size of this (probably an exageration) that all fits into one chapter while trying to have it all make sense. Woosh! (It's actually really fun, you should try it. well not that long or overly detailed) So I already have the plan worked out and everything. And I'm going to begin writing it today, that way I'll for sure have it done before the end of the month. That is going to be a real bitch. Especially working out all the details and making sure it's good. I'll also need someone to beta it. So if you're up to the challenge, please comment on here or email me (my email is on my profile if you decide to go that route).  
> I will be working on chapter thirteen of this though. Might even be posting it soon, just not surehhow far I should take it and when to cut it off. I'm also going to be focusing a little more on the other couples. I feel that Sid and Alex need a little alone time.  
> So sorry for this being so long. You have to understand that back in my fanfiction dot net glory days, everything I wrote was mpreg. And I written any more since 2011. This month will be exciting for me because I love babies and being able to have a family and relish in those beginning moments of parenthood where your baby is pure innocence and will never do any wrong. The feeling of your life coming together and that nothing will break you new family.  
> I am done, promise. Thank you for reading and now you can read the stuff you actually care about. Thanks!

Chapter 12:

They spend a few days lounging around Alex's house. Trading sloppy kisses while talking about basically nothing.

It's around two when Alex gets a phone call that makes his face go fall and go outside in such a hurry that Sister doesn't have any time to ask who it is.

He comes back in half an hour later, mouth in a thin line and his brows knitted together.

"Who was that?" Sid asks.

Alex takes his spot on the couch as close to Sid as possible, "Mother."

Sidney perks up, "Great, what did she want?"

"Wanted to know when I come home." Alex replies.

Sidney licks his lips. He knew they were eventually going to have this talk, he just never wanted it to actually happen. "And what did you tell her?"

Alex's eyes follow the movement as he frowns, "That I not."

Sid's mouth drops open in surprise, "What? Why wouldn't you go?"

The look Ovie gives him is a clear indication that he has to be an idiot not to know why. "I never tell her about us. Also could never bring you over there. To risky."

"Then go without me." Sidney forces himself to say.

Alex grabs his hands, "Can't just leave you here by self!"

Sid rolls his eyes, "Alex, I'm not going to stay here. I'll fly back to Nova Scotia and .. check up on things."

Ovie opens his mouth to protest, but Sid puts his it to keep it close.

"Go spend time with your family. We'll call each other every day just to check up," Sid assures him, "We probably need a little time apart."

Alex nods, "Distance make heart .. grow fonder?"

Sidney just nods, curling up against the Russian to press their lips together. Alex hums into it, wrapping his arms around the smaller man's back to pull him into his lap.

Sid straddles him, fingers roaming through his already messy brown hair. Alex rubs large circles on his back, kissing him lazily until they need air.

They spend the next hour sitting like that, discussing their plans and how Alex needs to do this. And no Alex, you can't stuff Sid into your suitcase and pretend he's a blow up doll to sneak him past airport security and into your bedroom at home. Alex, you can absolutely not try and kidnap Sidney and force him to drive all the way to Canada while you sing ridiculous songs that will probably be in Russian.

"There is no way we're going to spend the whole summer in your house not doing anything." Sidney objects.

Alex mumbles something that sounds like the beginning of an arguement. Instead of trying to make out anything he says, he climbs off the Russian's lap. Finding his laptop on the table and starts making flight arrangements.

Ovie makes quiet, whimpering noises of protests, but other wise stays silent. Sid knows that he misses his family, whether or he not he admits it. Hell, he misses his own (former) family. At least Alex's wants to see him.

He really tries not to think about them. But there are those nights when Alex wanders off into another room to have a private conversation with his folks, that makes him want to call up his own. Sidney will never forget the way his mother would kiss his cheek to welcome him home after being gone even for just a minute. They way his dad would squeeze his shoulder approvingly after a good game, or the smile after a loss that spoke so many words of encouragment that Troy would never say out loud. Or the multiple times Taylor was an infant and would run up to Sidney as he came home from school to great him, or how even though she grew up she never stopped doing it.

Sidney really missses his family. It's evident how he would let his finger linger over the call button beside his mother's name. Even if it went to voicemail, it would be worth it just to hear her warm, loving voice. Or hear his sister's bitching about how she needs new goalie pads when she just got some last year. Or watch his father's eyes shine with approval at his children.

He'll never be able to experience that feeling again. And he'll be damned if he brings that pain and agony upon Alex as well.

"What you thinking?" Alex asks.

Sidney's head snaps up from the black computer screen to look up at Alex. "Hm?"

"You stare at screen for long time after buy ticket. Wonder what is on mind." Alex replies.

"Oh uh it's um," Sid studders, "nothing. It's nothing."

Alex rolls his eyes, kissing Sid's shoulder and letting his hand rest on the Canadian's inner thigh, pinkie rubbing against the clothed cock.

"You're a teenager." Sid rolls his eyes.

Alex gives him a shit eating amirk that he would normally hate, "You love me."

"If we go upstairs will you shut up?" Sid asks playfully.

"Only if I carry you." Alex says.

Sidney caves. Letting himself be carried like he weighs nothing, staring into those bright blue eyes like their isn't anything else in the world worth looking at (and he'd be perfectly content if there wasn't).

Alex lays him down gently. Sid's head resting on the extra cushiony pillows that he's forced to use (and totally loves).

The Russian takes off both their shirts, eyes gazing hungrily over Sid's pale chest as he slowly slips off the white sweatpants that he acquired for Alex's closet, tossing it onto the pile of clothes that already lay on the ground.

Ovie frenches Sidney, hands cupping the perfect curve of his ass. The Canadian arches his back, holding their bodies together. Alex pulls away, easing his back onto the bed.

"Relax." Alex whispers.

And Sidney does that (or at least tries to).

It gets really hard when Ovie starts mouthing his hard cock through his boxers. The mixture of saliva and precome causing a wet spot to form that makes him feel more than uncormfortable.

"Alex ... Alex, please." He pants.

Alex looks up at him with a proud smirk, slowly easing himself out of his own jeans and briefs, before taking off Sid's.

The Canadian concentrates on the look of Alex's hard dick, pleading with his eyes to hurry it up. Probably looking vulnerable and really stupid.

Him and Alex have traded blow jobs before. Amazing ones at that. Yet this time, and every time, Alex pins his hips down to the bed and takes the head in his mouth, it feels so different than all the other times that he's done it.

It makes him wonder if Alex feels the same. Sometimes, it really sucks to not know what's going on in the Russian's head. He really wants to be able to do some. crazy mind reading shit and just know what he's thinking when it's not evident on his face.

He might be scared to know what his boyfriend thinks at times. (Though it would really help the next time they play against each other.)

Alex always has a way of .. making Sid lose track of time. Especially in these moments. Where his fingers brush against the smaller man's balls, engulfing his dick fully, and just stare up at him with seemingly unblinking eyes. Usually these moments fly by, but today it goes by slow. Exhaling and inhaling becomes something he can't do as he receives air through short, rapid pants.

He's gripping the sheets so hard that his knuckles turn white and they're going to end up with a hole, that or stretched beyond belief.

The Russian slips a finger into his ass and Sid yelps out his name, his body shuddering through his orgasm.

With a pleased smirk, Alex jacks himself off over Sid's chest. The Canadian strokes his balls, causing his hips to jerk as he comes, the come totally missing his body and spreading it self on the bedsheet next to him.

Alex chuckles at himself as he plops down next to his lover, pulling the smaller man into a comfortable and tight cuddling position.

"You know we can't just leave that there." Sidney points out, looking up at Alex through his eyelashes.

Something inside Alex must've melted, because his shoulders relax even more and now -he- looks vulnerable, "I know. Stay here for bit."

That's probably the best idea Sidney has ever heard because he -really- doesn't want to move, "Yeah, then we can start packing."

Alex presses a soft kiss to the scar on Sid's head, "Sleep."

Ovie reaches out, turning off the bedside lamp, rubbing large circles on Sid's back again.

Sidney breathes in time to the rise and fall of his boyfriend's chest. Allowing the gentle pace to sooth him.

For the first time in what feels like an eternity, he doesn't have a nightmare.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm super upset about all the trades. Nevertheless, I'm glad Brooksie and Matt went to the Caps.  
> But oh my god ... JAMES!!!!! NO!!!!!! Why?!?! *cries self to death*  
> And Jussi. Why Jussi why did you leave us? *cries in grave*
> 
> Anyways, while writing this chapter, I realized I was using the 2012/2013 Penguins roster *face palm*. So I'll go back and tweak some names. This will be taking place in 2013. I deeply apologize for not realizing this sooner.

Chapter 13:

Jonny doesn't like to sleep alone. But he knows Kaner likes to wake up ridiculously early. Half way their summer vacation, he still gets out of bed at seven in the morning.

Its like the Vancouver Olympics all over again and he's sharing a bed with Sidney (they were letting Army room with them and they only had two beds. what else were they supposed to do?) rather than his lover.

Instead of waking up to the other side of his bed being empty and cold, he handcuffs Patrick to the metal loops of the headboard and cuddles next to him.

~

Kaner wakes up a little later than normal, eight forty-two. He let's himself stare at Jonny's gorgeous sleep face. 

This is why he likes to get up earlier than his boyfriend. Allowing himself a few minutes to take in this sight, drilling it into his brain, before making coffee and catching up on the news.

Mentally sighing, Pat tries to use his right hand to rub his face, but he can't move it from underneath his pillow. So he lifts it and ...

Why is a blue, furry handcuff wrapped around his wrist?

"Jonny, what the -fuck-?" Kaner asks, gently shaking his lover awake.

One of Jonny's eyes open, he mumbles "sleep" before snuggling against the American, his side of the bed totally forgotten.

Patrick sighs, wrapping his arms around his captain's shoulders, "Could've just said something."

Toews makes an inaudible noise that was probably some form of protest.

Letting his eyes slip close, he kisses the top of his lover's head and tries to get in at least another hour of sleep.

...

James left to go home a week after they were kicked from the playoffs. Paulie was sad to see him go, but he knew the man needed his family.

So Paul went home and visited his folks. Catching up on everything he's missed while staying far away from sports as he can.

Unlike most people, Martin doesn't like to surround himself around sports twenty-four seven. Once his season is done, he's done with sports (except soccer, because who doesn't like soccer?).

Nealsy doesn't call him at all. Paulie considers whether or not he should text the Canadian, just to make sure if he's okay. But then he wonders if he's being ignored, or if James needs some space.

Whatever the reason, Paul doesn't want to ruin their relationship by pushing to hard.

...

Evgeni loved being in Russia. Pittsburgh is great and all, and his teammates are like family. But nothing can compare to being surrounded by true flesh and blood.

Of course, a trip back home means a trip filled with those annoying Russians that he sees all the time (they're not actually annoying, but they act as if they haven't seen Evgeni in years and won't leave him the fuck alone).

Aside from his family, spending time with Pavel Datsyuk and Sergei Gonchar is his favorite part of his vacation.

Then there's Alex he has to deal with.

He still loves Sanja in the same way he does Sergei. And he -wants- to go back to the way things were. But everytime Ovechkin checks his phone, a pleased smirk in his face, the way he walks with a pep in his step, makes his jealous side come out.

Whenever Sasha pulled him and Sanja into a strip club, the Cap didn't pay any attention to the gorgeous, naked girls dancing right in front of him. Last year, Ovie would take as many women as he could home with them. Fucking them so hard its a surprise they didn't break (Evgeni knows this because he's heard and partaken when it happened),

Alex just buried himself in his phone, staring blankly at the wall or the ground as he sipped his vodka and joined in on random conversations.

It makes Malkin start to wonder if his friend and Sidney have had sex yet. Surely they've exchanged hand jobs, maybe even blow jobs. But Sid doesn't seem like the kind of person who'd go all the way in such a sort amount of time (though it seems longer, they've only been together about three months, maybe a little more).

Then again, Alex does have a way of .. persuading people to do things they may or may not want to.

The thought of Ovechkin pressuring his captain into sex. Making him so whatever the Russian wants to keep his boyfriend there. It pisses Evgeni off. His blood boils when his mind floats to the idea, the image of Alex touching Sidney like that, probably leaving scratches and bruises on the Canadian's perfect body.

Malkin hadn't realized he had his fist clenched and glaring at Sanja until Pavel grabs his wrist.

"You okay Zhenya?" Datsyuk asks.

The Penguin relaxes slightly, "Yeah, I'm fine."

For the first time all night, Alex locks the screen of his phone and slips into his pocket, "You shouldn't lie to the man Zhenya."

Malkin snarls, "No one fucking asked you."

Ovechkin gives him a hurt look, he opens his mouth to speak, but Pavel puts up a hand.

"I don't know what the issue is between you two, nor do i want to. As you know, I don't get out much. So, I want the both of you to put your problems aside, act like best friends, pick one of these pretty girls and get laid. Okay?" Datsyuk orders.

Pavel doesn't usually come when they gather together. Hell, he doesn't even go out with Malkin that much. Datsyuk isn't that crazy, energetic hockey player that he once was. The only thing he really does, outside his profession, is try and make another baby (which isn't actually a bad thing).

"Yeah Sanja. I'm sure any of these girls would -love- to go home with you." Evgeni sneers.

Alex's eyes show his pity, "Zhenya, we have been friends for years. Now stop acting like a child and move on with your life."

Malkin stands up, wobbling slightly from the amount of alcohol he's consumed, "Fuck you. You have no idea what friendship is."

The Capital rolls his eyes, "Coming from the person who's always trying to steal what is mine."

Evgeni starts toward his (ex?)friend, but Sergei grabs his wrist and forces him back down.

"I am taking the both of you home. Once there, I want you to work out your problems and fix your shit." Gonchar orders.

Pavel and Nabokov stay with the other Russian NHLers who had politely minded their own business while Sergei drives with Malkin (becomes he's way to intoxicated to do it himself).

"I thought you and Nicky were together?" Gonchar asks as he drives.

Evgeni sighs, "I .. I don't know. I thought the same, but he hasn't tried to contact me and we never .. really classified what we are, or were."

Sergei gives him a look, "Okay, then why are you trying to ruin the one good thing Sanja has going for him?"

The Penguin doesn't respond.

"You two .. really need to stop acting like horny children with only one pretty girl on the playground." Sergei shakes his head as he pulls into Alex's driveway.

Evgeni gets out of the car before its stopped, zooming into the house.

Ovechkin stands in the middle of the living room, his eyes jerk to Evgeni as the door is slammed behind him.

"You seriously need to stop trying to get between us." Alex blurts out.

"Then you need to stop trying to get between his legs." Malkin growls.

Alex smirks, "Its not considered trying when I already have."

Evgeni takes a shot at his face, but his drunken state causes him to miss wildly and stumble.

"Zhenya, that's what happens when people date and fall in love. Its not a new concept."

"It is when you -force- him to have sex with you."

Ovechkin rolls his eyes, "If you must know, Sidney was the one who set it up."

Evgeni is shocked, "Bullshit."

Alex sighs, "I have no reason to lie to you."

The room starts to spin, so Malkin gently sits down on the couch, holding his head in his hands. Several moments later, the cushion sinks down next to him.

"Zhenya, I'm sorry. I know that you think you love Sidney, the same way you thought you loved Oksana," Alex says, "Even if you did end up together, it never would've worked out."

"H-How can you say that when you don't know?" Evgeni asks.

Ovechkin stays silent for a minute before replying, "I can't answer that. But you know deep down inside, you're feelings come from a sexual desire," he pauses, "Maybe .. Maybe you should try and work things out with Nicky. I know he cares about you .. and I'm sure you'd feel the same if you gave him a chance."

The Penguin doesn't respond, trying to slow his breathing, "Why did it have to be you? I mean ... I can't even look at you without .. thinking of you two being together. Of you .. hurting .. him."

"I don't know why he chose me, but I'm damn grateful for it. And I'd never ruin this chance to be with someone like him. Most importantly, I'd never hurt him in any way." Alex says, his voice soft.

"Its just ... its not fair." Evgeni chokes out.

Alex rubs large circles on his back, "You just ... have to let yourself find the right person."

Evgeni hasn't cried because of non hockey related reasons since before Juniors. He especially hasn't shed tears over a person.

He doesn't know what's wrong with him. Maybe he does have some feelings toward Nicky. He honestly thought they were legitimately together. Then the Swede just falls off the face of the Earth.

Evgeni had kept his emotions in order when he and Nicklas had been .. fooling around. Even when he saw Sidney and Alex together, he wasn't really even jealous.

"Can ... could you ever forgive me?" Malkin asks, his voice barely comprehend able through his sobs and slurred speech.

"I was never mad at you Zhenya." Ovechkin whispers, "If there was something I could do, trust me, I would in heart beat."

Evgeni leans against the Capital, silently letting out all his pent up frustrations. Alex murmurs kind, soothing words to him.

He doesn't remember falling asleep, but he wakes up in his own bed with large Russian nearly laying on top of him.

...

Sidney had flown to Canada. But he was only hiding inside his home. He's considering selling it because he has no use for it anymore.

He'd been waiting months to read Taylor's text, procrastinating until he knew he was totally alone.

Sitting cross legged on his bed in is house there's no one to interrupt him.

'Sid, I know this'll probably be the last time I'll talk to you for a while, so wanted to get some things off my chest,' the text reads, 'I've always suspected you were gay. And it doesn't make me think any different of you. You'll always be my awkward and dorky bro and I'll always love you. I am curious about who the guy was and if you have a boyfriend. He has to be super funny and awesome and hockey obsessed and completely gorgeous. Basically just a manlier version of you,' Sidney smiles to himself, 'I'm trying to say that you deserve the best and ONLY the best. I don't care how happy he makes you, I will never allow my big bro to be with some dickhead okay? And if anyone, and I mean ANYONE, gives you a hard time, I will beat his ass.' He chews his bottom lip, 'I know you're going through a hard time right now, and I know you miss me because I miss you too. Remember that I'll always be watching you on TV. I swear to never miss a game if you never miss one of mine.' He closes his blurry eyes for a second before continuing, 'i know you can't respond to this, my numbers going to be changed soon anyways. But I know I'll see you again, hopefully sooner rather than later. Just don't forget about your little sis, okay? -Love Taylor'

Sidney sets the phone down on the bed next to him. Pulling his knees up to his chest, his shoulders shake and his stomach clenches as he sobs uncontrollably. He's never felt so lonely, so abandoned, before. Its not Taylor's fault. He's grateful she even risked contacting him.

He cries for another ten minutes, staying curled up for over an hour. When his muscles start to ache, he unfolds himself.

Sid goes down stairs and numbly chews on apple slices. He isn't particularly hungry, but it's nearing ten p.m. and he will regret not eating later if he doesn't now.

He spends two hours blankly watching some horror movie (which was more disgusting and creepy than scary). Around midnight, there's a knock on his door.

Sidney doesn't move. No one he knows is going to bother him at this hour.

The knock happens again.

And again.

And again.

Then the person is spamming his doorbell.

Groaning loudly to himself, Sid forces himself off the coach and trudges over to the door.

He swings it open, his throat swells and it feels like he can't breath, let alone form words.

"Hi Sidney."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hahahaha I just left you with a cliffhanger!)))))))
> 
> I have an idea of who the mystery person should be, but I want to know who YOU think it should be!  
> Leave your vote in the comments and majority always rules. (But it can't be any Russians!!)


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14:

"Dad?" Sidney chokes out, then clears his throat, "Sorry, I mean _Troy_."

He shakes his head, "I need my son."

Sid's heart stops, "Last time I checked you didn't have one."

"Can I come in so we can .. talk?" Troy asks.

Against his better judgement, the Penguin moves out the way and let's the older man in, "This better be good."

"I'm sorry." Troy says quietly, "I never should've .. treated you like that. You're ... Taylor was right. You're family. And we never turn our back on family."

"Maybe you should've thought of that before disowning me on national television." Sidney snaps.

The older man nods, "I know .. Your mother and I have been so worried since you got hurt-"

"What about Taylor?"

"She's wrecked." He sighs, "She cries all night and she refuses to talk to us until she sees you."

"I'd do the same. Where is she ri-"

"Sidney!"

He barely has time to process the high pitched shriek before a small body is colliding with his.

"Taylor." Sid breaths her sweet name, wrapping his arm around his sister's shoulders.

"I've .. I haven't stopped thinking about you. W-when you got hit, I got so scared. I-I-" Taylor babbles on.

"Shh. You're here now, and I'm fine. It'll be okay." Sidney whispers, kissing the top of her head with a huge grin on his face.

Troy puts an arm around his shoulders, rubbing small circles on his daughter's back.

Sid's heart swells up as well as the tears in his eyes. But something feels off, like somethings missing.

"Wait ... where's Trina?"

Troy sighs, "That's what I wanted to talk about."

Taylor's cry morphs into a sob and she clutches the back of her brother's shirt.

" _Troy?_ "

"Trina she's .. She's in the hospital."

~

They rush down to the hospital Trina's at. She had a heart attack and was diagnosed with Atherosclerosis.

Sidney probably should be listening to what the doctors are saying, but everything is moving in a blur. 

How can his mother be sick? She's always been healthy! How .. how could this have happened?

"Sidney." Trina's voice is so weak, barely above a whisper.

Sid uses his hand to cover one of her's, "I'm right here."

She smiles weakly, "You're so pretty."

The Penguin let's a tear escape the corner of his eye before quickly wiping it away, "Not nearly as much as you are."

"I love my baby so much. You know that right?"

Sidney nods, his throat growing tight.

"I love the both of you." Trina whispers, running her hand through Taylor's hair.

"I .. I-I love you too mama." Stay chokes out through her tears.

"I never want us to break up again," she pauses to cough, "Sidney, we're so sorry about how we treated you. Its not your choice who you like, you can't choose your sexuality. So we came to a conclusion that we can accept a gay son, right dear?"

"Right." Troy replies, his voice cold.

Sid looks over at him. Troy stands uncomfortably, his arms crossed over his chest and face a complete stone. He looks unhappy, if not a little angered.

It occurs to him that the only reason he's here is to please Trina. Its hurts like a punch to the gut to think that Troy doesn't want him here.

 _Fuck him_ , Sidney thinks, _I'm here for mom, not him._

The hockey player plants a soft kiss onto his mother's knuckles as she falls into a medication induced sleep.

~

When James finally calls Paulie, its at two in the damn morning, and the ginger isn't having it.

"James," he groans, "What do you want?"

"I love you."

Martin drops the phone.

He scrambles to pick it up, his eyes still a little blurry and the room spinning.

"Oh my god. I'm so, so sorry Paul. _Fuck_. I .. I'm so fucking sorry .. Fuck me man." Nealsy sighs, "I'm so fucking sorry. I-I-"

"James."

"Paul?"

"I love you too."

A pause, "Oh."

"Oh?"

"I .. I wasn't expecting that."

Paulie chuckles softly, "What did you expect?"

"Not to just blurt it out like that for starters." James says, letting out a sigh.

"I miss you."

"I miss you too," Nealer returns, "Do you .. uh .. want to meet my .. parents?"

"I don't know," Martin smirks, "Are they as hair obsessed as you? If so, then I'll need to go to a professional stylist, or something."

James laughs. A throaty and happy laugh that sounds so beautiful and perfect, "Okay .. Okay."

"Are we .. being for real right now?" Paulie asks, "This isn't a weird joke or prank?"

"I am being very for real right now."

Paulie let's out a shaky breath, "So .. when do you want me to come up there?"

"How about .. a week before our first practice? You can stay here a week before coming down to Pittsburgh together." Nealsy suggests.

"Its a date."

"Paulie."

"James?"

"I love you."

"I love you too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been feeling kind of sad lately and in afraid its shown in my work here .. So I tried to end this chapter off on a sort of happy note.
> 
> I'm sorry if this was weird .. or whatever.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter fifteen?? Really? Wow. I hadn't expected it to come so soon ...
> 
> I started this on March 21st, 2024. So its over five months old. Wow. I never thought it'd ever be this big.
> 
> I want to thank everyone who has read this and continues to do so. I kind of steered off track with writing about their summers and everything. If you still love this as much as you did when you first read this, it means the world to me.
> 
> Thank you all for everything. I love you all, honestly. 
> 
> All feedback is greatly appreciated. It makes my day that anyone would take the time to write a comment or something :)

Chapter Fifteen:

Sidney didn't leave his mother's side until he had to go back to Pittsburgh. He hadn't realized it was August or that his birthday had passed.

He and Alex talked at least once a day. If they couldn't Skype, they talked on the phone for hours. Alex would send him silly pictures of him, his friends, and family (the ones with Geno made him smile because he knew they were friends again) and cute texts about how he cant wait to see him again, to kiss him, to hold him. They wouldn't be able to see each other until the Capitals came to Pittsburgh two days after the Pens played Philadelphia. It isn't until the beginning of November, but at least they'll see each other.

Despite everything that's been going on, life isn't to horrible. Trina is slowly getting better. Taylor got accepted into Shattuck's. Their family is sort of back together. He and his father are somewhat on good terms, at least for Trina. Not to mention, hockey's starting soon and he's been cleared to play.

Sidney arrives in Pittsburgh an hour before their first practice starts. So he takes a cab from the airport straight to the Consol.

Of course, the press is swarmed around the front door. He tries to go through them, he just wants to get inside. But they all are just so interested in what their first gay athlete thinks about the second one to come out.

"How is your relationship with Jonathan Toews?"

"Tazer is one of my best and closest friends." Sid says for what feels like the hundredth time.

"Do you think he came out to draw attention to himself? Or to take the pressure off of you?"

"Neither. He was obviously frustrated to be constantly asked about the same thing over and over, especially after a tough loss."

"How do you feel about Toews and his lover, Patrick Kane, being on the same team?"

Sidney smiles, watching Kaner gush about his relationship with Jonny on ESPN had been adorable, "They've liked each other for a very long time. I'm very happy they found each other. But to answer your question, I don't care if they're on the same team or not. Does them both playing in Chicago bother me? Absolutely not. In fact, more power to them."

"Would you ever consider being with one of your teammates?"

"Well, all of my teammates are straight and most of them are either in a relationship or married. But if the right person came along, you never know."

Sidney manages to squeeze into the doors and away from the cameras. The cold air hits him. The smell the rink is strong. The sound of greetings after a long summer of not seeing each other, people yelling long missed chirps, and the shuffle of equipment echo through the halls.

It feels like home.

In a way, it is. He spent most of his childhood inside a rink. His team is the only real family he's ever had.

The yells of his team members grow louder and louder, nearly killing his eardrums as he stands in the locker room threshold.

"Sid!" Geno calls, engulfing him in a hug.

Sidney grins, "Hey, Geno, you're kind of suffocating me."

"Sorry," Malkin says, letting him go, "Miss Sid all summer. Then Mario tell us about mother. Feel bad I no call or text you."

"G, its fine-"

"No it not," Geno interrupts, "I take you out tonight. You get drunk, I drive you home."

Sid smirks, "No, no, no. No drinking until after we beat the Flyers."

Malkin frowns, "We don't play Flyers 'til November."

"Exactly."

"But I want to make captain happy!"

"Then you can take me to dinner." Sidney suggests.

Geno's eyes bright up, "We go dinner once a week. Become new routine!"

Sidney blinks, "uh .. uh. Yeah, sure. Okay."

"Great!" Geno says, grabbing his captain's wrist, "Come in, we get ready. No want Dan mad at us on first day."

"Uh .. yeah."

~

Practice goes decent. He's placed on first line with Duper and Kuni. Geno has second with Nealer and Jussi. Sidney's not used to having Kuni on his left yet, but Chris has is a really amazing player and will be even better once they get into the groove of things.

Mario forces Sidney back to his place (not that he was putting up much of a fight). The kids are happy to see him, and he's happy to see them.

They end up playing NHL '05. The kids argue about who gets to be Mario and who gets to be Sidney.

Why don't I get to be myself?" Sd asks

He's banished to the kitchen.

Mario smirks, "They banish you too?"

"I suggest that I play myself in a video game and now I'm not allowed into the living room."

Nathalie hugs him, "Its okay. Mario isn't allowed in there either."

"That's because you banned me from the TV."

"I wouldn't have to ban you if you stopped watching your shows when the kids are around."

"I wouldn't have to watch my shows if you gave me a little more love."

Sidney stands there with his hands shoved deep into his pockets, eyes on the ground. Them arguing- lover's spat? - doesn't necessarily bother him. Its that he may never get to have a big home, a large family or a spouse to do that with. He and Alex will, hopefully remain together a long time. But they could never get married or anything ..

"Cookies are done!" Nathalie says, pulling on an oven mit.

Mario frowns, "Sugar free?"

Nathalie rolls her eyes, "No. I knew that our health nut of a son was coming over and decided to make cookies he wouldn't eat. Of course they're sugar free!"

Sid smirks, "You guys argue to much. No wonder your kids are so mean."

"I knew it was all your fault!" Nathalie says, tossing off the mit.

"It takes two people to argue dear." Mario points out.

She gives her husband a look, "Are you trying to sleep on the couch?"

Mario hangs his head, "Maybe."

"Well, you are now banned from the kitchen. Shoo, shoo."

Sidney giggles as Mario pretends to storm out of the kitchen and attacks his children on the couch.

"You two are so cute together." Sid gushes.

Nathalie blushes, "I'm sure you and Alex are no different. You should invite him over for dinner when they come to tow next."

Sidney snorts "I'd love to hear that conversation."

"We're technically your family now, and you have to bring your boyfriend over here sometime."

"You've met him before."

"Yes dear. But that was when he was a rival player. Now he's your man, potentially part of the family you plan to build. Just invite him over when they come to town."

Sid smiles fondly, "I will, Nat. You're the best."

"I know. I'm awesome."

Yes, yes she is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you managed to make it to the end, i hope it was alright. I think this came out as a little forced. I know what I'm shooting for, but getting there is a path of its own (if that makes sense).


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter _Sixteen_? We're here already?
> 
> Things are starting to get real intense here .. Well, not exactly in this chapter .. or maybe it will be. Who knows?
> 
> This season is going to zoom by rather quickly, so be prepared for that.
> 
> I cut the ending off of this chapter and decided to use it to start the next chapter. I hope this can hold you off until its done.
> 
> This story has had its ups and downs, and its about to hit rock bottom as everything we know comes toppling down.
> 
> I want to thank everyone who has read this and continues to do so. Remember, all feedback is greatly appreciated :)

Chapter 16:

The season starts out on a high note. They win their first five games before falling short against the Rangers. Sidney is on track for another one hundred point season, and Geno isn't that far behind him. They stay mostly healthy, Duper and Beau fall to slight wrist injuries, but they don't stay don't for long.

To the surprise of most, including himself, Sidney becomes closer to his teammates than normal. He's playing great, his concussion symptoms have yet to return, and he's making friends with his team. Not to mention they're all having great seasons, and the Pens are projected to go far in the playoffs.

Sidney keeps to his word and goes out to dinner with Geno. A friendly diner on the far edge of Pittsburgh where nobody recognizes them and there's no media scum lurking outside, hoping to make a story out of two teammates having dinner.

Geno is great company. He doesn't talk much, unlike most of their team members. He listens to everything Sid says and responds openly. Whenever silence falls between them, its not awkward or forced. In fact, its quite peaceful.

Because Geno is a giant sweetheart and a true gentleman, he walks his captain to his door. They hug, bid each other a goodnight, and he kisses the top of Sidney's head before slowly walking backwards to his car.

That night, he dreams about himself, Alex, Geno, and their future families. How, in a perfect world, they could all live peacefully and play hockey.

"You look happy." Flower says the following morning practice.

Sid smirks and glances at Geno, "Well, I had a great night."

Marc looks between the two of them, eyebrows raised, "Does, uh ... Ovie know about .. this?"

"I haven't had the chance to call him yet, but I'm going to after practice."

"You're going to do it over the phone?" Marc asks.

"Its not like it matters." Sid replies.

Flower puts a hand on his shoulder, "Sid, I know you're not accustom to the rules of dating yet, but that's something you need to do face to face."

That's how Sidney ends up Skyping Alex the second he gets home.

"Hi Sid." Alex greets, a slight smile on his lips.

Sidney sighs, "I was told this is something you're supposed to do in person, but you don't come to town until November, and this can't wait until then."

"Sidney-"

"I had dinner with Geno."

Alex stares at the screen, an unreadable expression on his face, "Like .. big dinner?"

"Not really. We just went to that dinner on the edge of Pittsburgh." Sid bites the inside of his cheek.

"Was .. serious? Like date?"

"What? Why would I go on a date with him when I'm with you?" Sid asks.

Ovie visibly relaxes, "If not date, and not serious, then why did you no just call?"

"Because Flower said this was something we had to talk about, face to face, and this is the closest I could get."

Alex thinks it over, "Did you tell him what happen or he just speak?"

"He said I looked happy, I told him I had a great night. Then he said that I should talk to you about it." Sid explains.

"Great night?"

Sidney blushes and ducks his head, "I had a dream about you and me living together, with our own family. And Geno and Mario were our neighbors."

Ovie laughs lightly, "You so cute when blush."

"I'm not blushing." Sid objects, trying to look stern.

Apparently he fails, because Alex's face breaks into a huge grin, "Serious face no work on me Sid. You no my captain."

Sidney rolls his eyes, "That wasn't my serious face. You don't know what that looks like."

"I ask Zhenya. He mimicks it all time."

"You guys talk about me?"

"Of course, you only care about we talking 'bout you. No matter that Zhenya make silly face trying to look like Sid." Alex teases.

"Why are you such an ass?"

"Why do you have such big ass?"

Sidney groans, "I walked into that one, huh?"

"Always do."

"So .. you don't have a problem with Geno and I going out to dinner or anything, right?" Sid asks.

"If it only stay friendly then I no care," Alex replies, "But if he ever try anything and you say no, but he no stop, call me and I kick his ass."

"Geno wouldn't do that. He isn't that kind of person."

"You no know Zhenya like I do" Ovie points out, "Be careful with him, okay?"

"Alright," Sid agrees, "I love you and goodnight."

"Love you too. 'Night."

~

Sid and Geno going out isn't a problem. Geno never makes a move, despite everyone thinking he will. Their situation is perfect. Sidney has a friend he can confide in, and Geno gets to repair things after his and Alex's little blow up.

Its so perfect in fact, that it becomes part of his routine. They start going out once a week, then after everyone win, then every other day. Sometimes they'd spend the night at Geno's place and order take out, or they'll go to Sidney's and he'll cook for his guest.

The more time they spend together, the more he gets to know the Russian, and it goes both ways. Its incredibly amazing.

Alex finds it hysterical. He laughs whenever Sid brings it up, and he teases the Canadian over silly texts, asking if he had a fun night followed by several winky faces.

Flower is skeptical. He constantly sends his captain disapproving looks during practice whenever he gets close to Geno. Normally, Sidney would find it irritating. But he knows Marc is just looking out for him.

~

The guys, because they're asses, constantly make jokes about Sid cheating on Alex with Geno, and about how the "Russian mob is going to kick his ass". Especially Kuni and Tanger, who find it so funny they bring Colby into the picture.

"I never expected you to be the whoring around type, Squid." Colby says after the Pens and Leafs play each other in Toronto.

"I'm not." Sid protests, "They're just being dicks."

Army shakes his head and stares at him for several long minutes with cold, judgemental eyes, "I'm sure they'd never say anything if they weren't concerned."

Sidney sighs, "I love Geno, as a friend, and I know how he feels about me. But I love Alex more. I'd never do anything to mess up what I have with him."

"Just be careful alright?"

"I'm always careful."

"I know Sidney," Colby says, "But most people will do whatever it takes to get what they want."

"Geno would never take advantage of me."

"Sometimes-"

"No," Sidney interrupts, "I know Geno. He's not like that."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not everyone can be trusted ...


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What you want will probably ruin everything, but you take that risk for someone you think you love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter should be entirely in Geno's POV and we'll get to see what has been going on with him and Nicky (his estranged boyfriend-fuckbuddy-thing) and what's been stirring in his head.
> 
> Due to my inability to speak and type in the English language right now, please forgive me for all spelling/grammar errors. This week is just not my week I guess ..
> 
> Things are (hopefully) getting intense here .. I hope this has been a good read and continues to be. I'm trying to stretch this out as long as possible, because I feel the end is nearing .. or maybe not. We'll just have to wait and see.
> 
> I want to thank everyone who's read this and continues to do so, it means so much to me. This has been my favorite fic to write and i hope its your favorite to read (or at least one of them). I think this fic is coming to a close soon (it should be .. maybe) so that's making me really sad because I love this work and I never want it to end ... but I guess it has to sometime ...
> 
> Thank you for all your continued support throughout this long, long journey! You've read about the highs, and the lows, but are you prepared to hit rock bottom?

Chapter 17:

-November-

Nicklas hasn't called him. Then again, Evgeni hasn't made the effort to pick up the phone either. They were never actually dating. So its not like it was an obligation they _had_ to speak to each other ..

But when Henrik Lundqvist shows up on his doorstep at four in the morning months before they're scheduled for a game, he knows he's in deep shit.

Henrik doesn't say anything as he barges into Evgeni's house, pushing the tired Russian out of his way and staring at him with intimidating, threatening eyes.

"Reason you here?" Geno asks, scratching the top of his head in pretend confusion.

Lundqvist snorts with disgust, "I have no idea what he sees in you."

"What?"

"Nicklas," Lundqvist shakes his head, "talks about you as if you were some precious jewel."

"Okay?"

"Yet here you are, looking exactly like the ass you are." The Swede makes a clucking sound with his tongue, "You are pathetic."

"What make you think you come here, insult me?" Evgeni cringes at how poor his choice of words are.

Henrik's expression turns hard, "You cheating on him?"

"What?"

"Are. You. Cheating. On. Him." Lundqvist repeats.

"We not even together."

The goalie cocks his head to the side, "That's not what Nicky thinks."

"He has funny way of showing it." Geno grumbles.

"You're a real piece of shit."

Evgeni rolls his eyes, "You leave now, yes?"

Lundqvist rolls his sleeves up to his elbow, "Someone needs to knock you off your high horse and bring you back to reality. And I'm here to do that."

Geno grunts, "Funny Lundqvist. Now leave before I call cops and tell them crazy Swede goalie try to fight me."

"C'mon bitch, put 'em up." Henrik demands, looking dead serious, "I may not be as big as Ference or Zetterberg, but I'm a better fighter."

"I not fight you."

"Why? You scared bitch?"

"Why you keep calling me bitch? Not very nice."

"You think you're real funny, huh?"

"I not try to be. Just happen."

Lundqvist shoves him, "I wonder what your Russian friends will think when they're told how you were to scared to fight a crazy Swede goalie."

"They think I smart for not fighting goalie," Evgeni turns around to head upstairs, "If you want to talk like men, call me in the morning."

Lundqvist grabs him, spins the Russian on his heels and clocks him in the mouth before Geno can even react. The taste of blood enters his mouth, and he wipes his bottom lip and sees the crimson liquid on his fingertips.

"I not fight you. And tell Nicky if he want talk, use phone."

"Come on and fight me already! Damn!" Henrik whines.

Malkin chuckles, the whining in his voice reminds him of Sidney..

"Do you want me to get Sidney on the phone and -"

"You have Sid number?" Geno interrupts, his voice wavering.

The goalie smirks, "Of course, how else would I get in contact with him for a booty call?" He laughs darkly when Evgeni's hard expression cracks, showing how vulnerable he is.

"He would no do that. He good person. Not like that."

"You really don't know him at all," Lundqvist says, "He's really into the kinky stuff, you know. Like, using the toys .. And he likes it rough-"

"Shut up."

"-Really rough-"

"I say shut up."

"He's a complete slut too. I'm surprised he hasn't fucked anyone on the team-"

Evgeni knows later he'll regret punching Lundqvist in the jaw. He knows he'll never live down doing it again and again until the goalie is on the ground. And he knows kicking the man while he's down isn't his best idea. But right now, he doesn't care.

Protecting Sidney - name, image, and body - comes first.

Sidney always comes first.

Geno leans against the wall, looking down at him, "You done?"

"Fuck .. you." Lundqvist snarls, spitting blood on the carpet.

Malkin doesn't care that he just had this carpet cleaned two days ago, instead he sighs, "Close door on way out."

The goaltender manages to get up by using the wall, and Geno almost laughs at how pathetic the sight is, "Nicky really cares about you. I hope you know that."

"Then maybe he answer call and say to me."

"Why? So you can laugh at him?" Henrik asks, "You're obviously head over heels for Sidney. Nicky knows he doesn't stand a chance."

"He did until he decide never talk to me again.

Lundqvist shakes his head, and kicks Geno between the legs and then hits him twice in the face.

If he ever doubted that goalies were tremendously strong, he was just proven wrong.

"Piece of shit." Henrik mumbles as he leaves.

He hates the Rangers as much as he hates the Flyers.

~

Geno gets to practice a little late the next morning, so the locker room is clear when he gets there. Nobody says anything to him about being late or about his face throughout practice. He starts to forget about it while he's on the ice.

But then he sees Sidney, and it makes him remember.

How much of what Lundqvist had said was true? The idea of Sid and Henrik being together is mind boggling and unrealistic.

Then again the idea of Sidney being interested in Sanja was unbelievable at first, and everyone knows how well that worked out.

But Sidney doesn't look like the kind of person who'd like it rough. And he definitely doesn't seem like a slut.

His mind wanders back to Sanja, and Geno knows how he can be.

And it worries him.

A puck nearly hits him the face.

"Sorry G." Tanger calls, not looking sorry at all.

"Move your feet Malkin!" Bylsma demands.

And Geno does, hoping he wasn't staring at Sidney or something embarrassing like that..

If he was, no one says anything.

No one says anything to him at all actually.

Well, not until he gets out of the shower.

"Whoa, dude. What happened to your face?"

Evgeni raises his eyebrows at Beau, "Hi Bennett. Good see you too."

Beau's brows knit together, "Seriously man. What did you do? Fall down the stairs and hit every step on the way down?"

"You fall out of ugly tree, hit every branch on way down?"

Beau rolls his eyes, "Do you always have to be a smart ass?"

"Do you always have be ugly?"

"Sidney!" Bennett whines loudly, "Geno's being mean to me again!"

Sidney walks over to them, "Geno, what-" his eyes settle on the black eye and busted lip on Malkin's face and he pauses, "Oh my god, what happened?" He squeaks.

The Russian blushes, "Personal thing. Hope talk about with you private."

Sid looks extremely concerned, "Yeah, uh .." he runs a hand through his wet hair, a water droplet drips down his chest (and Geno makes himself not stare at it), "How about I meet you at your house? Or can you not drive?"

"I drove self here." Geno points out.

"Okay. Yeah .. okay." Sid agrees and walks away.

Malkin tries not to watch him walk away - but fails.

"You got it bad, dude." Beau snickers.

"Not as bad as you face." Evgeni teases.

"Why do you always got to go for the face man? Come on."

"Because it easy."

If only everything was that easy.

~

Evgeni manages to get inside and take off his shoes before Sidney is knocking a his door, hands shoved in his pockets and bottom lip between his teeth.

Geno's heart melts a little.

Taking a deep breath - and fixing his hair in the mirror - he opens the door. Sid comes inside without asking for permission and toes his shoes off, eyes focused on the blood splatter across the wall.

"What happened?" Sidney asks, looking at him with wide, concerned eyes.

"Lundqvist come over. Say something I don't like .. We fight a little. Nothing to big." Evgeni replies.

"What did he say?"

Geno sighs, "Things about Nicky and .. and you."

Sid's brows knit together, "Me? What about me?"

"He say you two .. have sex lots." Evgeni says slowly, "He says you slut for hockey player .. and-and you like rough."

"He said that? And you believed it?"

"I just .. I snap, okay? I hit him with no thinking." Evgeni explains, "It not right for him say that or do that. Not right for anyone and," he coughs, "I doubt you like that, but I know how Sanja is and I .. I." He stops himself, unable to find the right words.

Sidney blinks a few times, taking it all in, "Alex is the only person I've ever been with and .. he'd never do that to me. Ever."

"I know I just." Geno stops again,tucking a loose curl behind Sid's ear, "I care 'bout you."

"I care about you too Geno." The Canadian returns, "But you can't fight people because they say something about me."

Evgeni nods, running his thumb up and down Sidney's jaw. The smaller man seems to lean into his touch, his eyes showing how truly concerned he is.

Honestly, he's never felt so in love, so mesmerized by this man's beauty, than he is right now.

He knows later he'll regret cupping Sidney's cheek and slowly pressing their lips together. Right now, he can't bring himself to care.

He especially doesn't care when Sidney kisses him back.

Evgeni loses himself a little. Nearly forcing his tongue inside Sid's mouth and his hands sliding down to feel that perfect ass.

They carefully back track over to the couch, Geno gently pushes his captain on his back and climbs on top of him. Sidney pulls on the collar of Malkin's shirt, so he sheds it and tosses it on the floor.

He goes back in for another kiss, and Sidney meets him halfway. He has one hand tugging at the Russian's hair and the other digging into his shoulder. Evgeni pushes Sidney's shirt up to his chest, fingers tracing the pale flesh. He grounds down onto the smaller man, a mutual moan vibrating through the kiss.

He unbuttons Sidney's jeans, sliding a hand down his boxers and holding his cock. His captain's hips buck upwards and he groans.

This moment couldn't be more perfect.

"Zhenya, sorry I'm - What the fuck?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope this chapter was enjoyable and wasn't written poorly. Thanks for all the support.


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was really hard to write for me because there were several different scenarios I could have chosen. I narrowed the list down to two and meticulously plotted out every little detail until the end. I decided to choose the one I did to shows you what hitting rock bottom means (in here anyways)..
> 
> While doing my plotting, I realized that the furthest I can stretch this out to is chapter twenty one, which I probably won't take it that far since it'll be so short. I almost cried. I mean, I've spent nearly eight months working on this and its almost done. My goal has always been to make it to at least chapter twenty, so I'll be satisfied with closing it then and working on my other fics. I'll be sad to see it end but it kinda has to .. I guess ..
> 
> Sorry for making you a part of my pity party, i'm probably the only one who's sad about this.
> 
> In other happy news, I posted a Sid/Geno one shot yesterday. I'm hoping to turn it into a series, but I need some help with that. If anyone is interested, go read "Cover of a Magazine" and the info you'll need - after reading it of course - is at the bottom.
> 
> I'm super sorry for this being so long. Onto the important stuff..
> 
> I hope you all like this chapter and its packed with drama - you may need some tissues if you're hyper sensitive like me.
> 
> As always, any and all feedback is greatly appreciated :)

Chapter 18:

Sidney pushes Geno off of him and scurries off to the other side of the couch, "Alex. Oh my god. This .. this .."

Alex stares at him, tears brimming his lids and hurt shining through his eyes. Sid feels like such a piece of shit. He just wanted Geno to leave him alone - once and for all. He thought that maybe if they kissed one final time it would all stop ..

And Alex walks through the door. He can't catch a fucking break.

He barely hears Geno mumble something, probably in Russian since he's looking straight at Alex. Ovie runs a hand through his hair and sighs.

"I should .. go." Alex eventually says.

Sid jumps up, "No! How about we-we talk about this."

"Sid there's-"

"Please."

"But-"

" _Please._ "

Ovechkin sighs and closes his eyes for a second, "Sure."

Sidney walks over to him, his chest tightens and his throat closes a little, he gulps loudly before saying, "Look, Alex, I love you and what happened it .. it .. doesn't..." he stops himself, trying to search for something other than 'it doesn't mean anything'.

"If you love me then you wouldn't kiss someone else." Alex points out.

"I know that. And I'm sorry but I-"

"We done talking." Ovie says and quickly storms out the house.

Sidney nearly has to run to keep up, "Alex, you have to understand that I don't feel the same way about him that I do you. I love you and I-"

The Russian abruptly stops and spins on his heels, "How you say you love me when you kiss Zhenya? How you love me when you go on dates with him?"

"They weren't dates! We were trying to rebuild the friendship we lost!"

"Right, because Zhenya clearly not delusional to think love is mutual, or is he right?" Alex barks.

"Geno and I are just friends, okay?" Sid snaps before stepping back and taking a deep breath, "Believe it or not, I really do love you and I don't want to lose you .. but if you don't want to be with me anymore I understand." He crosses his arms over his torso as his heart beats through his ribcage.

Alex runs a hand through the smaller man's hair and kisses his forehead, "Goodbye Sid. Was good while it lasted."

Sidney opens his mouth to say - to say something, he doesn't know what. But his mouth would open and his throat swells up. Ovie caresses his cheek, stroking a thumb along his jaw, and brushes their lips together - so soft Sid could barely feel it - before jumping in his car and speeding away.

Sidney watches the only man he's ever loved drive away, tears starting to spill over. He considers jumping in his own vehicle and chasing the man down, but realizes he left his shoes inside the house. He contemplates leaving them there (he has more) but decides against it.

Its probably better to bitch somewhere other than at the rink.

When he walks inside, he finds Geno with his face buried in his hands. He looks up when the door makes a soft clicking noise. And Sidney sees something he's never seen before.

Tears.

"I sorry about .. that," Evgeni apologizes eventually, "I thought I love you .. but maybe Sanja right .."

Sid sits beside Geno and takes the other glass and sips from it, "How so?"

"I-I .. I in love with Nicky, but he only want casual sex sometimes. And I to afraid of what he say to change that," Geno stops to take a sip of his drink, "Thought maybe it would be easier if I love you so I convince myself I do and then you and Sanja happen."

"Geno-"

"If you hate me and you no want talk to me anymore, understand."

Sidney puts his glass on the table and rests his head on the other man's shoulder, "I could never hate you, and I couldn't go a day without talking to you if I tried."

Malkin wraps his arm around the smaller man, holding him close and pressing a kiss to his hair. Sid presses closer, feeling the warmth of his larger body before letting the first tear slide. It didn't take long before he was sobbing, unable to control himself, and he could feel the top of his hair getting wet.

Alex was the only thing he knew for certain would be there when hockey ended. But now, he's not sure if has a future.

Or if he even wants one.

...

"What the fuck do you want me to do?!" James yells, he can't believe they're arguing about this, "I can't tell them I don't want to be traded. It doesn't work like that Paulie!"

He thought telling his partner about the possibility of him being traded during the next off season would have been a good thing, maybe even bring them closer. After all, aren't the most important things in a relationship honesty and communication?

When he told Paulie about his talk with Mario and Ray today, the ginger screaming, telling him everything was his fault. Ever since James had introduced his boyfriend to his parents - who are the most important people in his life - that's all Paul has done.

"Maybe if you stopped playing like shit you wouldn't be fucking traded." Martin growls.

Something in Nealsy snaps. Its one thing to attack him personally - say what you want, he knows who he is and who he isn't - but its another to insult his game.

"You know what. Fuck you Paul." James replies, his blood boiling, "You have no right standing there acting like you're a fucking God. The defense has been falling apart recently. We've been relying on Flower and our first two lines to win games. Of course you wouldn't know that because your head is to far up your _ass_."

Nealer grabs his bag from the couch and slings his jacket over his shoulder.

"James. James, where the fuck do you think you're going?"

"Its none of your fucking business because as far as I'm concerned we're done."

James slams the door behind him and starts driving, going slightly beyond the speed limit. He hadn't realized he was heading in the direction of Geno's house until he pulled into his teammate's driveway.

When he opens the door using the spare key Geno gave him in case he and Paulie fought and he needed a place to crash (at the time James thought it was ridiculous because the idea of him and his then-perfect boyfriend arguing seemed impossible, but now he's very grateful) he finds Malkin and Sidney holding each other. Sid crying into the other man's shirt while the Russian's tears fall into his hair.

Neither of them say anything. Geno just holds out his arm and James takes the invitation to curl up on his free side and let the tears loose.

He remembers when he and Paulie first got together. It was amazing how happy they were, how they seemed to be so right for each other. Some of the older guys said this was just the honeymoon stage and things were going to get harder. James shrugged it off, claiming that he and Paulie would always be this happy, this perfect.

Oh, how things had changed in so little time.

He thinks about how Sidney and Geno - two of the toughest and strongest guys he ever met - crying, just like he is. He remembers that the Capitals are in town. So maybe Sid and Alex broke up? It seems unlikely that would happen - they always seemed so happy, so right for each other.

Isn't Geno with Bäckström? They never seemed serious, but the way they looked at each other held every showed how deep their love was. Did they break up too? No, they couldn't of. They always seemed so -

_happy and right for each other_

Maybe this whole love thing isn't what he thought it was.

Maybe it isn't even worth it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry. For everything. Please dont hate me.


	19. Home is Wherever You Are

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Unless you've been living under a rock for the past month of so, then you know that hockey started again. Normally, I'd be freaking the fuck out. But the Penguins got their first lost last night. So that sucks some serious balls..
> 
> In other bad news ....
> 
> This has one more chapter, after this. After six months of work, my favorite fic is going to end *sobs* (this probably isn't as depressing for you as it is for me). After this is closed, I'll start working on some of my other fics. My goal is to wrap up Not Your Fault and then try and work with some of my other stories, but we'll see how that goes. I'll probably end up doing a Jack/Sid that ends up as an Alex/Sid or a Claude/Sid/Max, but it depends on what I feel like doing. I should probably work on my other fics but the chance of that happening are not likely.
> 
> I want to thank everyone who has read this and stuck by this work - and me .. hopefully - this entire time. It means the world to me, you don't even know. I really hope you enjoy the ending, I had a few different scenarios rolling around in my mind but I decided to go with this one.
> 
> Thank you guys for everything. And please remember, all feedback is greatly appreciated :)

Home is Wherever You Are

When Sidney was done with their little pity party - more because the closeness and warmth of Geno's house was making him sweat - he bid Geno and James a goodbye and promised to see them that night at the game.

As he walks out, he checks his phone. About fife teen ''death threats'' probably from some of the Russian players (how they got his number he'll never understand).and two from Jonny, so he decides to call him later.

Instead he drives home, doing his best to focus on the road. Once he reaches his driveway, his phone buzzes in his pocket. He considers letting it go to voicemail .. but he obviously doesn't have good decision making skills, so, despite not knowing the number, he answers it.

"Hello?"

"Hey .. its Nicky."

Sid blinks in surprise, "Oh, hi Nicky."

"I just talked to Alex about what happened and he's pretty upset. So am I, actually." Nicklas says, "I don't want you to apologize or try to justify yourself, I only want to know what happened."

Sighing, Sidney tells him the entire story. Afterwards, he feels like more of a piece of shit than he already did. Bäckström doesn't say anything for the longest time, making his stomach churn even more.

"Do you .. do you love him?" Nicky asks.

"No. No, I only love Alex." Sid replies, "And Geno doesn't love me either. He loves you."

He hears some shuffling around and sniffling in the background, but no other noise is made between them. He barely hears the small "Bye" on the other end before the call is ended.

Getting out of his car, he goes instead to take a quick shower and heads to Mario's. He'd love to sit there and mope all day, but that wouldn't do any good.

...

Nicky presses the end button and turns to Alex, "I'll be right back."

Sanja doesn't say anything - he probably should though, its the polite thing to do. But he figures silence is the best option for them right now, not that he'd know what to say anyways. When Backy had dialed a number and turned on the speaker phone he should have known who it was, but he was still startled to hear Sidney's voice.

His throat swelled shut and his chest tightened up. They had broken up a few hours ago, and normally the sting would have subsided by now (when Maria Kirilenko dumped him it took an hour and a bottle of vodka to completely forget about it). But with Sidney, it hurts so damn much.

Maybe what hurt the most is thinking about the gold engagement ring his grandmother gave to him that's hidden at the bottom of his travel case that he planned to use this summer. Or maybe it was because he had yearned so much for Sidney, long before he met Maria or any of those random girls, and being with him had truly been a dream come true. Or it could be the fact that he'd been willing to give up his career and possibly disappoint his country to be with the man he loved, the only person he's ever been in love with. Maybe it was because Sidney was the only person he wanted to talk to, and go to sleep with every night and wake up to every morning, and the last person he'd ever make love to. The only person whose hand he wanted to hold, or whose lips he wanted to kiss.

Alex wipes his eyes this king about that last part. He remembers the night like it was yesterday. He always figured Sidney liked guys, but seeing those pictures had proved it to him. His heart raced the entire flight and he kept wiping his sweaty palms on his jeans. He had this whole speech planned, but once Sidney walked into the room he forgot every word (and temporarily his English). Luckily, Sid never heard him whisper _I love you_ (not that he would've known what Alex was saying anyways since he doesn't speak Russian).

Kissing Sidney had blown his mind. When they made love for the first time, it had been .. beyond words. Easily the best moment of his life, and it will always will be.

_even if we never do it again_

Sanja tries to blink away his tears and take even breaths, but he can't stop himself from bursting out into a sob. He cries even harder when Nicky wraps his arms around him.

He's not mad at Zhenya, he understands why his best friend acts the way he does (he's been completely miserable since Oksana left for good and apparently he loves Nicklas, so it all makes sense). And after hearing about what happened, he's not mad at Sidney either.

He's mad at himself. He's mad at himself for not being attractive enough. For never taking things seriously. For falling in love so easily, and letting his heart trick him into thinking he actually stood a chance.

Most of all, he's mad at himself for never being good enough for anyone, especially someone as gorgeous and amazing as Sidney.

~

Alex wanted to call, but Nicky makes sure he didn't. Lecturing him multiple times about how he's "being impulsive" and to "give it time". So he calls Sasha instead, complaining to him about everything and anything.

When its finally game time, his heart plummets. Not just because _he's_ there, but because he looks just as wrecked as Alex feels. Bags under his sad hazel eyes, which stay glued to the ice. His shoulders slumped and his tape all crooked. Suddenly, Alex feels like a piece of shit.

He should've called.

When the puck drops, he expects things to go from bad to complete shit. Normally, Sidney isn't afraid to hit him into the boards or steal the puck from him. Today, however, Sid is pulling back and turns over the puck more times than Paul Bissonnette gets scratched.

Sanja tries to make contact with him, but he always turns his gaze somewhere else, his eyes glistening. He feels bad - kind of, anyways. He knows it's not technically his fault, but the idea of hurting Sid - both physically and emotionally - makes his heart crack.

Green and Laich both get goals in the first with Neal scoring during a power play not long after. Orpik finds the back of the net minutes into the second period. Both team's goalies act like brick walls for the rest of the period.

Sidney takes a stupid penalty - another one, really - half way into the third. He forces his stick in between Dmitry Orlov's legs in an attempt to get the puck, but he completely fails and trips the defenseman. His face red from frustration as he enters the penalty box. The Penguins seemed flustered after that, as if it wasn't the fifth time they were short handed solely because of their captain.

Letang, Martin, Maatta, and Niskanen - that's his name, right? - can't get their shit together. Fleury didn't seem to concerned about their situation until the defense men started to scramble. With the Pens panicking, it wasn't that hard for Alex to find the back of the net.

For what could possibly be the first time in his career, he doesn't celebrate his own goal.

"You just won the fucking game Ovie!" Nicky yells at him through the crowd's loud boos. Which was proven right because no one even had a shot on goal as the clock hit zero.

The handshake line is horrifying, for him at least. He keeps expecting Fleury or someone to punch him in the face. But none of them even send him a glare, which makes him assume Sidney hadn't told them. 

"Sidney loves you, only loves you. He doesn't want to be with anyone else. I can't explain what happened, but it was a mistake." Zhenya says, giving his hand and shoulder a firm squeeze, "Talk to him, please."

Alex gives him a tight smile and continues to shake Orpik's hand and doesn't stop even when Neal growls "You're lucky he loves you or I'd snap your neck" or when he gets to Sidney, who keeps his eyes forward and barely touches him.

"Sid-" Sanja starts, but forces himself to stop when the other man's hazel eyes find his.

Those eyes shows how guilty Sidney really is. How much he's been beating himself up and how he feels so bad. Tears threaten to spill from both of their eyes and Alex forces himself to look away and move on, but he doesn't miss the soft "I love you".

He feels his throat swell up as Nicky throws an arm around his shoulders and tells him he did good, that this is their year.

But the Cup doesn't feel that important right now.

...

Sidney barely manages to get back into the locker room before the first tear slides out, which he quickly wipes away. Geno squeezes his shoulder and murmurs "You talk."

He doesn't have the ability to open his throat to protest, so he shuffles to his stall to change.

Today has easily been the worst day of his entire life. Not only did he lose the only person he's ever truly loved, but he played like complete shit and lost the game for the team with his dumb penalties. He could blame it on the defense or their constant scrambling, but at the end of the day he knows he fucked up bad and won't blame it on anyone else.

Seeing Alex had rattled him, reinforced the fact that he could never move on even if he tried. That Alex would be the only person who he wanted to be. Seeing his ex would constantly remind him that he would never find anyone else, not that he'd want to.

Sidney breezes through the questions. Giving his bland, emotionless answers that may or may not answer the actual question. None of the guys say anything, but James gives him a really long hug before leaving. Paulie winces when the door slams shut and escapes without anyone saying a word.

The room is usually tense after a lose, but it hasn't been this bad since the playoffs of 2008.

Sidney's fully undressed and he's about to leave when his phone rings, its Jonny. Sighing, he steps out of the rom and leans against the wall to answer.

"Hey Jon." He visibly cringes when his voice cracks.

"Oh, uh, hey Sid. I just watched the game and, uh .." Jonny pauses, "You alright?"

"No, not really," Sid replies honestly, "I'm a fucking mess, really."

"Did you and Alex .. you know?" Jon asks, "Because if you guys did, then it will.. it'll be okay. You shouldn't, you shouldn't ruin your game like that. That's not only bad for but bad for your team."

"I know Jonny I just," Sidney sighs, "I just don't want him to _not_ be there, does that make sense?"

"You love him, right?"

"More than anything."

"Then go after him. Find him and _fight_ for him. Do whatever it takes to make sure he _is_ there and always will be."

Sid runs a hand through his hair, "I doubt he wants to talk to me."

"Oh Sid," Tazer sighs, "Did I ever tell you about what happened between Kaner and I when we first got together?"

"No, but-"

"I felt so bad about what happened that I avoided Kaner because I didn't think he wanted to talk to me," Toews explains, "After a week goes by, Pat corners me in the shower - while I was totally naked - and then we talked," He pauses for effect, "Forget the fact that you're incredibly hot and probably look even better naked for a second. So, unless you want Ovechkin to barge into the Penguins locker room after practice and demand to exchange words while you try and get the soap out of your hair, I suggest you go find him."

"Thanks Jon." Sid says and hangs up. How he ever ended up with a friend like Jonathan Toews, he'll never understand.

"There you are Sid!" Mario says, wrapping an arm around him.

"I'm really sorry I played like shit. I-"

"Sid, we all have our bad games. After all, you're only human," Mario squeezes his shoulder, "Now, where's that boyfriend of yours? I want to invite him over for dinner."

Sid's throat tightens, " Actually-"

"We already plans. Very sorry. Maybe come over for breakfast?"

Sidney's heart clenches and his stomach twists. His breathing comes in short, rough gasps. Mario either doesn't notice or he's to polite to say anything, "I'll let you two kids go. Have fun, but not to much okay?"

Alex grins, "No promises."

Sid turns to him, "Alex-"

"'S okay. Forgive you."

Sidney blinks, "Really? I would understand if you're upset or felt betrayed."

"Love you Sid. All that matters." Ovie says and runs a hand through the smaller man's wet curls.

Sidney breaths a sigh of relief, "Good. Because I love you too. A lot."

"I got you birthday presents." Alex says, "I only bring one but rest in Washington when we play."

"Why couldn't you bring them?" Sid asks.

Ovie throws an arm around his shoulders and shrugs, "Too big. Besides, have better plans for tonight."

~

"My birthday present is lubricant?"

Alex rolls his eyes and takes it from him, "Is special lubricant. Make you feel extra good."

"How?" Sidney asks, his brows knitting together.

The Russian presses their lips together for a soft and sweet kiss, "I show you." He says and grabs Sid's hand to lead him upstairs.

"If this doesn't work I'm going to tell Nicky and he's going to tell your team. Then you'll be the laughingstock of DC." Sid teases.

As a ''punishment'', he's shoved up against the bedroom wall and his clothes are torn off, probably ripped in several places.

(He doesn't regret it.)

...

Evgeni stuffs his hands into his pockets (God, he's turning into Sidney) and watches Nicky's car pull into his driveway.

"You waiting for me?" Nicky asks as he gets out.

Evgeni gives a stiff smile, "Figure you come."

"So, uh, Sidney told me that you're, you know, " Nicklas looks down at his feet, "You're in love with me. Is that true?"

"Yeah."

Nicklas nods, "I'm in love with you too, you know. I always thought that you and Sidney were .. Liking together, or going to be and we were just about the sex. And,uh . then h3 got with Alex and I .. I got scared thinking maybe you felt the same and I thought I wasn't ready ..but I am now if you are."

Malkin smiles and grabs the Swede's hand, "Come inside and I show how much I love you."

Nicky grins, "Okay."

...

 

"Was that Sidney?" Kaner asks as Jonny comes back into the living room.

"Yeah," Jon sighs, "I guess him and Alex broke up, don't know why, but they're going to talk about it,I guess. He's so confusing sometimes."

Patrick stretches out on the couch, "Good thing we're not like that anymore, right?"

Tazer grabs a couch pillow and taps his feet with it, "Move asshole before I lay on you."

...

 

"James!" Paul yells, "James! Stop fucking walking!"

James stops abruptly and whips around, "What the fuck do you want, huh? To scream at me for being such a fucking failure? Huh? Would that make you happy?"

"No babe. I just wanna talk," Martin says, "I didn't mean what I said, okay? I was-"

"I don't wanna hear your damn excuses and I don't wanna talk about it. Just," James closes his eyes, "Just leave me alone'"

"James please."

"No Paul. What you said really fucking hurt okay. I already get enough shit from everyone else, but hearing it from you fucking stung. Especially when you said that I'm not good. There's no coming back from that for m e. There's just .. I can't forgive you for that. If you said it out of anger then that's what you truly meant." Nealsy says.

"I don't actually think that and I'm not mad at you." Paulie persists, "I'm mad at them for trying to take you away from me. I don't think I could live without you here." When James doesn't say anything he adds, "I'm real!y fucking sorry. I didn't. Ran it like that. I thought that . maybe if we all played better and you shined then they'd keep you and we could still be together."

"Just because I get traded doesn't mean we can't still date. " James points out.

"I know that,I do," the defenseman says, "But it wouldn't be the same without waking up next to you, or when you come over for breakfast still half asleep. When we sneak into each others rooms on road trips. Or when we sit next too each other on the plane and I get to watch you sleep."

Nealer blinks rapidly, "So what do you want to do?"

Paul shrugs, "I don't know. But we don't have to decide right now, do we?"

"No we don't." James says and looks down at his feet, "But I think we should take a break until we figure it out."

"James-"

"Goodbye Paul." James says and quickly walks away, never turning around.

Paulie feels his heart shatter into pieces. He never should've said what he did. He honestly hadn't meant to. He's just so in love with James that the thought of spending a single moment without him. Also, he isn't stupid. He knows that James is attractive and he isn't the best looking person alive. He doubt's Nealer would cheat on him purposefully, but distance can change people (and there's the fact that James loves alcohol to deal with).

He doesn't want to lose James by any means. But how could he even consider a life where he's always wondering where his boyfriend is or what he's doing?

Pat extends his arms as if asking for a hug, "Be my guest."

With a smirk plastered on his face, Jon lays down on his boyfriend and kisses him fiercely, getting a hand underneath his boxers. The movie on the TV completely forgotten.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I absolutely love BizNasty, but if he can joke about himself so can I, right? (Right?!)
> 
> I didn't really go into detail, but here Maria and Alex dated for like a hear or whatever and then broke up. Blah blah blah. Then Sidney came out and yeah .. Oksana and Geno still had that on and off thing but ended it in like 2010 or whatever.
> 
> I hope this was not to bad or something and I really hope you liked it.
> 
> Remember, all feedback is greatly appreciated :)


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just to let you know, the Capitals vs Penguins game was based off the game last season on January 15th. It was technically in Pittsburgh, but we're pretending it wasn't ..
> 
> So this is like .. really, really sad for me. I hope this last chapter lives up to your standards, because its exceeded mine.
> 
> I don't really have a lot to say here. Except thank you for reading through twenty chapters plus an epilogue. I hope you all have a fantastic week after this, that all your teams win (unless they're not the Penguins or Capitals), and that you'll read some of my other works if you find one that tickles your fancy.
> 
> Anyways, so I love you guys. Follow me on Twitter @Candace_Chamber if you can, thank you. And for the last time in this fic. Please remember, all feedback is greatly appreciated. :) thank you.

Chapter 20:

That morning, Alex had woken up earlier than Sidney and when he came down stairs, the Russian was staring intently at his phone, "Everything okay?"

Alex peers up at him, "Call parents."

Sidney's brows knit together, "Oh? Well, uh, tell them I said hi."

"Want tell them about us." Alex explains, "And about come out."

Sid blinks, he did not just hear what he thought he did, "Huh?"

"Been think for while that we be together if came out too. I know how is in Russia. But I be part living anywhere as long as you there." Ovie says and half smiles.

"Alex, this isn't a temporary thing. It won't just go away. You might be banned from Russia forever, and you won't allow to complete in Olympics. And-"

"Know what risks are Sid. But you more important." Alex interrupts and brings the phone to his ear.

"I don't mind you telling your parents, but we should keep our relationship private." Sidney says and the kitchen chair beside his boyfriend. He remembers what happened with his parents and the nightmare that veering was. But the worst part wasn't the rejection, it was that he went through it alone.

Sid pays with the Russian's hand as he speaks slow and steady on the phone, stopping constantly and chewing on his bottom lip. His voice gets harsher and his whole body tenses. Sidney can see the tears forming in his eyes, so he leans on Alex's shoulders and presses as close to him as he can. Eventually, Alex sighs and hangs up.

"How was it?" Sidney asks quietly, moving so he can look into the Russian's eyes.

Alex shrugs, "They say they okay with it if what I want. Love me either way."

Sid starts chewing on his bottom lip anxiously, "Is it what you want to do? Because there's no backing out of this once its done."

"Want to tell everyone that you mine. Not want hide anymore." Alex says and looks at him with those big, hopeful eyes. As much as Sidney would hate for this to ruin Alex's life, he cant really control it, can he? He'd love to be able to hold hands with his boyfriend and kiss him out in public - but at what cost?

At the end of the day, this is what Alex wants, "Okay. Lets do it." Sidney says.

~

Breakfast at the Lemieux's had gone great. Alex really hit it off with the kids and while Sidney helped Nathalie clean, had a nice conversation with Mario. Neither of them specifically said what it was about, but the slightly horrified look on Alex's face says that it wasn't the best talk to have at a dinner table. Mario isn't necessarily violent, but he can be pretty intimidating when he wants to be.

"So, Alex here told me about he wants to tell the public about your relationship." Mario begins.

"Yes. We talked about it this morning."

"I seriously hope you know what you're doing. I mean, do you know what the media is going to do to you two? Or what the other players will do? I mean, we all saw what happened to Sidney, but it'll be ten times worse if you tell everyone that you're together. There's always going to be that ignorant guy on the other bench to make a homophobic joke about one of you to the other and you're going to get riled up, and I'm not going to deal with you taking stupid penalties Sid and I'm sure Oates will agree." Mario lectures, "I want the best for you two, and I'll gladly defend you day in and day out, I'm not so sure about Oates on this one though. Now, are you sure you can handle this?"

Sidney looks at Alex and entwines their fingers together, "Yeah, one hundred percent." Alex smiles, "Same. Oates be fired next season anyway."

"Are you seriously trying to make a joke right now?" The corners of Mario's mouth twitch upwards and he struggles to keep a serious expression. "Okay just .. whatever. I'm sure Alex has talked to his agent, why don't you call JP and set it up for when we go to DC next? Sound like a plan?" He looks between the two of two.

"Yeah. It's a plan." Sidney says and forces a smile. He hopes he looks call on the outside because he's starting to freak the fuck out on the inside.

How does anyone not see how bad of a plan this is? Is anyone but him worried about how Alex's country will react? Or how _Alex_ will react to the rejection? What about his teammates? They seemed to more tolerate the fact that he and Sidney are together more than really like it (with the exception of Nicky and Sasha, of course). How will they react to this news?

Don't get him wrong. He wants nothing more than to be allowed to kiss the Russian in public or hold hands as they walk down the street and do all the things they want without having to hide. But he doesn't want Ovie to think over his decision and realize what a mistake this all was. According to everyone else, it's not Sidney's decision, he knows this. Shouldn't he have a say in this though? He is going to be roped into this just as much as Alex is.

As much as Sid loves Alex, he doesn't want to play the role of a supportive boyfriend for all the media to see if Russia bans them both from ever setting a foot back over there.

"Are you sure about this? Absolutely no doubts?" Sidney asks as Alex is about to leave for his plane later that day.

Alex smiles and presses a soft kiss to his lips, "No doubts Sid. We do this, okay? Make us official."

He likes the sound of that, but not what will inevitably come afterwards.

~

Sidney will shamefully admit that he's been kind of burying himself in hockey. Pushing himself way beyond what he should be when he exercises, staying on the ice way to long after practice, etc. At the end of the day, he's exhausted, but they're scoring a lot, they're winning (a lot), and he's leading the NHL in point. Granted, the points don't matter. He's said before that he'd take a nineteen game winning streak over a nineteen game scoring streak any day, and he gladly stands by that.

(But its still kind of cool to see his name at the top.)

The Penguins are on a five game winning streak so far, and its a great feeling to have when they land in Washington. Of course, all that joy slowly starts to dissipate from him as him and Geno drive to Alex's house. Geno keeps throwing him weird glances the entire ride. So when they pull up into the driveway, Sid keeps the doors locked and turns to Geno.

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

Malkin gulps, "Alex, uh, tell me he come out too and I .." he pauses, looking for the words, "You no stop him? Try talk him out?"

"I did try G. But he wouldn't listen to me. You know how he is when he sets his mind on something." Sid replies and Geno sighs.

"I'm know. This not like going get chocolate cake not on diet or get drunk even if game tomorrow, Sid. This is life and I-"

"I don't want that to happen to him either. This is what Alec wants and he's not letting anyone talk him out of it, not even Mario. So I'm going to be a supportive boyfriend on his right and I hope you can be the understanding best friend on his left." Sid says and tries his best to look stern, and he must do a pretty good job because Geno mumbles his agreement and gets out of the car.

"Zhenya! Sid!" Alex says from his porch, holding out his arms. Malkin looks at him with this weird smirk on his face and steps past him into the house. Sidney stops at looks at Alex before stepping into the hug, "I hope you know you're an idiot."

Alex chuckles, " _Your_ idiot."

Sidney pulls back to look up at him and teases him, saying, "Can't you take anything seriously for once?"

Ovie mocks hurt, "Yes!" He turns Sidney around and covers his eyes with those big calloused hands of his. "Now keep move till I say you stop." Sid rolls his eyes - not that it does him any good - and reluctantly does what he's told. Only Alex would do something like this.

"Stop." Alex instructs and removes his hands, "Happy birthday!"

Sidney stares at the object in front of him and he isn't sure whether he should laugh or cry, because this _has_ to be some sort of sick joke. There's no way Alex would do _this_.. Or maybe he would.

"Alex, please tell me this is a joke."

Ovie smirks - fucking _smirks_ , "Nope. Birthday present number one."

Sidneys mouth falls open and his stomach flip flops, "Out of how many?"

Ovie just winks - the fucker - and refuses to answer the question. Instead, he brings Sidney inside to show him.

Oh boy.

~

Sid pulls into the parking lot as some of the other guys do, and receives some whistles when he gets out of his car. He hopes he's not blushing, or that they cant see him blush. Because that would be even more embarrassing than this whole situation.

"Ovechkin buy you a car, eh?" Flower says, this stupidly large grin on his stupid French face.

"Among other things." Sidney says and flashes his new phone - new _I_ Phone, to be exact - in Marc's face, which also shows off his new gold bracelet. Flower whistles, loud enough for everyone in the parking lot (and possibly China) to hear.

"What's the bracelet say?" Fleury asks, bouncing up and down on his heels with excitement.

Sidney blushes so hard its not even funny, "Its says um .... Sidney Ovechkin 87."

Flower's stupid face lights up and he nearly shouts, "Aw! That is _so_ cute!"

Geno nearly pushes Flower over to make him quiet down, "What cute?"

"Sid's boyfriend proposed!"

"No he didn't! Don't listen to that fuck face!" Sidney protests, his face impossibly getting warmer, "Alex just got me a bracelet that has my first name, his last name, and my number. Its not a proposal."

"And Ovechkin bought him a phone and a car." Flower says, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

"Damn Sid," Tanger bumps shoulders with him, "I hoped you let him go down on you or else you're officially the worst boyfriend ever."

"Will you guys hush!" Sidney whines and starts walking away from them quickly. Geno is able to keep up with him without much effort though.

"Really is cute. Hope you know that." Malkin says, poking his side.

Sid smiles, "I know." He sighs, "but the bracelet would've been good, you know? I didn't need the car and the phone."

Geno chuckles, "He not done yet."

Sidney gives a death glare because he will not be accepting anymore gifts from anyone for at least another year. Maybe even longer. Unless its hockey stuff. He's okay with hockey stuff. He tells Geno, who shakes his head and laughs at him. Sid hip checks him as they enter the locker room, which starts a playful shoving match before he bursts into a fit of giggles and tells the Russian he surrenders.

~

The game is clean (mostly) and fair (if the zebras are actually blind). There aren't a lot of penalties on either side. Only Drazenovic and Malkin (twice) get them penalties, which is alright. They only go on the power play four times from the Capitals. Which doesn't matter because no one scores on them anyways.

The Caps decided to rest Holtby and put in Neuvirth, which turns out to be a god sent for the Pens because the game ends with a 4-5 for the Pens. Tanger, Pyatt, Jussi, and Olli scoring. With Sidney, Glass, OIlli, Jussi, Suttsy, Nisky, and Geno getting assists respectively. Laich, Chimera, and Alex score for the Capitals. Neuvirth doesn't do to horrible, but Flower does a lot better. Olli, Jussi, and Alex are the game's three stars. And Sidney is happy for Alex. He had a good game and he deserves to get recognition.

Besides, the Penguins won and that's _all_ that matters.

"You ready?" Alex asks and wiggles his eyebrows. A new kind of panic rises up inside of Sidney and threatens to spew out of his throat.

 _It' okay. It's okay.. It's okay. It's always okay._ Sidney repeats inside his head because its the only thing that's soothing him right now. The large, warm hand Alex has holding onto his smaller one makes him relax. Then he realizes that it's not to calm him down, but to guide him to the conference room and _holy shit we're going to the conference room. Okay, okay. Relax. It's okay. It's okay.._

Alex holds the door open for him with a weird look on his face. Sidney takes one look into those blue eyes he loves so much and finds uncertainty mixed with determination. Sid gives a small smile and drops Alex's hand before stepping inside.

All eyes are fixed on them and cameras are flashing uncontrollably. Sidney slowly forces himself to sit down _holy shit, this is actually happening. Okay, relax_. Alex looks calm, which - why is Sidney freaking out? _He's_ already been through this. _He's_ not about to make the biggest move of his life. So he shouldn't be freaking out, right?

Right?

He watches Mario come in a few seconds later and manages not to burst out of his seat and spill everything he's feeling. But he knows better. So he nods a greeting and stares at the table like it's the most interesting thing in the world. He hears Alex and Mario exchange words, but they're whispering so he doesn't hear them.

"Good evening everyone," Mario says and flashes a smile, "Normally I'd let you guys start asking questions right away, but Mr. Ovechkin would like to make an announcement first.

The reports exchange confused glances but give Alex all their attention anyway.

Alex licks his lips, "Sidney has been face of hockey for long time, but now he also face of You Can Play. He inspire lot of people like Jonathan Toews and Patrick Kane," he pauses to let out a shaky breath, "Sid also inspire me to tell you that I'm .. bisexual."

...

Johnny's jaw drops because - what? Did that seriously just happen?

"They definitely talked it out." Kaner says.

Jon snorts and turns off the TV, "Let's not talk about that right now, okay?"

"Sounds good-" Patrick starts, but the words are cut off by Johnny's lips pressed against his.

...

Zhenya stares at the TV, his emotions mixed. He's happy for them, but why hadn't Sanja told him about this?

"Hey babe, wanna join me in the shower?"

Zhenya turns round to see Nicky standing there with a white towel hanging loosely on his hips. He looks at theg TV, the reports are still in shock and are all speaking loudly and taking pictures. 

Waiting for the reports, or have sex with his boyfriend?

"Coming." Zhenya says and jumps up off the couch.

...

Sidney blinks and resists the urge to cover his ears because - holy shit, do these people have manners?

"Okay. One at a time." Mario says, loudly enough to make everyone cringe and close their mouths.

"Chad from NBC," a guy in the back says, "Do you plan on partnering up with You Can Play?"

"I would like to, yes."

"Are you afraid of what your country will say?"

Pain flashes across Alex's face but quickly goes away, "I love my country, but I don't want keep hiding. And, um, I hope they accept that. Uh, and I hope I able to represent Russia whenever I can."

"Sidney, what do you have to say about your rival coming out?"

Sid looks at Alex, "Well, I wouldn't exactly call us rivals. But, um, takes a lot of courage to come out. And it's a real honor to play with people like Alex, Toews, and Kane."

"Do you think four of the games' biggest stars coming out will change the game as we know it?"

Ovie gestures for him to answer, so Sidney clears his throat, "I think that it won't change the game, but how people view hockey and the NHL."

"Alex, do you have a partner? And is it serious?"

Alex smiles and looks at Sidney, "I do and it's very serious." He says and grabs Sid's hand, making him blush.

It's dead silent for a second - an entire second - before the reporters start shouting their questions and legitimately flipping their own shit.

Mario stands up and ushers them out with security on their heels. Alex sets an arm around his shoulders and Sidney leans into him. He hears the Russian's heart beating, rapidly.

"It'll be okay. It's always okay." Sidney whispers and peers up at Alex, who looks down at him and smiles.

"Be okay if you're here."Alex says and kisses the top of his head.

"Save that corny shit for when you're alone, alright?" Mario teases, a half smile on his face.

"Hush or I'll tell Nathalie how you forgot her birthday." Sid fake threatens.

"That was last year!" Mario says.

Alex chuckles and tightens his arm around Sidney's shoulders, "Never forget your birthday, or anything about you."

Mario snorts, "Wait five years then."

"Ignore him. He's an ass."

Alex kisses the top of his head and doesn't respond. Sidney catches Mario staring at them when they reach the parking lot, a big grin on his face.

He doesn't know what will happen next, but he knows it will be fine if these two men are by his side.

~

It hadn't taken much for Alex to convince Sidney to come to Russia after the Penguins are kicked out of the playoffs by the Rangers. Just a simple "Please" and a bat of the eyelashes and Sid was on a plane.

Geno had brought Nicky along. They're so in love, and they're so cute together. It warms his heart to watch them.

Gonch is there too, and so is Semin, along with a lot of other Russians he hasn't talked to in a while. But he's a lot more interested in Alex and meeting his family.

Tatyana is a doll and she teaches Sidney how to cook some uncomplicated Russian dishes, and Mikhail Senior is like a Russian version of Mario. If only he could actually talk to them without Mikhail or Alex translating for him.

About a month into their vacation, Sidney wakes up to find Alex staring at him with a strange look in his eyes.

"Morning." Sidney says and kisses him.

"Hey, have something ask you." Alex still sounds groggy, which is one of Sid's favorite sounds.

"Ask away."

Alex rolls on his other side and digs through the nightstand, rolling back over a few seconds later. He holds up a black box and opens it, "Marry me?"

Sidney blinks, "Are-Are you serious?"

"Yes, very serious."

Sid smiles, "Of course I'll marry you."

Alex takes out the ring and slides it on Sid's finger. The three diamonds on the top sparkle from the sunlight shining through the windows. On the back it reads 'Forever'.

"I love you." Sidney whispers and kisses Alex before he responds.

They lazily make out for several minutes before Alex climbs on top of Sidney and kisses his jaw. "This room reeks of sex." Sid points out.

"Not my fault you so beautiful." Alex mumbles, trailing kisses down Sidney's body.

Sidney grins and starts to say something, but all that comes out is

 

Epilogue:

_-2021-_

Alex hasn't signed a new contract with the Capitals, and Sidney is starting to worry, but just a little bit. Alex insists that his agent is trying to get him a good contract that could cover him until he decides to retire. Still, the season is starting in a few weeks and they still haven't reached an agreement.

"You always say everything be okay, so stop worrying." Alex says the day before Sidney has to fly back to Pittsburgh. So Sid huffs and grabs his husband's large hand and plays with his wedding ring, the same way he plays with his own. Alex laughs, he always does.

"Why do you always laugh at me?" Sid asks playfully, "You know how much I love them."

"I know, but it's cute when you do that," Alex smiles, "Make me happy too."

Sidney smiles back, running his thumb along the 'S & A Ovechkin' enscribed in beautiful Russian. Its similar to one Jonny put on Kaner, but their's are in English for Patrick's sake. And they're like the one Claude exchanged with Daniel Briére, which are in French.

(When they became engaged, Claude got Sidney's number from Max and explained to him how he and Danny had broken up ''for good'' the day he kissed Sidney, but they had gotten back together the following morning. Obviously because of Danny's kids, they didn't want to come out until they were older and could handle things like that. Still, it's a shocker. Claude and Danny? Who saw that coming?)

The next morning, there's still no word on Alex's contract, so the couple fly back to Pittsburgh together because "why would I spend extra vacation time in lonely house in DC when could spend it with you?"

(There's still another day before practice officially starts, so they spend their time ruining Sidney's sheets)

The next day, Alex insists on coming to practice, because of course he does. And Mario - Mario _agrees_.

"He's your husband Sid, what harm could he do?" Mario says and shrugs.

 _My only voice of reason has officially abandoned me_ Sidney thinks and shakes his head.

Going into the Consol's locker room for the first time since they all left after the playoffs has always made him realize that the season is truly starting. Granted, there are some new faces and some that are no longer there.

Duper, Kuni, Adams, and Scuderi are all retired now. James was traded to Nashville in 2014 (where he was named captain and won the Cup in 2018), officially ending his relationship with Paulie, who left the following season for the Rangers. Jussi went back to the Panthers (the kid missed it there, everyone assumes.) Stempniak went to the Rangers. Vitale went to the Coyotes and Engelland went to Calgary. Tanger had, much to everyone's surprise, been traded to the Leafs two seasons ago. Mike Johnston and Jim Ritherford replaced Bylsma and Shero. Thomas Greiss had been a bust and was traded to the Oilers. Patric Hornqvist was send to the second line with Brandon Sutter and Kasperi Kapanen had taken Duper's place. Brooksie is planning to retire after-

Wait.

He scans the room again. He knows he's a little late, and everyone should be here by now.

"Where's Brooksie and Nisky?" Sid asks.

Flower's eyebrows knit, "Didn't -" he pauses, "I'm not sure."

Geno walks by them, but stops, "Not sure what?"

Flower's eye twitches - wait, was that a wink? "Sid was asking where Brooks and Matt are." 

Geno looks slightly amused, "Oh. I not sure either." 

"I hate you both." Sidney says - though others would call it a 'whine' - and takes his shirt off. Just because they're deciding to be assholes doesn't mean he can't get ready for practice. 

"Sid!" 

Sighing quietly, Sidney turns around, "What Alex? Haven't you bothered me enough?" 

Alex ignores his question and unfolds the black shirt he's holding, "Like new jersey?" 

Sid scans it over. Its a jersey - a _Penguins_ to be specific - with a number '8' and Ovechkin stitched into it. He snorts, "Real funny." 

Except .. Alex isn't laughing, or smiling. In fact, he looks kind of upset, "You .. you no like?" 

"Well, it's just a joke, right?" 

Ovie shakes his head. 

Sidney's heart stops and - oh my god. This isn't, this can't be, "So .. we're going to play together?" 

"We going to win Cup." Alex adds. 

Sid breaks put into this huge grin and throws himself at his husband. This - the only problem he's ever had with playing during the season is that he and Alex never had much tie together. But now, this - this is _perfect_. They're going to play together, and he'll never have to say goodbye again. 

And holy shit, the _Cup_. They're going to win it and - 

"Why didn't you tell me about this? Do you know how concerned I was?" Sidney asks, stepping back to give Alex a stern look. 

Ovie ducks his head, "Can you go back to being happy?" 

Sid smirks and wraps his hand around the back of Alex's neck, pulling him down for a kiss. It doesn't last as long as he would've liked because his - well, _their_ \- teammates start taking pictures and making sexual noises (they're still children). 

Johnston comes in and yells at them to get their asses moving, but even he's smiling. 

(That season, Sidney goes out a lot more than he usually does, and drinks a lot more than he should. But with Geno and Alex on his wings, they're playing great, so he allows himself to have a little fun.They don't win the Cup that season, but it's close, going seven games with the Rangers in the Conference Championship but lose, and he watches Nashville win it all from his couch in Russia. 

The next season is even better. They go to the Stanley Cup finals against the Kings. Its game four, and the Kings haven't been doing so good, the Pens are winning the series three to none, but the game is tied at two. 

Then, with five seconds left in the second period of double overtime, Alex takes a shot through four Kings and it - it goes in. It went it. They just - they just _won the Stanley Cup_. 

After both he and Alex finish their laps wih the Cup, Sidney pulls his husband in for the best kiss of his life and ignores their teammates. 

You'd think by the second and third Cup they won that their teammates would stop, but no, they don't. But it's fine, he has Alex and that's all he cares about.) 

 

_The End_


	21. Chapter 21

Hello guys!

Okay so this isn't an actual chapter (obviously). I actually wanted to give you guys a message.

For a while now I've wanted to turn this fic into a series . And now I've finally have.

There will be three follow up works with the three pairings (Jonny/Kaner, Claude/Danny, Geno/Nicky) mentioned in this fic. They will not be anywhere as long as these ones, but they will hopefully be just as good. Each one will have different endings about stuff that wasn't mentioned in the previous fic(s). I started with the Jonny/Kaner, To Chicago with Love, and I already have two chapters up. The chapters are very short, though.

I really hope you guys will read them and like them. However, if you don't like the pairing involved I wont force you to read it. Its not required to read all of them.

I want to thank once again thank all of the people who have subscribed to this work, who've bookmarked this, left kudos, and took the time to write a comment. I pray that the follow ups will be as enjoyable to you as well.

~Candace


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